Replies

Jul 4, 2015 10 years ago
Pureflower
is a flower child
User Avatar
Skula

The first draft for Nikko. I worked in a string of Oregon lakes and also tried to work in Nikko's intelligence by having him talk about some actual facts for the size of Elk Lake. Please let me know any changes you would like.

The first draft for Firaffe. I did go with a standard length. Usually sketches work best with pets where the TC tells a good part of the story. Please let me know any changes you would like.

Check out my writing shop! Pure&;s Pet Story Shop v2.0 (temp closed)

Holiday Links [egg=Pureflower] [tp=Pureflower]

Jul 4, 2015 10 years ago
nene
User Avatar
Angora

It's looking good! In the last bit, could you leave the part about the pets in my family ambiguous? Ex. just removing the names of them will do.

Ahh.. unfortunately I never really had any TC ideas for her. Looks like it'll be a collection of ice cream-related items, though (totally fine by me!) :)

Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
Pureflower
is a flower child
User Avatar
Skula

An updated draft for Firaffe. If everything looks good, I have Lot for you and this was a standard story at 1.5 mil. :)

Check out my writing shop! Pure&;s Pet Story Shop v2.0 (temp closed)

Holiday Links [egg=Pureflower] [tp=Pureflower]

Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
Midge
is bright-eyed and bushy-tailed
User Avatar
Kammi_275

It's great right now! :)

I actually raised some sP and I can afford to lengthen it to standard. Do you think it'd be possible to do that and add in a part where they go to a spot much like the picture on his profile?

...come anchor me down.

Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
Pureflower
is a flower child
User Avatar
Skula

An updated draft for Nikko. I worked in the image on his profile and also tried to develop his character a little more, especially with how he is reluctant to try new things but Kitten is teaching him to enjoy doing so. With a standard I can add about 350 words yet if you want any other additions. When you are happy with the story I have Lot and this one will be 1.5 mil.

Check out my writing shop! Pure&;s Pet Story Shop v2.0 (temp closed)

Holiday Links [egg=Pureflower] [tp=Pureflower]

Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
Midge
is bright-eyed and bushy-tailed
User Avatar
Kammi_275

Aww, that was beyond perfect! You managed to get his personality exactly where I wanted it :) I'll go pay now!

...come anchor me down.

Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
nene
User Avatar
Angora

It looks good, thank you! Just offered. :) (P.S. I've got it saved to her profile by the way, so you can delete it from Yowel's! It's just hidden until I can think of a layout/TC for her.)

Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
Rox
wants to believe
User Avatar
Syrra

Thank you so much, the story is perfect :D I offered on the trade :)

[IMG]http://i.imgur.com/p9GYeo3.png[/IMG]
CW Cash Shop
Wishlist

Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
Quagsire
has been EXTERMINATED
User Avatar
Mallius

slot open? pick one of two :D

nekomancer You can fill out as many or as few of the optional fields as you like.

Required:

Pet Name: Ziggy

Setting: The sacred lands of subeta

Personality: studious, easily frightened , intelligent

Physical traits: He is a young wyllop studying magic but likes to focus on summons. the problem is that he is usually scared by what he summons. he wears a deep navy cloak with a gold trim. white fur, pink nose, black eyes.

Likes/Dislikes: likes summoning, books . dislikes big scary monsters (lets age him around 13-14?)

Anything else?: i did have an idea of a story. he is summoning a new creature. something that was more docile he hoped. Summoning is like waterbending for him. the summon starts as an inkblot, and then into a long blob,and before long into a long black cat, totally black but with pupiless white eyes. He was frightened, but soon shows how docile it is.

You can fill out as many or as few of the optional fields as you like.

Maharaja SO her story is like half written...

Pet Name:Maharaja

Setting: Europe controlled India [spoiler=current story]As the only child of an esteemed doctor and a celebrated pianist, Maharaja was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. But her parents were busy and distant, and she grew up as isolated as a princess in a tower. She never really learned to connect with people. Maharaja was one of the wealthiest students at her private school, and this extra distinction made her feel even more lonely and lost. Her only defensive mechanism was to wrap herself up in the idea that she must be superior to the others. It was as if she were in a tower of her own construction all the time, no matter how many people were around her...for Maharaja did not consider them to be her peers.

But when someone has been so alone for so long, the walls she builds around herself can begin to grow brittle. And that means that the person who finally breaks through might do so by chance rather than by merit. Unfortunately, this is what happened to Maharaja when she was seventeen years old.

She met him on a street corner one day, the travel-worn young man with the pack and the violin. He called out to her, low and sweet, and she came to him even though she had been taught that his kind wasn’t fit to so much as speak to hers. It didn’t matter. Maharaja was inexorably drawn to him by the kind of sparking chemical ties that drive people out of their minds with passion. She was in love.

And perhaps he loved her too. But if he did it was a fleeting and absent love, the kind of love a wanderer has for a place that he briefly calls “home” before moving on. Only five beautiful weeks later he was gone, and Maharaja was heartbroken.

She learned very quickly what it was like to be looked down upon. The other girls whispered and pointed and skirted around her in groups in the halls, and that was before anyone (or Maharaja herself) knew that she was pregnant. When she did figure it out, she stopped going to school entirely. Neither of her parents were in the country. She lived between her bedroom and the kitchen for about a week, until one of the maids became concerned and finally confronted her. Maharaja had never interacted with the household help much before, but now she broke down and told them everything, and she was indescribably grateful when they welcomed her into their lives like a comforting group of aunts and sisters.

Maharaja’s new friends were the kinds of people that she had never been able to empathize with before: ordinary people. Not all of them had finished school, and one of them had never learned to read or write properly. Another had a birthmark on her hand that had never been bleached or treated. When Maharaja asked why, the woman laughed and said that it didn’t really matter, didn’t it? Maharaja supposed that it didn’t, when she thought about it. Slowly, the girl was learning that the perfection that she had been raised to expect didn’t really exist in the real world—and that perhaps that wasn’t such a frightening thing.

Personality: stuck up turned humbled

Physical traits: x

Likes/Dislikes: Likes tea and her son, dislikes impoliteness

[/spoiler]


Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
Pureflower
is a flower child
User Avatar
Skula

I usually send the coded story through smail but since you have the copy saved, it's all good. =)

First slot is yours as soon as I get the form. :)

Check out my writing shop! Pure&;s Pet Story Shop v2.0 (temp closed)

Holiday Links [egg=Pureflower] [tp=Pureflower]

Jul 5, 2015 10 years ago
Quagsire
has been EXTERMINATED
User Avatar
Mallius

edited c:


Jul 6, 2015 10 years ago
Flier
is fast as lightning
User Avatar
Raffe

Assuming you're accepting forms..? (:

Form for Optimist Required: Pet Name: Optimist (in the story, Opt or Imi - he goes by both, depending on who he's with, though the particulars of this have yet to be figured out - though Imi does seem to have a softer tone to me? Imi for those he's more intimate with?)

Setting: A forest (which lies on the outer edge of a town, his home lies on this edge) which leads to unknown (to Opt/Imi at least) lands

Personality: Cheerful personality. Always sees the good/beauty in things. Sarcastic sense of humor. Pretty active, sometimes restless.

Optional:

PoV: 3rd!

Physical traits: Has the looks of an unintentional troublemaker

Likes/Dislikes: A skilled archer who experiences deep satisfaction when he hits his mark (his mark usually being silly things, like pinecones and pineapples). His fondest wish is to see the world. Often ventures out deeper and deeper into the forest as a result. Enjoys reading poetry (has a well-worn Book of Poetry at home). He tries to create his own poems while he's traveling/sprinting/darting through the forest (he prefers navigating the interwoven branches above instead of the forest ground below), but he's admittedly a terrible poet.

Other characters to include: Befriended a fox named Rob through the help of pineapples (while in the forest)

Preferred Length: I would prefer a character sketch or a standard story. I definitely don't mind paying for a long story if you find yourself on a roll (though if you end up writing a longer story, short paragraphs would be nice? Though not necessary if it doesn't work with the story!)

Anything else?: It would be ideal if you would be able to incorporate the following into the story: (listed above) his skill with a bow and arrow, the poetry things, and pineapples. If you can fit Rob in too, that would be awesome but don't worry about it if you find that you can't! :)

Let me know if you need me to clarify or expand on anything :)

[Edit]

Form for Flier Required:

Pet Name: Flier

Setting: An open desert at night with the moon shining overhead and the sky filled with stars

Personality: He's playful, naturally curious, and mischievously affectionate (mischievous in general, actually).

Optional:

PoV: 3rd!

Physical traits: Scribble sheeta like so~ (or a young regular sheeta)

Likes/Dislikes: Believes that someday he'll be able to fly - his greatest wish is to touch the stars (where his heart lies). He often goes stargazing, mentally tracing the constellations and imagining himself flying along these invisible lines. He practices "flying" often by flying across the desert sands, an activity he greatly enjoys.

Like other wild sheetas, he lives in the open desert and loves to come out in the cool of night to play with the other shetlings in his twilight (group of sheetas).

Not a fan of bugs (especially not as food, despite his parents' attempts to persuade him of their deliciousness), though enjoys chasing fireflies because to his innocent eyes they look like twinkling stars. (... special desert fireflies c: )

His favorite constellation is Orion because it was the first constellation he ever found (he saw it immediately when he glanced up at the night sky after he received Guide to Constellations from his parents. Specifically, he found Orion's Belt immediately, and from there, Orion).

One of his greatest treasures is a clear glass bottle with a miniature model of a ship nestled within. No one in his twilight knows how the ship got in there or how Flier came to own this mysterious bottle. It's a flying ship of course c:

Preferred Length: I would prefer a character sketch or a standard story. Though I don't want you to feel limited by length concerns! I would of course be willing to pay for a longer story if you find yourself writing one :)

Anything else?: Let me know if I need to clarify or expand or give more details on anything!

Art by !

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ping group | cw shop | cw thread. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

** Wishlist **

Jul 7, 2015 10 years ago
Joker
is forever on a quest for more pets
User Avatar
2B

Amazing stories! :*

Pet Name: Liliya (Kansen) [Here

Setting: Gloomy, rainy city

PoV: First person c:

Prefered length: Complex Story: 2,501-3,500 Words 5 mil

Personality: She's a huge geek, loves video games, hates when people calles her Liliya (she prefers Lili), kind, sweet & bubbly. Has another "personality", like a virus (She calles her Kansen). Then she turns cold, evil and powerful.

Physical traits: She has Black hair with crimson highlights, when Infection takes over she has teal hair, glitchy blue eyes, glitchy scars and pixels emiting from her.

Likes/Dislikes: Likes: Rainy days, tea, gaming, & cats Dislikes: Lags, Kansen

Other characters to include: Her best friend Wes.

Anything else?: In the end she'll be completely consumed by Kansen. She'll no longer be Liliya.

Jul 8, 2015 10 years ago
Pureflower
is a flower child
User Avatar
Skula

The first draft for Maharaja. I tried to use authentic Indian names throughout the piece. Please let me know any changes you would like.

The first draft for Optimist. Writing bad poetry is so much fun. =D I tried to include as many details as possible listed for his personality and I found a good use for Rob in the story. Please let me know any changes you would like.

She sounds intriguing. :D I should have an outline for you in the next day or so. One question I do have, since her personality shifts based on whether she is Liliya or Kansen is how this affects her relationship to Wes? Is he aware of her "dark side" going into the story or is this something he should discover in the course of the story? Does he still support her when she fully becomes Kansen or will he abandon her?

Check out my writing shop! Pure&;s Pet Story Shop v2.0 (temp closed)

Holiday Links [egg=Pureflower] [tp=Pureflower]

Jul 8, 2015 10 years ago
Flier
is fast as lightning
User Avatar
Raffe

(Was embarrassingly enough actually squeeing inside when reading the story o I'm just really excited right now haha) Loving the bad poetry, and I'm glad you had fun writing them!! :D ("Most of the buds were infected with rot." I loved this line so much haha, also this: "There were not a lot of polite options one could pair with coconut")

Revision requests? "He scowled, muttering a verse under his breath." >>Would it be possible to change scowled to a lighter term? Such as frowned and sighed good-naturedly (I feel like there's a word for the expression I'm picturing, but I just can't think of the word ;u; ) Like, he scowled but he has a cheerful disposition that doesn't make the scowl as angry? Ack, struggling with words right now. Ooh!! Or like he scowled but then his expression lights up because he thought of the verse! Because "awyes poetry inspiration" haha

""My friends call me Imi."" >>Could you edit this to also insert the name Opt? Like "I'm known(?) ---- (maybe insert something here? not sure) as Opt, but my friends call me Imi" ?

Little things and tiny typos that you'd very likely catch on your next read through, but I'll list them here anyway just in case it would be helpful for you:

"Pine nuts would make a sound like gentle rain that was soothing. He would sometimes string special nets on the lowest palm fronds, catching as many nuts as he could for an afternoon snack." >>Is there a distinction between these pine nuts and the pine needles/trees/cones up North if Opt doesn't know what pine needles are? I'm not a tree expert, but would there be a way to incorporate the distinction into the story if there is one?

"cheering when the pineapple burst with a satisfying gush of sound." >>Is he high up enough that this doesn't scare off Rob?

"The c reature" >> extra space between "c" and "r"

"He held up a paw, stretching his body as far up Opt's tree as he could reach. "Will you shake on it?" " >>Did Opt drop to the ground earlier?

"freezing our tail off" >> "your tail"?

Also I really love how you wrote Rob/made him come to life! And the journal part! Now I must find a journal to add to Optimist's TC! And how the story ended, ""What's the matter, Rob. Did I outfox you?"" new favorite line Actually I just kind of love it all AND I'M STILL REALLY EXCITED AHHH I JUST ♥ really like how you write things o (sorry for all the text!)

Art by !

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ping group | cw shop | cw thread. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

** Wishlist **

Jul 8, 2015 10 years ago
Joker
is forever on a quest for more pets
User Avatar
2B

*I'm on my phone so, sorry for any typos ^^

It does affect their relationship, but not so severe. Just some small arguments that is usually resolved the next day.

He is aware that she get crankier from time to time, but doesn't know that Sen exist until Lili tells him.

He would probably get angry and abandon her at first, but they have been friends for so long, he could never do that to her. He supports her and try to help her at least control her temper as Sen ^^

I hope this answers all!

Jul 9, 2015 10 years ago
Pureflower
is a flower child
User Avatar
Skula

The first draft for Nekomancer. I hope I was right that his nickname is Ziggy? I tried to give his character the feel of a student to make him seem younger.

The first draft for Flier. I went into the Subeta lore for Sheetas and really tried to include plenty of fitting details in the story.

I also have An updated draft for Optimist. I think I got all the requested changes but let me know if I missed anything. :)

Check out my writing shop! Pure&;s Pet Story Shop v2.0 (temp closed)

Holiday Links [egg=Pureflower] [tp=Pureflower]

Jul 9, 2015 10 years ago
Flier
is fast as lightning
User Avatar
Raffe

I love the characters you introduced (also I totally want to make a pet for Scruff now)(also Barley and Fleet and then with Flier, the three of them can go on a bunch of adventures). And the part with Orion was just so poetic o

ALSO YES THE CAPTAIN PART that is a perfect addition that I didn't even think of, now I need to get some Captain stuff for his TC! And aw, the ending :')

I didn't notice anything that I'd want to change with my read-through(/commenting/fangirling)!

As for Optimist, looks perfect to me as well!♥ This is so exciting, I've never commissioned stories before and it's so cool how you're bringing these characters to life and aH

I'll let you set up a lot for the two? (:

Also, would it be weird if I asked to be put onto the waitlist? I have this really vague idea for my pet Wordplay, and if you would be interested in trying to work with it, I would be happy to see what you come up with! But no worries if the idea doesn't catch your interest!

the vague idea Twin beings(owls? Or just unnamed mysterious souls). I'll be uncreative and call one of them Word and one of them Play.

Word visits the dreams of writers, influencing them. He plays with the strings of language (like the Fates deal with the threads of life, but not? But kinda? Maybe? I don't know enough of their mythology), and he weaves words and different realities together. He's like the keeper of the gates(?) to these alternate realities/universes, with words being the keys, the tickets, the vessels, etc. It's elegant, intricate, delicate work (/play; interesting juxtaposition here!)(this is his way of playing with words?). Occasionally, letters are delivered by various owls to writers whose dreams Word has visited, signed only with a "W" in fancy script (blank inside? An inspiring photo inside? Inspiration of some sort? Or just a mystery? No idea). I'm not much of a writer, but I guess this could deal with the (clichéd?) magic that writers produce with words, or just the magic of language in general?

Play on the other hand, is more about play on words. Eg: puns. And the "witty exploitation of the meanings and ambiguities of words" (thanks Google). Her work/play is more infused with wit and amusement. I feel like she has more of a lighthearted nature than her twin. Not quite sure if she also delivers letters, or has a more clever way to spread her joy of wordplay?

Art by !

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ping group | cw shop | cw thread. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

** Wishlist **

Jul 9, 2015 10 years ago
Pureflower
is a flower child
User Avatar
Skula

I have Lot and these were a long (Opt) and standard (Flier) for a total of 4.5 mil.

I am very interested in Wordplay and I already have an idea of how Word would be the sort of master language muse that gets the writer really focused and writing and Play is the witty one that gives the writers those lines that make readers grin. I'm thinking for setting the pair could live on a Greek-type island with nice trees and a tropical feel and they could fly all over the world to visit writers, visiting large cities and hermit caves alike to spread their muse powers. This one definitely gives me ideas. xD

Check out my writing shop! Pure&;s Pet Story Shop v2.0 (temp closed)

Holiday Links [egg=Pureflower] [tp=Pureflower]

Jul 9, 2015 10 years ago
Flier
is fast as lightning
User Avatar
Raffe

I offered! ^o^

And oooh yes I like what you have going there so far o: (especially the Greek-type island part). Excited that you already have some ideas and that you're interested! :D

In that case, would you like me to fill out a form? :P (And Cryaotic and I can switch slot places? Assuming that no one else posts before I post!) I'd have no preference for length~ (and I'd be cool with one interwoven story, or two separate ones for Word and Play!)

Art by !

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁. ping group | cw shop | cw thread. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁ ⟡ ݁ . ⊹ ₊ ݁.

** Wishlist **

Please log in to reply to this topic.