Well I'm apparently terrible at keeping boyfriends cuz Michael left me today. I was crying all morning and tried to distract myself with Super Smash Brothers Brawl. It worked until the TV fucked up. My mom also thought it'd be a good idea to drag me around in the outside world in the condition I'm in. I've been holding in the tears all afternoon/evening. Every little thing reminds me of him. I think I still love him...I don't know what to do. His best friend-slash-brother-like-figure told me the texts didn't sound like him and I kind of agreed but that's probably just me being stuck on him.

I'm lost now. I literally gave him my everything. He was perfect for me...

VHF

@ Ravens @ Reaper (I don't think you guys are in my ping group?)

UPDATES :3 I talked to Charles, Michael's bestest friend in the world that is basically his brother, and he was talking to Michael earlier. Apparently Michael is willing to talk to me about everything that is going on with us in about a week (so like friday or saturday). Charles is pretty sure he still has feelings for me and kind of helped me see what's been going on with me that I didn't notice. i.e. I've turned into a major bitch over the time Michael and I were together because of the friends I had surrounded myself with at school. I really don't want to lose him so if I explain to him that I want to fix everything I might have a chance to get him back. I don't know if we'll go straight back to dating or if we'll just be friends until I graduate this year cuz my mom hates him now and said I won't be seeing him for a long time if we do fix our relationship. The whole not seeing each other thing kind of sucks and is part of the problems that led to this but I'm going to lay it out there before hand so he knows before we possibly get back together. I'm lame but I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Thanks again for all of your support guys. I love you all.

Kinda upset cuz I wrote like a forever long thing and then lost it cuz my internet screwed up. Rewrite: I asked Michael when he could talk and he refused to actually talk, saying he'd rather text cuz he was hanging out with his sister or some bull and wanted to get the conversation done with or something. (he didn't actually say that but blah) So anyway. I spilled my guts in a mile long text. He accepted my apology. But. He still doesn't want to go out. I was stupid and asked if he still had any feelings for me, to which he said no not really. It was only a week. A single fucking week. So I texted a few friends who made me feel better. I talked to Charles since he kind of convinced Michael to talk to me. I had thought something earlier in the week but dropped it cuz I didn't want to believe that "my Michael" would do it but Charles brought it up too. We came to the conclusion that Michael handled everything in the worst kind of way and pulled the jerkiest move he could have ever done. fuck and run I'm trying to avoid what happened the last time I was dumped. I was hung up on him for a few months after. So I'm ignoring the feelings that come up when I think about him (which I do a lot unfortunately). I'm also listening to a lot of music, trying to avoid thinking about him at all and/or making myself feel better about being dumped again with a dash of break up songs about moving on and how he wasn't good enough or something like that. Idk. I'm just trying to move on and it's so bfhkdjdhgihafsdi

Logged Out

I don't even know anymore

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