<3

Oh wow, forgot. DX Uh, I wish I had some cake.

Now no one stops to have fun. :c

Granted, but someone put salt instead of sugar when baking the cake.

I wish I didn't feel so anxious when driving.

granted, you're so calm driving that you fall asleep at the wheel - I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

I wish I had an Oh Henry chocolate bar.

Granted, but it's 30 years old and a little stale (sorry).

I wish Earth days were about 4 hours longer.

Granted, but most plants are now dead as they couldn't get used to the change.

I wish my bra straps didn't fall down all the time.

Granted, but now they are superglued to your shoulders.

I wish my lawn could cut itself.

That's a win in my book. xD

It can, but it also cuts anything that walks/moves over it - your footwear, feet, pets, lawnmower, wheels, ...

I wish my thumb wouldn't hurt.

granted, but its going to be hard going through life without thumbs.

I wish my coffee pot was right next to me instead of having to walk to the kitchen to get another cup. (I'm so lazy!)

granted, but you'll start shaking uncontrollably with no walk to the coffee pot to burn off that energy

I wish I could fly.

Granted, but now you are a housefly.

I wish I had an avocado tree.

granted, but it gives an avocado a year

I wish my dog wouldn't be so annoying.

Granted - your dog is now a toddler, so you no longer have an annoying dog. Good luck with the toddler though ;)

I wish my hair would never get dirty

granted. It now looks like plastic.

I wish I had a new car

Granted, but it's going to be a lemon.

I wish I was more motivated to work out.

granted, you're being pursued by determined cannibals. I hope you brought your Fitbit!

I wish that I could travel the world without having to worry about money.

You no longer worry about money because you're now a thief! However, you do worry about getting caught.

I wish spotify ads weren't so annoying.

Granted; you now enjoy the ads. Unfortunately, they're so great that you can't stop yourself from buying every single thing advertised.

I wish unhealthy things never tasted good.

granted...now everything tastes like plain tofu-yes, even if you sprinkle hot sauce on it, because the hot sauce also tastes like plain tofu.

I wish for world peace.

- Granted. The world of Mars is at peace.

I wish for summer vacation to arrive.

Vacation arrives but everything you've planned goes wrong when you realise you agreed to teach summer school.

I wish the building site nearby would be quieter.