News Archive: Week 13, 2018

Are you bleeping kidding me!? I have to finance my own holiday every year, but a literal amorphous blob gets a whole monthly collection?

I honestly do not get the priorities of this place, sometimes. Like, y’all remember I drove my pizza van up a mountain just to help out, right? Do you even know what kind of logistical nightmare it is to get a van onto an unincorporated tropical island to begin with? And that’s just a normal island! This one was cursed by a sea witch! Now, to be fair, I did use the power of fourth-wall, but that’s not the point my dudes.

You know what? Whatever, let all the people with terrible taste have their precious, beloved blob garbage. I’ve got something for the rest of us.

Beware of the BLOB. It crawls, it creeps, it eats you alive! No wait, we're thinking of something else. This blob is actually very gentle and just wants to encompass you with love. Slimy, oozy love. Also it's vegetarian.

Oozing into the <a href=https://subeta.net/cashshop.php?act=items#/Collection>Cash Shop now, this month's collection is sure to fulfill your blobbiest desires, or just fill any container you leave laying around empty.

You can also purchase one of our older <a href=https://subeta.net/cashshop.php?act=items#/Collection>April Donation Presents or Collections!

Celebrate whatever this is by taking one home with you!

While standards may be slipping somewhere, the workroom remains committed to high quality. We've redesigned the steamwork ruffie, a worthy companion for any ball-goer if trained correctly.

The second and final wave has hit the Steamworks Menagerie! You might actually die from dancing so much for these rad items.

Need more lounge trinkets? You can buy these bags with steamworks trinkets and get lounge trinkets out of them!

Masquerade items from 2009 have returned!

The Gas Masks have also returned. You can find them in the 2012 tab!

Hey, ball-goers! This party is in full swing but the real party hasn’t really begun yet. You know what I’m talking about. It’s Panzer Hydra time!

The Panzer Hydra in all of its forms will be available until the end of the holiday (that’s April 8th to you guys), and we’re back this year with a new loot item for each form! Remember, to battle this thing you’ll start off against the single-headed version, and if you defeat it ten times you’ll earn yourself an achievement and a medal that you’ll use to unlock the three-headed version. Defeat that one ten times to get the medal to unlock the next, and keep doing that all the way up to the final eight-headed Panzer Hydra!

Note: If you unlocked the Panzer Hydras last year, you will not get the achievements/medals again.

For those of you who really loved the medals that disappeared when used, there are now replicas to be found in the Millionaire Center thanks to a little sponsorship by the dragon slayer himself.

Get battling and have fun!

Do something new with your hair for the Masquerade with these <a href=https://subeta.net/shop.php?shopid=14>new headbands!

'Allo my darlings, how are you enjoying your time at the ball? I'm having a little...trouble persuading certain other people to welcome the Lower Ziarans and their wares for the full duration of the ball, but do not worry for they will be here soon!

Until then, Vic has let me present this steamwork bumbus to you! I helped with some of the more delicate pieces, isn't it delightful?

You can buy the schematic HERE and take it over to Isaac to get your new pet made up. You also need a Yunium Key - found in the Menagerie.