Wait, what? You don't get to profit off someone else's trauma. Gross!

That sounds a lot like blackmail. I came here because someone on my friends list was posting here on the stalker feed and I thought someone had decided to have a quieter saner discussion about the item issues, not...whatever you are trying to do here.

OK for clarity's sake, you agree with me about the items, but I don't agree with you about any of this right here.

I have been hanging out on Discord and you have no idea how hard has been working.

I find it pretty disgusting to ask for csc compensation for everyone because there are traumatized users. Everyone getting 5$ isn't going to take away their trauma and the fact that they were triggered. Half of your first post is dedicated to essentially begging for free money.

Towards those people who were in fact triggered the only thing that can probably be done is someone of staff messaging them to check if they are ok and apologize.

I just think that the kinky stuff maybe should be in a separate tab. Then people who know they might be sensitive to the content can avoid it.

Ironically, no publicity would be bad publicity for subeta.

Subeta getting a viral moment would probably be huge for them lol. Even if you converted on like .1% of 1 million views and got 1000 users out of a viral news story that would probably break the site with new traffic.

I doubt this is going to get subeta any viral moment... Although maybe they should shoot for one lol.

My apologies. I didn't realize that my suggestion would be seen as profiting off someone's trauma. I intended for these people to get support because, let's face it, many of them won't get a chance to legally give the boot to those who abused them. I just wanted them to have a small victory.

Agree that staff should make a formal apology.

Subeta should get a viral moment, but this misstep isn't the way to do it. The kink stuff isn't illegal, but it's a very slippery slope that could lead to legal headaches.

I told my sister about this after breakfast.

It's not newsworthy because there is nothing graphical shown. The HA is just people wearing the items.

So, it wouldn't even go viral, it would just make OP feel like they're part of One Million Moms. Had this happened 10 years ago, it could have been a topic of controversy, but with teenagers being able to buy video games where they can just go and kill everyone?

Not a chance this is making the news.

Also I do not support volunteer coders. Coding is hard. Being a coder is a job. If Subeta cannot afford coders, well...they'll have to make-do with what they have.

They could put actual pornographic photos into an item, and plaster them on the front page and it wouldn't make news or go viral.

I support putting the items on a separate tab just because I'd like to believe we'd then see more in the future ¯(ツ)/¯

Personally I'm not bothered, I absolutely don't feel the need to be compensated, and while I understand these could be troublesome for some there are items onsite that are absolutely giant ass triggers for me too (so much so that all HAs are blocked on forums indefinitely) but I'm not whining about it because hey others enjoy these things.

I've got my complaints with the site and stuff but most of those are my own problems that I admit I vent about a bit too much sometimes.

So yes, I found the new items a bit shocking, but what concerns me most is that younger players might not understand what they're for and use them innocently in HAs without realising their actual purpose. 16-year-old me from when I first joined would have been confused, I didn't start looking at the broader internet and losing most of my inocence until I was nearly 17. Maybe the age could be raised from 13 to 16, but that's just my thoughts.

As for the forums being down along with the shoutbox, yes, it was frustrating, but Bug worked hard to bring the forums back and I feel like the extension should only really be a day or two (I won't complain if it's more though). Being given a lot of CSC doesn't seem like a good idea though. We already get free CSC through Morty Cards, and GAs are only really given out if there's been bigger site problems. I did think maybe we could have something as a reward for our patience with the forums, but I had no idea what, so I think an extra day of the event would be good for those who couldn't get any bites while the forums were down).

Also, it's annoying that the shoutbox is down too, but at least we were informed of the reason for it this time when last time this happened, we didn't hear anything about why it was closed for days until I made a thread about it. And I would prefer that to be down than for the strains to not work properly (at the moment I'm paranoid about mine suddenly disappearing and me having to start all over again, that happened last year).

The people who have been triggered have identified themselves and no matter what the staff decides to do about that, it shouldn't result in you or me getting anything.

I do agree that the kink stuff and the pins being sold in the same store at the same time can be interpreted in an unfortunate way, but primarily I think the more "extreme" items should have just been in a separate tab and not taken over the shop. That would have solved that issue, as well as the issue for the sex-repulsed ace people who had to walk through a wall of leather to get to the ace pins.

In addition to Giselle Kinkylove, there are already CW whips and manacles on site. I own them! It is good that you don't have to buy CWs to get these items now. Most people just kind of don't even notice them because most people use them in avatars with multiple kinds of items.

I honestly think most people who were upset were not upset so much that the items exist, but rather that they were all in one place that everyone expected to contain other stuff. I think people would've been OK with it if it had been presented differently.

I'm not sure there's anything you can do about the age issue, because I can't recall if the site knows our actual ages other than that we're not 12 or under. But to my way of thinking, there are plenty of adults who don't want this content, so a warning and a different tab would have still been nice.

Once they're out in the wild, I suspect that most of the minors and adults who don't want to see these items won't, because they probably are not friends with and don't interact much with the people on the site who will use the items, and because I don't think most people who do use the items will use them all at once, all the time.

The real issue was the inescapable, unexpected, inyerface presentation of the items and the bait-and-switch where people went into the shop expecting...probably lots of different things, but none of which were that, and none of which were there.

... yes, the items are fine in and of themselves, but to someone who's not interested in it and has never experienced walking into a shop specifically catering to that demographic, the presentation would have been a bit of a shock. One or two items at a time sometimes turn up in TV shows or fashion shoots, but you usually don't get it all in one place unless you knowingly and consciously make the decision to go to the place where all of it lives.

Shops like this IRL have cuffs and maybe a harness or two in the window displays, except on some parts of Castro and Folsom streets, and a little notice on or near the door saying "no kids allowed". If you are into it, then when you go inside, it's like finally being in Disneyland, but if you're not into it, you don't go in. I think people would've been happier if they'd been given the choice to decide whether or not to go in after being given a general idea of what to expect. Some people would've been upset no matter what, of course, but the numbers would have been much smaller.

I mean, even Good Vibrations, which is not even specifically a kink shop, has windows that are mostly opaque.

Chiming in to second thanking for doing all they can to keep thing running smoothly despite the issues that cropped up. (That event related issues are hardly the only bumps in the road make it all the more impressive; bug has a lot on his plate on any given day, from the looks of it!)

As for the rest of this... oof. Honestly I'd have expected a thread like this to be made by a newer player, someone who hasn't been around years to see the sort of issues that crop up and how staff handles it. Frustration when problems crop up is one thing, but this almost feels like taking advantage of good will. Staff tries their best to keep everyone happy, everything running smoothly, and to keep things fun. I can think of plenty of times they've gifted ga time to the site at large or extended events to make up for unforeseen issues that were out of their hands but solved as quickly as they could solve them. They're not here to min/max profits or take advantage of anyone's patience, so to suggest trying to take advantage of their generosity (and to use other people's trauma as an excuse) to try and get multiple virtual items or currency for free... it's a bit, I dunno, tacky?

Oof. There's a lot going on in this thread.

First off: thank you and other staff for working so hard to keep things running as smoothly as possible. Taking the forums down temporarily so they could be fixed was absolutely the right decision and I don't understand people's complaints about that. But then I also don't understand when people complain about businesses being closed temporarily irl. It's an extremely minor inconvenience and I don't think anyone should ever complain about it.

Secondly, I don't like the kink items. I don't like hearing about people's kinks and I don't like it when people bring them into a public space. I think a major part of the conversation about kink-shaming and sex positivity is not shaming people for not wanting to see that all the time whether they have trauma related to it or not. Not that this is anyone's business -- I don't have to justify my feelings, experiences, etc. -- but I actually get panicked and have a lot of mental health problems when people shove sexual content in my face and I'm not prepared for it. It's just how my brain is wired. I thought I would grow out of it but I never did. So I wasn't exactly happy to go to Louis L'Amour's shop and see that so many of the items were kink-related. Some really grossed me out.

So... I blocked the images. Every single person can do that, even on mobile. It takes a little bit of time and minimal effort but it's 100% your responsibility, imo. I use filters in most places if there's going to be content that can trigger mental health problems for me. I think more places should put content warnings and I do think that the items could've been flagged, put in another tab, etc. but they weren't so I just did my best to deal with my feelings and I blocked the images. I would appreciate staff warning people about such content in the future, same with gore, but I'm not about to get petulant and make demands. I also block gorey/sexual/pregnancy-related items/challengers/characters/etc.

I am really, really not a fan of people asking for CSC and other things at all, but especially not for reasons like the forums being temporarily down when the staff always end up extending holidays when stuff like that happens (so you're not missing out on anything) or because some people were upset about some items. Too many people in this world act really entitled and it bothers me, especially because I used to work retail so I dealt with people who asked for or demanded "compensation" over minor real or perceived inconveniences every day. For example, I would never ask for -- much less demand -- that I get something because an item I wanted was sold out or a store was closed on the day I wanted to go. That kind of thinking doesn't even compute to me. It's a completely alien way of thinking. To me, stuff like that is just a part of life. Inconveniences happen. So what?

Like, I get annoyed with lag on sites, games, etc. Of course that's frustrating! But I don't go to the devs or staff and ask for free things because of unexpected lag. It happens! I just wait until the site or game is more stable. There's always the option to not play for a while if you're frustrated. Games are supposed to be fun but I feel like people take them way too seriously sometimes. So many things are being taken too seriously. You can't even tell someone they should probably not be taking a game so seriously without getting an essay back about how, "ACTUALLY this is a SERIOUS ISSUE because professionalism/compensation/deals/etc."

Anyway, to sum it up: staff are working hard so kudos to them (but please also take care of yourselves), people take things too seriously, I don't like the kink items so I dealt with it myself as should other people and asking for or demanding compensation for minor inconveniences which have already been rectified by extending the holiday is tacky.

Thing is, more programmers on an issue won't necessarily solve the issue. That's like hiring 9 women to make a baby in 1 month.

I think it could've been handled better, but the server has been having issues for a long while.

So is the shoutbox planned to be down for the whole event? Any hope of fixing whatever issues it is causing? It just doesn't feel like subeta without it!

I think staff did a fine job keeping us informed for the bit of time things went the way they do for the first day of events. (& extra days for bites will be great!) Have zero issues with any of the new the items too. No one is talking about these cute as hell boxers for the boxers either, and I think that's a real shame. :( Look at this guy! ❤️❤️❤️ Though, kind of surprised that there wasn't a book about love, trust, consent, communication, aftercare, & trauma shears this year to fit in with some of them. ha.

Also, a reminder: People who are sexually inappropriate towards anyone of any age? They do it because of who they are; it has nothing to do with who they do it to. The excuses of "she smiled at me, he was wearing that, they were drunk" No. The very small number of people who are going to do the most terrible things are going to do them because they want to, not because some potentially child user is wearing an item. If someone acts like a creep? Sending inappropriate messages or images? Immediately block them, report them, & help keep everyone safe. Even if it's embarrassing, even if you feel at fault? It's allllll on the other person & they're going to be absolute garbage towards any warm body they can because they're shit that gets off on it. TL:DR; The existence of a handful of new bdsm items isn't going to create a problem where there isn't one to begin with. If there is? Be powerful and help stop it. You can do it! I believe in you!

Lastly, the whole thing about avatar/pet sites being for kids. In all seriousness, is this even true? Adults enjoy cute things too. It really looks like the majority of people who actively play these games are the same ones who did when they first became popular, which is over 20 years ago now. No doubt there are younger players, but this genre of games really seems to attract a predominantly older, & often LGBTQIA+, crowd. The 13+ is for COPPA compliance, not target audience. (Not that we need to be "mature subject matters" all the time or anything.)

[edit]"You got a forum point while making a post!" yesssss

Personally, when I think of a pet site Neopets is what comes to mind. Perhaps other might think of Animal Jam or Club Penguin. All of those sites are geared toward children, so it IS possible for pet sites to have that "for kids" reputation. Pet sites are an extension of those tiny virtual pets kids used to get back in the day right?

I made this thread because the backlash made me worried. Subeta is 13+ officially and I was worried that it could face legal troubles for the kink items. I'm glad stated that this incident is unlikely to cause a stir in the media.

Slight tangent, a while ago I submitted a ticket asking staff if it was okay to post the story for

It feels off to me that I took precautions to not break any taboos by the site and the staff didn't try warning the userbase beforehand about this items. I'll repeat that I wouldn't have asked for compensation if this intense backlash had not occured. I would have just chalked the whole forum disaster to business as usual and moved on.

Subeta is supposed to feel like a safe space for people with a non-hetero orientation. For some of those users, the kink items mixed with the pride items was a HUGE slap in the face. One of these users even questioned whether people on this site were truly compassionate.

Going strictly by definition/tangent you set up here I've gotta ask: what illegal activity are drawings of a paddle or mask or "lube"/slippy gel, or any of the others, promoting? Because this analogy feels like apples to oranges. And if that's the rubric then we have the slippery slope of what about violence "promoting" items, such as blood splatters, stabbing, guns, etc. If the mere presence of an item is considered promoting it enough to warrant comparing it/calling it a taboo for the site (which I don't agree with, I think acknowledging something exists and promoting it are different) then where is that line drawn? (which circles back to "what makes this promoting illegal activity?")

Which, all in all, is a moot point because same as staff approved your story they approved these items.

Honestly this feels a bit like grasping at straws.

Why is everyone even calling the slippy gels lube? Massage oils anyone? That was my assumption until I started reading the comments. Honestly can we please stop flogging this dead horse? Yes, everyone has a right to state their opinion, and you have. No one is going to change their opinions at this point. Staff has made their position clear. Let's just bury this snipe fest, shall we? Please?

At this point, it feels like you're using other users' trauma and hurt regarding the items to bolster your argument for why staff should give you (items that cost) real world money. Is that genuine compassion?

Like, I'll give you the benefit of the doubt here and assume you really do care about the well-being of those users, but I just don't think it's appropriate to ask for monetary compensation for something that doesn't seem to have personally triggered you.

I put it in quotes just because that's what everyone is calling them tbh-- I didn't consider that until I saw others saying it, fwiw. /shrug

That's what's rubbed me the wrong way about this thread/why I even bothered to comment to begin with. (Steering well clear of that particular news post though aha) Regardless of how I or others feel about the items it just gives me a pause to see someone using other people's emotions and experiences as part of their argument for goodies.

Incidentally, the person the OP is trying to use to defend this whole mess went on to comment later on the news post that they have absolutely no problem with Subeta having kink-based items in general and that it's just unfortunate that some of this batch happened to hit their specific trigger. Pretty certain they do not share OP's views and don't want to be used like this.

Probably time for a mod to lock this thread before it gets any worse.