Granted, but you stare at your computer for so long that your eyes melt and you get serious carpal tunnel that renders you unable to perform everyday functions.

I wish my abs would tone themselves.

granted, but they exploded out of control and now you look like an exercise freak. I wish my goats would actually eat the wild plants in their pen instead of begging for a whole bale of hay every five seconds

Congrads! Your goats just ate the all wild plants in their pen, and also the pen itself, all of your grass, the leaves out of your trees, some of the walls from your house, the leftover pizza you left on the fridge and the neighbors cat.

Edit: oops! forgot to make a wish! I wish... for an A in my exams next week.

XDDDDDD You got an A! But then you became so obsessed with grades that it took over your life and you lost your friends and family! :O I wish I had sorbet right now.

you will! But then it will melt in to gooooooo

I wish global warmining would stop

It does, but then a new ice age begins, and the world freezes over! I wish my cat knew how to do backflips

granted, but your cat backflips even in it's sleep, and it refuses to get off your bed at 3am. That darn cat just loves the bouncy effect your bed has at 3am.

I wish I could see a double rainbow.

Granted, but it's animated.

I wish I didn't have an eating disorder...

Granted- instead you have Crohns.

I wish... that I didn't need to get a state ID to get into collage.... and that I already got my driver license....

Granted but you back into your parents garage and total the car. D:

I wish my flu would get better.

Granted, your flu retreats...but mutates into a flesh eating bacteria.

I wish my wishes were unlimited!

Granted, but everything you wish for gets twisted in a bad way.

I wish I didn't have a flesh eating bacteria! :P

Granted, but you do have an STD instead. I wish I could win at everything

: Granted, but you also win at losing at everything :P I wish I could make some super awesome friends that would stay super awesome :P

Granted: but you suddendly have to move far away I wish I didnt have summer reading assignments > <

ganted, but then you have to read and finish all the books for one night's worth of homework. I wish i could go to Disney World!

Granted, but just as you arrive, it closes. I wish I had the best job in the world!

Granted, but it requires a blood pact.

I wish I had a PS3.

Granted but it turns into a transformer and kills you.

I wish I had more muscle

Granted, but with the increase in muscle, there's a loss of self control, causing you to damage and break everything around you.

I wish I was a game developer working for Valve.