I found another good song that dropped just yesterday apparently https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DcEpndGrkp4

"And that's all pretty much just a consequence of me not being to what I consider to be society's sins," Should be "And that's all pretty much just a consequence of me not BENDING to what I consider to be society's sins,"

I know I got some eggs from the Ghost/Halloween Blake opponent in the Battle arena. For some reason I am wondering if there is indeed a level cap on them, or if I'm thinking of a different item. It does sound vaguely familiar, I just don't remember seeing that condition on the item last time I used it. Part of me is wondering if I should use them on my main battler, because even if it gives 1 point to each stat, it's technically more bang for your buck than using it on a low level pet, even though that is exactly what I did (I want dat nightmare Zasaba to be a stronk bug). I'll probably investigate that today. I did some achingly slow battling last night when I was bored.

Just yesterday, there was a particular fish sandwich I was compelled to vault lol. That's thing thing about having signed up years ago, but having some long breaks, it means there's always an item I haven't seen yet, that while just a normal item ends up standing out to me because I haven't seen it a hundred times. Subeta has definitely made me feel hungry before. It's like when youtube decides to start shilling me Japanese food videos, I have to look away or else it's just torture seeing all the wonderful foods and yet having no moniez to buy the real good foods lol.

Oh dang so you're basically like working graveyards, and going to sleep when I do as a nocturnal unemployed schizophrenic! I couldn't manage to work graveyards (Even if I stay up by choice while unemployed), perhaps largely due to my family having zero consideration at all for such a schedule. It was the worst thing in the world to come downstairs to get ready to leave for a job (And also to try and line up sleep during the day) and see my dad sitting on the couch drinking in party mode and my brother too. Sometimes just seeing them all happy and active in the afternoons pisses me off because they don't even exist in the AM most of the time and it gives me this defeatist/hypocrite vibe. I remember telling my dad I didn't want things to become like Charlie and the Chocolate Factory while in tears, and inevitably, things really did become like that where my family just stays in bed sulking all day, but then as soon as it's time for jordy to order some fattening fast food, or my dad to get up and drink, smoke, toke, and watch politics, then they're all active and shit. Meanwhile I'm usually up having a nice calm serene morning, but they're never there to join me or enliven the house, and are almost always in a shit mood. Bah, gripes.

Emulator is a good thing to have for sure. I really regret getting rid of any of my game consoles at all. I really thought that I was gonna become an adult and move on to bigger and better hobbies, but then Covid kind of ended my world and my Real Adult arc. Good to have the emulator though, seems to be only fair and true justice, that those classic Golden Age of Gaming games remain basically free to the public now that the young generation is no longer interested in them due to everything being ADHD hyper-brain rot now. It's like, at least the powers that be haven't rewritten the past by making these little joys inaccessible. Honestly I am surprised. If I were the evil government and wanted to make sure my citizens were good slaves who ate my slop, I'd find a way to destroy the emulator sites with legal action and such. I'm surprised. But then, I have over 100 of them saved on a separate device like an archive, and I imagine many others do too so maybe it would be a futile effort on the government's part. I dunno. Of course it's all probably very mundane, I'm just seething, even about good things.

That's been a theme lately, seething about good things, mostly because when those good things are trying to manifest while I see the rest of the world covered in evil it seems really jarring and hypocritical. Like if you saw someone enjoying an ice cream cone next to someone getting skinned alive and that ice-cream eater was shouting "I love life! Everything is wonderful!" I am such a bitter bastard lol.

Well, in regards to the crush thing, it's not the most comforting but you're certainly not alone! I read a lot about people going through similar things these days. I don't think it's %100 on you, I think it's subliminally baked into the culture to end up thinking about these things. There was more dissuasion, distraction, and practical redirection of attention in the olden days if you ask me. Nowadays, everything leans towards the idea of romantic trade ups, affairs, cuckoldry, etc etc etc. All in all, not so much wrong with you, lots wrong with society that it even puts us in these positions. I've really had to do some mental gymnastics myself these days to weave a consistent view of my world and myself. I've really waded into some dark waters regarding sexuality and love and all that. I think the powers that be poisoned us to be like this on purpose, but there's nothing we can do about it. I mean, after 9 years in the relationship, with no big upward movements in life (Buying house, having children, buying a pet, big vacation- White Picket Fence type things) things probably start to get a little boring and you look for any exciting changes whatsoever. I can't speak accurately or knowingly about your partner, but just from the general gist of society, I see that men are really not able to conduct the magic they used to be able to to make relationships thrive for a long time. Men have become more like the Women in society, so now it's all kind of a sexuality and looks game, hence my doomerism about getting older myself. I have nothing to offer women, and really I never have, being cheated on or left as many times as I have been. They always get bored or find a guy who has more in terms of looks, money, or penis. I dunno. I'm trying to add to the convo, but admittedly, I couldn't have much to add that probably helps. I'm basically resigned to being an incel myself. Society has labelled me a gay man, a transgender, a criminal, an incel, a nazi. And that's all pretty much just a consequence of me not being to what I consider to be society's sins, though I'm not religious any more like I was for that brief period of covid delirium. And I spend my days dressing up my female avatars in between watching interracial cuck porn and attending bail check ins for my violent past and homeless future, so truly, I am devoid of any good answers. I have bad answers though! Lmao. Ah, I'll leave it there for now.

Time to doomscroll youtube some more and stenchmaxx B-)

Funny enough, the first virus I did this year was the Pleasure one that turns you into yet another pink gooey blob, so I know what you mean.

THEY GET THE RESORT. Lmao, so true. I love when I creep other people's profiles and see they also have slots filled to the max, but only the top pets have much going on the rest are, as expected, and just like mine, pretty untouched. Granted I have been pretty consistent so far with giving them 1 point training sessions each time so they're not at ground zero per se.

Oh yeah I did get one of those eggs I believe. But yeah it's just such a massive investment. Something that, if the site were in a more stable place, would probably benefit from some reworks. There's gonna be a lot of enemies in the battle system I'll probably never fight just cause they have to compensate for the, what, 18 years of people buffing their main fighter lmao.

Yeah I ended up seeing where I found it too of course it was in the forum shop lol.

Yeah I was up late myself. Not good considering I have to be daytime-awake for bail the day after tomorrow. We'll see if I can fix it or if I go into bail sleep deprived and delirious once more. Would be about the 5th or 6th time lol. I really enjoyed watching a bunch of game streams though, might crack another one open today. It actually made me fire up the emulator too and before you knew it I had played like a solid hour of fucking "Tak and the power of Juju" and played some Jet Force Gemini myself too see how hard it is (It's fucking crazy hard and such an old janky game we were troopers back in the day).

Now youtube is showing me a bunch of game content but the algorithm can't figure out (Or is trying to agitate me) that there's a difference between watching a 2009 youtuber play JFG and watching some vtuber play a newslop game. Ah well.

I did try and watch Raymond the Doomer today, but as soon as I heard his voice and saw his guest, I felt nauseous lmao. I don't think I'm going to be watching anymore of Raymond's channel though my heart goes out to another bald doomer. I got my own nightmare to fail at solving.

Sticking to semi-positive videos today because the weather is nice and I just can't take any more doomerism than my own (Which certainly will continue, undoubtedly, I never tire of my OWN bullshit lol). So probably music videos and streams all day today. Good enough for such a world as this!

Hope you had a good sleep too! :)

I am so sorry for all these spams I'm too stoned to hold back sharing. One more thing! "Breaking the glass Hymen with my Nintendo Cumble Pack. Jet Force Gemini. Jet Set Radio." Not a sequence of words I ever thought I'd hear but the stream delivered.