dont read this if descriptions of anxiety or depression may trigger you

i have panic attacks and wake up every morning anxious. i have to take something (valium or propanoral) for it everyday. i have to excercise every day. i have to distract myself constantly. im so tired of it. i feel completely alone and incapable of getting better. and when i have any sort of break from anxiety, im depressed. i have a psychiatrist and i have a therapist. i got my meds increased but im still waiting for it to POSSIBLY work. its a mood stabilizer and wont necessarily help but she wants to increase it before adding other medication in case it does. im doing everything i can but im so tired and just want it to get better already. its stressing my support system too. they are tired and scared. i dont think theres any advice i havent heard, but im open to any. i just need to vent and feel like im actually being heard as well. thanks for letting me plaster my baggage on subeta lol

I feel you. I had a really bad 3 month period shortly after I had my daughter. I wasn't on medication though because again just had a baby at the time. What helped me was writing. Just a shit ton of writing both like on a computer and in a notebook. Whenever I got anxious I would just write in some form and then come back later and edit it. I would like do commentary on my venting and for me it seemed to help me put things into perspective. I had a therapist, she was great until she left. I still resort to writing now like a daily journal. Haven't had any panic attacks in almost 2 years now but yeah it totally sucks. I hope they find a good combo and you get some relief!

OMG! i feel you! And sorry, this will be long.

I used to drink 4 cups of coffee per day and had no anxiety, nothing. Then, in '16 i had 2 awful traditional jobs, and at the 2nd one i had a breakdown, then i quit after a month or so. I was exhausted and this is why i quit. During this 2nd awful job i managed to quit drinking coffee. Some time passed, and i started drinking again - i missed the taste, right? lol but i promised myself i'd only drink 1 cup/day. And i did it. What i didn't know is that i was left with something after that mental breakdown, and in time it turned into depression and anxiety. The anxiety increased when i was doing/supposed to do certain things (ie talking to my mother -_-). I also suffered from pretty bad mood swings. i got these under control with magnesium.

Fast forward to last year when my fiance couldnt take it anymore and would give me some xanax (taken from their mom who has a prescription). I'd take it only in emergencies or when i couldn't sleep.

Well, this year i started seeing a therapist and she made me take xanax as treatment, every day. My mood improved greatly. I was taking both xanax (0.25 mg in the morning and 0.25 in the evening) and magnesium. And after a couple off weeks i started feeling .... HAPPY! well, maybe not happy-happy, but much better than i felt in a VERY long time.

I had a period when i ran out of xanax (therapist gave me the wrong dose, so i finished it too soon >.>) and fiance's mom gave me some Valium (she has many issues and needs many meds). I took a quarter in the evening. any more than that and i was floating in my head. well, i think it was too strong for me. but it kept me in check. Plus, i need to sleep well, and valium helped me sleep decently well.

I also started drinking decaf coffee. Currently, i rarely feel anxious anymore.

It sounds like Valium is not good for you. Maybe ask for Xanax instead? Or you could also take magnesium. Thankfully, this one doesn't need prescription, as far as i know. But make sure not to take more than 1 pill a day as it has bad side effects that you don't want, like very weak and very dizzy, that you can barely make it to the bathroom. You could see improvements in about a week or 2.

I hope you can get better soon. /virtual hugs. everything will be ok, you'll get better.

thanks for sharing <3 i write too, it is helpful. its really nice to hear that there are people who it goes away for. ive had periods of relief but then it comes back. im glad youre better now <3

ugh i feel you i used to love coffee, now i cant even have green tea because of the caffeine. ive tried xanax and ativan and valium is best because it doesnt reduce my appetite as much as ativan and xanax leaves my body too fast. i wish i could take it every day though my psych literally gave me 4 tabs and thats it :( anyway thanks so much for answering and giving me some hope

Well I am pregnant again so I do worry it may come back when I deliver. I was diagnosed with post partum anxiety and not post partum depression. So we shall see. But this time I will be better prepared. Another thing is ACT therapy acceptance commitment therapy. I like "A liberated mind" it's a book. There are a few others though.

Yes, jeez, doc, 4 pills will be VERY helpful for a whole month -____- /sarcasm. Sorry, i couldn't help it. Mostly because I'm still pissed at my therapist who gave me 30 pills of 0.25 mg of xanax (so for a month), but considering i first took 0.5mg/day at first, what she gave wasn't going to be enough unless i skipped it either int he day or the evening. Thankfully, since i realized i have troubles sleeping, i also bought melatonin too, so i could take that in the evening, and xanax in the am. And like i said i also had some valium to stretch the xanax. I noticed Xanax is just better for me.

I'm currently thinking about changing the therapist, mostly because of this mistake. but we'll see. Is there any way you could change your therapist? Or maybe the next time you (can) go to insist that the anxiety is crippling you and that you simply can't function? You'd also have to explain that you're aware that nothing bad is really going to happen or that the chances are minimal.

So, yeah, do know you're not alone in this. i wish you all the best.

Thank you both so much and sorry for the late response, I couldn't get the forums to load! Sites bugging out since the updates. I'm doing better now. I appreciate the advice. Hope you're both well too! :)

I'm happy to hear you're doing better now. Don't be scared to come back here when you feel the need - sometimes just letting the thoughts out (as an anon) is helpful. Stay safe and strong, things will get better!

Same here. We should privately chat about it sometime.

I have been battling panic anxiety disorder and PTSD for a long time, and the pandemic made it worse. My doctor prescribed me Lexapro, and I started therapy. Just when I thought things were getting better, I started getting heart palpitations. These were likely a result of the Lexapro, and my doctor told me that I am likely to have issues with other SSRI medications. Right now, the best I can do is manage my anxiety with Hydroxyzine. It's better than nothing. It is frustrating trying one thing after another, but it gets better. I know that there are other options out there, and I haven't given up hope of trying different things until I find what works for me. I wish everyone the best of luck on their journeys with anxiety management.

Oof, that sucks with the lexapro. Propanoral is a beta blocker that helped me with my anxiety a lot. It basically just slows your heart down so it stops physical symptoms of anxiety. Could be worth trying since it's just take as needed so there's no need to taper off or anything. I'm glad you're not giving up, and thanks for sharing.

Panic disorder management https://fpnotebook.com/Psych/Anxiety/PncDsrdrMngmnt.htm

non-pharmacologic management https://fpnotebook.com/Psych/Anxiety/AnxtyNnPhrmclgcMngmnt.htm

you can also look up individual meds on this website. wine and music gladden the heart, but the love of wisdom is better than both

Anxiety has been a struggle for as long as I can remember. Medication helps, but sometimes it's tough.