Your Favorite Joke
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If you were asked on the spot "what is your favorite joke?" what would your first response be?
I have no idea why, but this one always gets me (it's not even good, so idk why):
xD
My favorite joke is this beautifully crafted phrase from a college term paper, dealing with the Bubonic plague.
"In some villages the death toll exceeded 100%"
Such a lapse of common sense!
I got a few I like to say. What happened when the butcher backed up into his meat grinder? he got a little behind in his work.
ok so i don’t like this joke at all, in fact i might hate it, but every time i hear i just gets me. it’s stupid...
two pretzels were walking down the street ... one was... assaulted...
i-i hate this dumb joke but it’s funny???
A man walks into a bar.
And says 'ouch'.
"They call me the collector of monsters."
I look in a mirror, and despite my disgust at the T-600 there. Some waif (No doubt a bloody dexter.) is going to see that, and say "That's him, my sinister guy."
Could there be a more cheap shot than that?
a human with a guitar on a stage bounces sound off the walls and back to the audience. a pigeon on stage does not. why? a coo sticks
rec me good webcomics plssss
Which country’s capital has the fastest-growing population?
Ireland. Every day it’s Dublin. :D
[Flower=Lydiah] -Can bite for Butterfly Bruise
I thought I was just gonna lurk in this thread but I laughed out loud at that joke and you needed to know XD
My all time favorite joke is that episode of corner gas, where the wind blows the "cafe" sign off the roof, and they are running around looking for the letters. Some kids are standing on oscar's lawn with the 'f', and he comes out of the house yelling, "Hey! Kids! Get the 'F' off my lawn!"
You can take one man's trash to another man's treasure but you can't make him drink it
Musing Query: Have you ever heard the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the wise?
The way to a bad friend´s is crooked and far, though he lives by the road But the paths lie direct to a good friend´s, though he is far away.
I don't know if it's my favorite joke ever (I've heard a lot of jokes and it's hard to make me laugh), but it's a recent one that keeps sticking out in my mind:
What's red and smells like blue paint?
Red paint.
I have three jokes which I know by heart, I should probably update my inventory but these still make me smirk after all this time so I think they're still good.
What's blue and doesn't fit? SPOILER (click to toggle)
dead epileptic
Two women walk into a bar, one says to the other "have you heard about the Bechdel test?" And the other replies with "I think my boyfriend Ryan was telling me about this the other day."
Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff SPOILER (click to toggle)
ba-dum-dum tish
Zombie Rrraw
Air Head : Angler : Ant Agony : Barnankles : Blistered Hearts : Brainrot : Bright Bite : Butterfly Bruise : Buzzkill : Clusterflux : Creeping : Cryomorph : Crystalitis : Death Slug : Doom Bloom : Eau De Ceased : Fevermore : Grosseries : Grossfungus : Ikupox : Lobster Face : Lotus : Love Bug : Metalmorphosis : Pinkie Patch : Sickura : The Vapours : Yggdrakill
Seeking
It's hard to find good jokes that aren't trying too hard (or innuendos...or hiding microaggressions).
Made me snicker Mentioned for unexpected yet simple answer... :D
What did the busy doctor say to the angry dwarf?
"I'm sorry, sir, but you're going to have to be a little patient."
[tot=Ekhal] [egg=Ekhal] [tp=Ekhal]
"Tried to catch some fog this morning. Mist."
"Want some salt on that?" "Na"
Saw one a couple of days ago on Twitter: Wife: We're out of salt. Me: 0mg
<p>"In some villages the death toll exceeded 100%"</p>
<p>Such a lapse of common sense!
a pigeon on stage does not.
why?
a coo sticks
I'm studying automotive technology, and this is relevant.
What's the difference between a heart surgeon and car mechanic?
A car's engine can't be fixed while its running.
