I need a profile for

I have a basic theme i'm going for...see profile...i just need someone with an artistic ability to make it not look like a 2 yr old slopped stuff together and code it :).

Please share some samples, cost, and timeline. Can pay in sP or CSC and I no real budget restriction - market for equivalent profiles.

Let me know if you need more details or specifics :). Basically Nicole Richie meets Zelda Ocarina of Time n64 edition Great Fairy plagerized theme :D....maybe get a little crazy and toss in some euclid