So, My ex/bestfriend is in love with his highschool sweet heart. She doesn't respond to his messages unless shes lonely or sad She has a child Shes 17. Hes 21. Normally this wouldn't be cool at all but they've already dated for 2 years in high school so...Its different? Ether way, shes just putting him on the backburner. Hes been told by a few of his friends she has another man. And its just like.. He told me he feels like no ones on his side so i wanna be supportive but... Its fucked up. Shes just fucking with him. And its not like he even started this. Shes the one that invited him over and kissed him and said she wanted to be a thing again. They're not even official. Its just dumb and stressful. I'm worried for him. Hes already depressed for other reasons. I just don't know what to say or do anymore.

First off, this is just a sucky situation all around. Secondly, it's important to remember that you cannot control someone else's actions; you can talk to him and suggest that he drop this girl asap because she's not good for him, but you can't force him to do it.

Now with that being said, I do believe in tough love in situations like this. I believe in being up front, telling him that this girl is bad news and it's in his best interest to dump her and cut all contact and just throw her out of his life as fast as possible. I've been through situations with people like this girl you're describing, and they are so toxic it's better to just cut them off and stop the drama before it can begin or go any further, and I think a lot of problems with toxic individuals like that can be solved by cutting contact with the toxic individual and if people weren't so afraid of the fallout or whatever they'd be happier. I do not allow toxic individuals in my life, be they friendships or online people; there are people I've even blocked before I've had any contact based on things I've seen that they've posted because I know contact is just going to introduce that toxicity into my life and I want to prevent that as much as possible.

So really, the best way you can 'help' is to tell this guy to dump the girl and move on with his life and never contact her or look back again. If he's unwilling to listen to you or other friends remember that you cannot control his actions, as much as you may wish to be able to do so. And remember that if it gets too bad and starts bleeding over into you because of it you are also free to walk away from him. Do what's best for you, and if his refusal to let go of her starts to affect you then you have to take into consideration walking away and moving on with your own life.

Honestly I'm just worried for his well being. Its not leaching into my life or anything. Just frustrating cuz theirs nothing I can do. Its just shitty. I already told him shes bad news and hes not willing to let her go. And thats fine, its his choice. It just sucks to know hes hurting, if that makes sense. And its like, I know its not true but i feel like a shit friend in the sense i cant do anything to help besides be there as a shoulder to cry on or an ear to complain to.

It does suck, but if you've already tried and he's not willing to change you can't let that drag you down. Don't feel bad because you can't help him, especially if you're doing all you can within the limits of your relationship to him.