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Apr 14, 2017 8 years ago
Bliss
will always bounce back
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I have a very badly written story (I wrote it when I was 19 or 20) that I'd like to get re-written. If someone can help me out, that'd be very much appreciated! Please post samples and prices.


🌹 Beloved Brother 1989-2018 (10/17 - 02/19)
Grammy 1937-2021 (11/14-10/28) 👼

Apr 15, 2017 8 years ago
tendril
needs to get lost
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Coire

thank you for thinking of me! I'm not going to be doing commissions for the foreseen future though, sorry :c


Apr 17, 2017 8 years ago
Star Captain
Sparrow_647
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Sandy Claws

Thank you for thinking of me! <3 A story re-write sounds great! I will have a bit of time to work on it during the evenings this week, and we can get together on the details of pricing/payment once I have finished with it.

"a man who procrastinates in his choosing will inevitably have his choices made for him by circumstance"-
hunter s. thompson

[tot=Sparrow]

May 12, 2017 8 years ago
The cards were stacked against
gryphongrl
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Mollie

I don't really have samples or prices, but I can give it a try. I would like to get into writing, but haven't. I did my own pets' profiles. Nikalo's story is done.

Tried it just for fun and practice. If you like it I can do a final check for tenses and grammar and such. If you don't like it no big deal I was just trying.

SPOILER (click to toggle) In 1823 at the age of 15 Edrick was drafted into the Spanish Civil War. Many years of fighting passed and the young man became older and fell in love. Annabelle, sweet Annabelle. Every three nights he would sneak off from his posting to meet his Annabelle in the local cemetery. A break from the blasts, the orders, the smell, and the noise their passion was his escape. Edrick wasn't free even then, without him knowing his horrible General was watching and waiting. One night Edrick arrived at the cemetery and Annabelle was not there waiting for him. He searched frantically while his heart leaped in his chest.

"Looking for something?" The General's voice came from a shadow.

Edrick turned toward the voice drawing his gun and there was his Annabelle in the hands of his terrible General. His lovely, sweet Annabelle with her face contorted in fear and covered in tears.

"Let her go!" Edrick demanded.

The General bared his fangs in a wicked grin. Edrick grew cold.

"Let her go," Edrick pleaded. "I'd do anything for her!"

"Anything?" The General leered.

"Yes," Edrick nearly whispered.

The General moved quickly and Annabelle screamed as she tumbled to the ground.

"Foolish mortal..." The General's voice came from behind as Eldrick felt teeth sink into the flesh of his neck. His fingered went numb and his gun tumbled to the ground unused as the life drained from his body.

"Tonight you will become a vampire. You will never get to see your family or friends again. Your galant sacrifice is nothing." The General gloated as Eldrick's world sank into darkness, yet another victim to the night.

Eldrick awoke starving. He tried to sate the hunger with bread, mutton, grapes, wine. No, blood was the only thing that satisfied his hunger and sustained his unnatural life. He adapted to his need for blood, but never lost his longing for human food which now tasted like ash in his mouth. Dreams of again falling in love haunt his days, but seem as hopeless as tasting food again. For now revenge will have to do. Days are spent dreaming of killing his maker, but how to really do it? At least the fantasy of revenge and a hope for someday having love again keep Eldrick from going cold inside. Keep him from being like the General and his ilk.

It has been 100 years since his master released him from servitude now only dropping by for the occasional favor. Eldrick questioned why his maker hadn't just killed him. There used to be light. There used to be love. Day by day he sits like a clock that has stopped ticking, long forgotten and dusty. He tried to remain human. He let Annabelle go and fall in love with another. He watched over her family for generations as they aged and died along with all he knew and loved. The years showed Eldrick one of the reasons why his fellow vampires might be so cold and robotic. Loss after loss, kill after kill became numbing, but he held onto the memory of teeth on the flesh of Annabelle and the passionate love they shared. Even though alone that spark of remembered humanity kept him from the soulless fate of his fellow vampires. He cared.

A chilling neigh broke into Eldrick's contemplations. His only friend had returned. Knocking over a brass oil lamp in his haste Eldrick threw open the door.

"Where have you been for the last 50 years? I missed you."

A black stallion with blazing red eyes stood before him, lowered his head and rested his nose in Eldrick's hand. Bonded by blood and battle the horse had passed through this strange afterlife along with his rider. With that simple touch the horse withdrew nickering and faded back into the night. Alone again Eldrick knew that at least he had one friend. His horse had felt the chill closing in on Eldrick's heart and come to save him once again.

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