I have noticed that when I go out with men/women, they are very hesitant to date me, or even agree to a date. I have had sex and a guy who didnt care about the disability, but I would like subeta to shed light on this.

I know it can be intimidating, but honestly I'd like to know why it is, and maybe how to market myself or play off the disability per se?

Mainly I think it's a mix of not really knowing how to deal with it and being a little worried about saying something completely insensitive. That's all I can think of that'd make it intimidating.

My dad recently lost his leg and he's in a wheelchair for right now til he gets used to the prosthesis. I'm still having trouble with that. I never know what to help him with and what to let him do himself. I can't imagine dating someone who was in a wheelchair because...I'd -keep- them offended.

well, people usually think that having a disability means that you have to be treated differently than everyone else and most don't know how to actually 'face' it/deal with it

i myself wouldn't think twice about dating a disabled person if i like you, and you like me, of course i'd date you i might poke a bit about your disability, just to see if there are some things that i can't do, and that would be it oh, and i'd be extremely protective if someone should bash or talk nasty things about you c:

Ooh! Fellow Neopian! waves

My advice... just be yourself. That's the best way to find someone who really likes you for who you are. I think it would also be a good idea to be very open and confident about yourself, and educate others on what kind of disability you have, what you can/can't do, how it affects you, etc. If you appear nervous about that type of thing, I'm sure it will make everyone else uncomfortable with it as well... so just be comfortable about who you are, and it should make the people around you feel better about it as well.

Other than that... all I know how to say is good luck. If someone's going to deny you because you have a disability, then they're not worth your time. The people who are worth it are the ones who accept you for who you are regardless of a disability, and will support you and care for you and treat you the way you deserve to be treated. =)

I think some disabilities are ... easier to brush off as "So what if you have this or that" than others.

I have 'very' bad vision, and that's honestly part of the reason I am choosing to stay single right now (That, and I love having a bed to myself) because I know what is coming for me, and I don't feel it's ... fair ... to ask someone else to give up a lot of their freedom and have a disabled partner that eventually will be fully blind. Glaucoma ftl. That, plus I'm PAINFULLY self conscious when I'm at home and not wearing my contacts. I 'hate' my "at home" glasses.

It's a tough situation to be in, but the best I can say is sometimes people van be jerks, there's no getting around it, but sometimes ... you can find someone who really DOESN'T care ad would consider you a treasure ot have.

Honesty is the best thing I can suggest. Just set it there and ... that's what it is. Look, I'm like this. It's not a big deal to me, get over it. Someone very well may be just able to go, Yeah, ok. So you want to go to the bar first, or should we just hit the theater ? And when you find them, you both are lucky.

Waves to jazzeh

Thank you everyone. I know I will eventually find someone, its just rifling through the crap before I find the gold. It always makes me lose a little faith in humanity though when the only reason they dont want to be with me is because of the wheelchair. I even had one good guy friend say that the only reason we aren't fooling around is because he didn't want "to break me" and honestly, that really hurt. I know I will find someone, as there is someone for everyone, but its just taking longer for me it seems.

On the bright side, look at what you get ot enjoy.

1. the bed to MYSELF
2. no one else complaining I'm hogging the blankets
3. No one bitching i don't hve supper done at x time every day
4. I don't have to get dressed if I don't want to (Jammy day ftw.)
5. I don't have to tell you to gtfo my house to get some peace and quiet.

Sure, oh, it'd be nice to have someone around to spend time with and canoodle like wild bunnies and all but ... 'shrugs'.

I love my single life. But I am reaching that age where I feel my clock ticking and time to settle down and stuff.

The title of this got my attention.

I think that being yourself is really important, I know its easier said then done as alot of ppl suffer from anxieties, ocd, just to name a few and society doesnt seem to make it any easier when we are outside of 'normal'.

The good thing about being different is that you are unique and there really isnt anyone else like you. be proud of who you are, be proud to have differences and dont let anyone else tell you otherwise.

I care for someone who cannot speak, is autistic, wheelchair bound, with muscular dystrophy, hearing and visual difficulties - and it doesnt stop them from having a relationship, living life to the fullest and cherishing every moment they can --

I think we all hear that ticking clock at some stage, try not to focus too much on it ok and look forward to the possibilities life can bring you

Keep smiling. ^^

I know what you mean about the ticking clock, but it, for me, still comes down to I feel it's not fair to someone to ask them to take on ... someone like me, and I don't want them to be with me out of some sense of pity, either. Some of it stems from my mom, who is permanently blind, and what a drain she is on everyone around her, I am flat out terrified that this is what it's like.

This may come off as really, really stupid, but... I think there are websites for people who want to connect with kindred souls, or people who are willing to try for love, no matter the disability? I feel ignorant, because I can't remember the name of the website I once knew, and a casual Google search comes up with some extremely sketchy possibilities.

A friend of mine came back from Iraq, after he had lost his arm. He met an amazing, wonderful, kind, understanding girl on an online dating site, exclusively for other disabled people, and open-minded, open-hearted people who can see beyond physical imperfections. They got married last fall, and everyone could tell, she genuinely cared about his unique needs.

I have no idea if this is your thing... if meeting someone online is feasible to you. But judging from how happy my friend is, when he mourned for months about how no woman would ever love him, because of his arm... Its worth a shot. :3

Yes, there could be paralysis and amputee fetishists stalking some of the less reputable sites out there, but a smart person can easily weed out the pervs, and maybe, just maybe, your soulmate is out there?

Uh... my boyfriend has cerebral palsy, if that counts? o_o It's not a severe case but it's quite noticeable. He cracks jokes about it all the time and it used to horrify me, but I'm used to it now. As for the disability itself, I don't really notice it myself.

I am a member of some sites but usually I get the pervs lol. I just needed to vent I think, and get an insight from a able bodied person. I am also very afraid of placing a burden on someone but if they loved me, I hope they wouldnt see it that way.

Mariah61497 - Dude, wtf? Seriously? .... ._.

Anyway!!

I've read everything that everyones said.. And personally, I'm disabled as well. I have a mild case of Cerebral Palsy and my twin brother who passed away had Down Syndrome. I think, of course, you'll find someone. You just can't be looking. That's how it happens, you know? They just find you. You'll be with someone and be happy soon enough. I read you said your clock is ticking.. But.. Just think positive. Never get down over anything in your life. It's the 'Secret' you know.. :3 Have you ever heard of 'The Secret'.. It's law of attraction. Think positive, dream it, and see yourself reaching that goal of finding your soul mate.. And it will happen. Then all this time you've been waiting will be worth it. ❤️