You were friends with a guy for a little over a year (over the internet). You guys spoke EVERY day of that year. So you're both really close to each other. He knows everything about you pretty much. Minus very personal info.

then you find that this guy has a wife and two kids that he never told you about! And that whole year he was acting like he was single and spoke about some of the chicks he was with and what not. On top of this, the guy isn't aware that you know about his wife and kids

haha what would you do in this situation? Not really looking for advice..just conversation.

I'd...well,I'd confront him about it. I'd make it into this really emotional thing, and demand answers from him. I'd probably block him for a while, to let the anger and hurt die down, then I'd maybe unblock him and try to start over (this depends on how well our talk went)

I'd block his sorry ass and never speak to him again.

It's disturbing how many times similar situations have happened to my friends and even to myself, both online and in real life. Looking back on all of them, the best solution by far is to permanently cut them loose and forget that they exist, and if it's an internet thing that's pretty damn simple to do :P

Pffffh by what he sounds like I bet he has more kids then he knows.

Just like Arya said. Block his sorry ass.

What if he was completely up front about having a Mrs and 2 kids and you and he had no intention of breaking up his family but you did all that sharing n caring stuff ??

Cause that's where I am, heh. This was just 'awfully' eerie to read and it being similar, except I know all about mrs and kidlets. Who are great kidlets.

Weird....

See..I would never block him. i like talking to him too much. And to be honest, I don't care that he has kids and a wife. Only thing that bothers me is that he hides that part of his life. I wanna know what his kids are like, i wanna know what his wife is like. You know?

and Raz, eeekkk. That sounds bad. My one friend had a thing like that happen with her. Married guy, doesn't wanna be married..wants to be with her. But his current wife is an emotionless bitch so i guess that's kind of understandable that he doesn't want her anymore..

Er, no. We're not breaking up his marriage. Ohno. That is simply NOT happening. Never ever.

And, it simply could be that he is choosing to keep his family life private from his online life. The only thing I would object to is if he was leading you on in a relationship and was giving you false hope of a future together. THAT I would have to say what is wrong w/ him for.

And even if his Mrs. is an emotionless bitch, you don't want to be in the situation as other woman, perceived or not, truth or not. It's NOT a happy place, even if you are SO not a threat. For Pete's sake. Still, she probably is going to feel betrayed that he is emotionally closer to someone else. That's still a betrayal.

Even though you object I would really break it off with him. I mean, at least in the way you put it, he was HIDING it, not just "not putting it out there"

I mean, the point is he was lying to you that whole time. Not just "not mentioning it."

In my opinion, I'd be mad but it's what you think that matters.

Ahhh no. He's never made it seem like there would be anything like that between us. We are strickly friends and will always be that way. That's why I don't mind it really. Now if he had been talking about a life together..haha I'd be pissed.

And yeah, My friend has since broken it off with the guy. She knew she didn't want to be in that position

Good thing you are just friends - but it's still a concern that he lied, if he made it sound like he was single. Confront him. It's maybe not common to mention in the first conversations that you're married and whatnot, but after a year? That's a bit weak, in my opinion. Why would he need to act like he was single? Does he have problems with his wife that causes him to act like someone else online?

I'm not sure on his relationship with his wife..I'm assuming it is a decent relationship since he's still with her. He's not the kind of guy that would keep someone in his life he didn't like (no less have two kids with her haha). I think his deal is that he just likes having two different lives. One where he is married and had kids and one where he is free to do whatever he wants.

Another reason why i don't want to confront him is because if have a feeling that if I do, he'll be gone. He won't get online anymore, and if he does it will be under a different name. He'd be creeped out by the fact that I know. I wouldn't want to lose him over something that doesn't REEAALLLY matter. Since it's been a year and there hasn't been any complications so far, so it must not be that essential of a thing to know.

The lies worry me, a lot. Men (and women) who lie like that don't tend to be very honest in general, even when you think that they are an honest person. He's lying to you, to his wife, to his kids and to himself, and that's not healthy. And if honesty is going to make him bail on you or change his name and make up a third "life" for himself, that's even worse, at least to me.

I can't get into details, but everything you've said is setting off the same alarm bells I tried to ignore in a situation of my own a few years back. It seemed so innocent, and turned into such a nightmare, especially for one of my close friends who was also involved.

All I can really say is just be careful. Very careful.

Thanks Arya (: I'm just going to let things be for now, and eventually..I'll bring it up. When it feels right.

It's best not to get attached to people you talk to on line because you really don't know anything about them. Talk to this guy if you want, but don't make the mistake of thinking he's a close friend. A lot of people use the computer as an escape to do and be whatever they want. To live a separate life from reality. This is probably just a game of pretend for him.

I agree with nine7tales. He's already lying to you, a friend shouldn't do that.