How do you deal with it?

I had to make to worst decision today. My senior cat wasn't eating/drinking and I discovered she broke her front tooth. Since I can't leave home since my mom is on palliative care and I am her care giver. I asked my sister to take her to the vet for observation. They called back and said since she is of advanced age, surgery wasn't an option and if she doesn't start eating in two days with the help of medication that end of life options would have to be discuss for her best interest. She also had Liver and thyroid issues and her thyroid wasn't leveling out. The vet said something else could be going wrong but without test on her frail body she couldn't tell for certain. She was underweight because she couldn't gain any. I made the tough decision to have her euthanized instead of her going through pain the rest of her life I couldn't be there when she passed and it is killing me. I see her in everything and when I close my eyes all I see is her little body wrapped in that blanket as we buried her at home. I feel like I killed her and it is tearing me up inside. A family friend said that I hope when your dog goes, she won't be alone like your cat (Gracie). It made me even more guilty.

I am dealing with the end of life care for my mom and no one but my older sister seems to want to help. My anxiety is so bad and my stress level are high. I am so sorry fro this rant but I just needed to write it out.

Anyone have any coping skills or ideas to helps because it would really help.

Thank you

Thank you for your comment. Sadly I have no videos of her but I do have pictures and intend to get one framed later this month. I do feel better now that I heard that the vet said I did the right thing and she wasn't alone when she past. You didn't come off as a loon, your post helped. Thank you.

it's really hard, honestly speaking it's going to feel awful for a while. i still think about my little one every day, but we have no choice but to go on. the only thing that makes me happy is thinking of how spoiled she was and how happy we were. she had a good life, no matter at what point it ended. this is so recent for you, dont worry about getting past it right now. accept the emotions as they come. if you need to cry, then cry. it's ok. if your sister can help more with your mother right now while you're dealing with this, that would be best for you. you deserve some time to process everything. i made a little shrine for my little one. it's got some pictures and whiskers i kept and a cute little cat figure with wings. it helps having a small place to go when you want to feel them near you again. i hope things get better for you, sending you love darlin <3

sorry for the late reply. I do have some whiskers I kept and some fur when I would groom her. The little cat figurine is a great idea and I will look into it.

You should def frame the pictures you love of her! I lost my senior cat this year too and it's been a hard time. We made a little altar in our home with his favorite toys, and it's a nice way to remember my little Slash.

I hope you are well, and don't listen to the ones that tell you what to prioritize in your life, because that's your own decision.

Late reply is super late. How do you feel lately? I'm super sorry for your cat and how she passed. I couldn't have made that decision if I were in that situation :( I tried thinking about it (euthanasia), and I felt like throwing up. I think you were stronger than me. And I'm sure you did the best you could considering everything going on in your life at the time.

As for those who guilt trip you for it, they're not worth your time, especially if they know the situation with your mother. Make sure to tell her everything you think you might want to tell her in the future when she won't be here anymore before it's too late. I did this with my late and last grandpa and I had an easy(er) time when he passed. I didn't have this chance with any of my other grandparents. but I go off-topic here, sorry.

The cat I was attached to the most died of cancer back in March. a month later I had a breakdown that made my partner call the ambulance on me. The police also came >.> they took me to the looney bin. stayed there for 2 weeks, gained 10 kg because of an antipsychotic >.> Well, it also helped me, but weight gain is a well-known side effect of this med. And I got no therapy. >_> Thanks a lot mental hospital. /s

I felt guilty, as if I betrayed the kitty, even though we tried our best to help him not be in pain, and to hopefully treat him. Whatever we did, it was way too late. :( thinking of that day, and the guilt I feel, I still feel like crying. my soul stopped breaking when remembering all the feelings and events, sometime at the beginning of this month. We went to see the movie Taylor Swift made of her Eras Tour. I was wearing a friendship bracelet with "RED" one of the songs I like. and when she started singing songs from that album, I felt I should give the bracelet away to someone else, and so I did. This action took away the grief, sorrow, and most other negative emotions related to my beloved cat that is no longer here. it still feels weird without him around. In a few months from when he left us, he would have been 12 years old.

Remember that everyone grieves differently, this is how we are built. Stay strong.

I'm doing much better in a sense. My step mom was moved to an assisted living home where she is thriving. As for my late fur baby, she is buried underneath my window and I plan to get her a marker next summer. It is a hard decision at the time but I knew as time went by, it was for the best. That 'friend' hardly visit now and I couldn't care less, I have my family to lean on and that's all that matters. I also got gifted a kitten from my niece and her partner as an early Christmas gift so he has been keeping me on my toes.

My anxiety has been bad though since her passing and I've had several bad panic attacks since but I'm on new meds so they have been helping sort of. I am sorry for your loss, losing a pet is like losing a family member and I hope you are doing well now. Therapy was offered to me but I'm not ready to talk to anyone. Mental health here sucks too so i know how you feel.