I don't want people to feel bad for me. I'm not an attention seeker. I just need people to talk to right now because I feel like I'm a horrible person. I also posted this in chit-chat.

My brother is moving back in with my parents (and I'm not allowed because I know they secretly can't stand me because I have a different outlook and attitude, but that's another issue) and he's getting the basement room ready. He asked me my opinion about Paint. He picked a colour. I said I didn't like it and to go with Vanilla (it was nice tan with a hint of yellow undertone). He paints his room the colour he chose: a light bright aqua. He hated it. Can't say I didn't tell him, so he painted the room with paint he chose for his apartment (that building sold last year, but I'm not going to talk about that). I told him he did a terrible job painting and that it's patchy.

Anyway... my brother was a Snowflake and got all offended that I said he did a shit job painting (it's patchy and a lot of the other colour can still be seen) and ran to my mom to complain (he's 31). my mom said to me today to leave him alone and don't come over. I said oh boo hoo, he insults me plenty of times and I don't go whining to you.

Oh! I also forgot that my mom's little dog spilled a whole Starbucks drink when I was holding the tray (we went to Starbucks a few days ago) and somehow it was MY job to clean it when it wasn't my car. So since I didn't clean it and the smell of sour milk almost made him throw up, everyone is pissed at me.

My mom also has a tendency to make excuses for him. Blames his behavior on stress, depression and his PTSD, or his medication.

My brother is also a mini version of my dad. Has the same temper. My brother said to me a few months ago "When I come out of bankruptcy, I'll be applying at ____ and will be making $24/hr and that's way more than what you make". I said "Well, at least I have a job and it pays".

I wasted my WHOLE month of July helping that little f*ck and I only have 8 weeks of summer because I'm a school bus driver. Well, now I have one month to do the things I want to do: lose weight and make pre-made dinners ahead of time for when I go back to work.

Somehow I feel like I'm the bad guy when I had to help out, or else I wouldn't hear the end of it.

Note: I don't have a car and I would love to go kayaking and canoeing and do fun things that everyone else does. But I also have no friends in real life. I just can't make them no matter how hard I try. Now I feel like I'm a shifty person who is a failure. There's a reason why I hate everything. My dad wasn't nice to me growing up. He did some terrible things. He's still not nice to me. I gained 35lbs ans he made a jab at my weight gain the other day when he is far from being thin.

Day 2: I sold some of my brothers furniture and all I get was a thank you. No $ tip. And when something sells, he can't even be bothered to tell me so I can take the listing down. And now he's trying to say that the two things I'm trying to sell are his. No bitch. The landlord gave me those and they ARE MINE. My brother gave me an area rug and then when we were moving things into storage, he claimed he never gave me the rug and there was a big argument. My mom said to him (after 20min of arguing and her telling me I'm being childish when I said to take the fucking carpet back as I don't want it if you're gonna take it from me) "You gave her the rug and don't remember". He took back his rug.

All my life things have been taken from me. And my mom? Makes excuses for him: his memory is bad because of medication. He sweats a lot because of medication.

So, he can't exercise (he lost all his muscle mass), or go for a walk because he's lazy, but it's really his medicine, PTSD and depression? And bhim being on the computer all day is also caused by those things? lol. I don't buy that crap.

I suffer from anxiety, depression and PTSD, yet I still take the bull by the horns. I'm just hard wired differently.

How the Hell are YOU the bad guy? And you are certainly NOT a shifty person, no matter what the circumstances are. You might not have been able to achieve all the things you wanted, but you did get some of them and you tried. That makes you an above average person in everything and a failure at nothing. Your family is horrible in many ways, though maybe there's a couple nice things in there somewhere, Idk. Trying to look at the bright side... In any case, they are wrong about you, and how they treat you, and its no wonder they make you feel wretched! But that is not your fault. It is theirs. I know its nearly impossible, but don't listen to them. Remember it is they who have the problems and cause the problems. It is not you. And you know from experience that none of them treat you well or fairly, so stop expecting it. It just adds into the hurt you can't help but feel because they are family. And family certainly should show love and concern for you. It's a damn shame they don't, but its also nothing you can change. It's up to you to do your best to rise above it and try to be free of it and have faith in yourself. You are strong. You are invincible. <3 I Am Woman

Thank you for that. I know you're right and it is hard to not listen to that. Know what I did? I went over to my parents anyway. My mom said "what are you doing here?" I said "I thought you were mad at me? You told me to stay home" and she said "if we were mad, we'd tell you" I don't get it and I'm not going to try to understand.

I don't get it either. But good for you. :)

you offered help. Never let anyone make you feel that way, especially family. You deserve to be treated better. If they have a problem thats their fault.

I sold some of my brothers furniture and all I get was a thank you. No $ tip. And when something sells, he can't even be bothered to tell me so I can take the listing down. And now he's trying to say that the two things I'm trying to sell are his. No bitch. The landlord gave me those and they ARE MINE. My brother gave me an area rug and then when we were moving things into storage, he claimed he never gave me the rug and there was a big argument. My mom said to him (after 20min of arguing and her telling me I'm being childish when I said to take the fucking carpet back as I don't want it if you're gonna take it from me) "You gave her the rug and don't remember". He took back his rug.

All my life things have been taken from me. And my mom? Makes excuses for him: his memory is bad because of medication. He sweats a lot because of medication.

So, he can't exercise (he lost all his muscle mass), or go for a walk because he's lazy, but it's really his medicine, PTSD and depression? And bhim being on the computer all day is also caused by those things? lol. I don't buy that crap and I took psychology.

I suffer from anxiety, depression and PTSD, yet I still take the bull by the horns.

My brother has it made now! Mommy will coddle him even more, cook and clean. He doesn't have to lift a finger. I'd never be able to live with him. He can't even wash a dirty plate.

I don't know how to fix that part of me. The part that always gets hurt, sad and cries because people are mean to me. They've been mean to me all my life and yet, I haven't built up a wall to keep the hurt out.

Dude from reading your stories over time I think that a group of drug addicts would have more appreciation for you than your family. From seeing how fast they found space from your brother after the old complex sold and gave you vague "Eh sorry about your luck" to how quick they jump on you as the bad guy in situations then act like it was nothing just makes me so upset for you. You are entirely allowed to tell them you have no time to help with xyz anymore. Or skip every other non obligation with them. Or even just keep your distance. I get its hard with minimal to no friends (I live alone and see maybe 2 friends other than my sister, even then it's not consistent) but the peace of mind is well worth it.

I'm wagering it won't be long before your mom asks your brother for simple help and he will say it's "unbearable " to live there.

The only reason why they made room for him, is because he got evicted from my grandmas house and he moved in with her to take care of her (he had no where to go after our apartment building sold anyway). Long story short, the last 3 weeks of my grandmas life, my aunt and uncle (who could never be bothered with her started showing up after she said how much money she had in the bank) got her to rewrite the will and everything was left to them. So my scamcle doesn't want him living in the house, so he evicted him.

Like, who tries to take items that don't belong to you or takes back something after it was given to you?

I'm glad that I wasn't allowed to go back home. I'd rather struggle and live pay check to pay check. I'm already in an apartment I hate, but going back home would be so much worse

You are, in no way, the bad guy in this. They're taking advantage and manipulating and wow. They're ridiculously toxic and I'd honestly go no contact at this point.

Be safe. <3

I would consider going low contact or no contact.

I would also get into therapy (can be pricey I know but it may be worth it for a short period at least) and discuss your family dynamic. A trained professional should be able to help you identify the toxic behavior vs you being the one in the wrong and help you build strategies to help.

I don't feel from what you explained, that you are in the wrong. If anything it feels like you are being taken advantage of and I hope good returns to you as you seem to put good into the world, despite others taking advantage of that.

You sound like a real nice person too nice to get treated that way n u always will have friends here.

My family 6 sisters and 2 brothers hates me and always made me feel like crap and I was always depressed until I cut all contact with them we haven't spoke in over 10 yrs I even moved to a different state away from them I still love my family just best to stay away from them and by being away n no contact I have alot better n happier life.