One of my own, in fact 😳 don’t do melatonin kids!

This is Harriet(t), my koi on Neopets Classic, and last night I had a dream about her owning a candy shop in Niagara Falls. In the dream I was controlling this short old bearded person (who was still somehow a petite woman, like with a lady’s body)), who would regularly come into this candy shop to try and buy gummy sharks and miscellaneous other goodies. The first time I tried this Harriett shooed me out but we became friendly, and we had set up a private meeting on New Year’s Eve in the back of her store. When I went to actually do that, she had closed the store for the remainder of the holiday break, but I had gone out and bought her a big blue swirly lollipop at a present (even though I had partially eaten the top of it already)

I went back to my flat, which was this old dinghy apartment that I’m not 100% sure I wasn’t squatting in! One of my friends (?) there who I would regularly room with was this stout guy called Cleveland, who had a neckbeard and was constantly warning me about shadows. I had taken the lift up with him only to find my room was full of about 15 other people. I pretty much spent the entire night lighting up a fire and providing what little food I had to these weirdos, during which they were going off about this weird illustrated book that was supposedly created by me (by that, I mean Ray, not the bearded lady in the dream) when I was 8. After I had finished tending to them and gave out some chocolates I had bought from Harriett (which they went nuts for), I got changed IN THE MIDDLE OF THE STREET into a blue leather jacket and similarly coloured slacks. Then I went to go see Harriett only to find her store was closed :C even in my dreams I can’t score lmao

So unfortunately no cow cuddling dreams during my sleepsies, but this was pretty cool too. The rest of my dreams that night were really unpleasant and distressing, so I’m surprised I remembered this one in so much detail

Wot in tarnashun

I am so sorry for subjecting you to this :C This was written a couple minutes after I fully woke up and I thought it was funny enough to share

don’t worry my fish vpets are very safe

i think that's def on the same level as cow cuddling dreams tbh!! harriett sounds like the perfect candy shop keeper, what a responsible and organised young fibsh

HEY it is 1 AM and I have the sads :C unpleasant vivid dreams suck and they’ve been hampering my sleep a ton, chatting with you always makes me happy though

Yeah Harriett is great!! The other day I had her quit her job on here so I think that’s why she was on my mind, it just doesn’t pay very well for the stat requirements it has. Maybe I should have her apply for the candy store tbh 🤔

Anyway how’re you doing??

oh noooo i hate that for you :c i've been having the same problem lately, it sucks so much D: i hope a lil chat can get the sads and vivd dreams out of you noggin <3

ahh yes she must have been trying to tell you that she wants to apply for a candy shop position! it's a Sign

i'm doing alright ty! i had a couple of my nieces over last night so i'm kinda tired now, but it was fun c: we ate lots of cookies and candy and went out to look at christmas lights. one of them actually reminds me of you bc she's 17 too aha

oh and thank you for the penguins!! the flirty penguin is my fav :')

The thing that really sucks is that the worst dreams are always about mental health shit, like me gradually going insane/not being able to control my own behaviour. Sometimes it can lead to some admittedly funny scenarios, like me levitating and giving the middle finger to a lady chasing me after I got HIT BY A TRAIN, but in context a lot of it is really distressing. Hence I’m too scared to take melatonin and am just kind of moping in bed until I’m able to fall asleep.

But talking helps a lot, especially when it’s about nice things. I’m happy you got to spend some fun times with family at least! They sound like sweet people, it’s admittedly kind of weird hearing how young people your own age are in comparison to other people! Wish I could’ve been there to sample those snacks - although handfuls of dream candy should tie me over

And you’re very welcome! 🐧 I’ve decided on the theme for tomorrow so things should be a lot less random from here on out heheh

ugh i know exactly what you mean, those dreams are the worst - even the ones that turn into weird/funny scenarios (nothing like surviving the train squish to go and give a lady the finger) :') i think one of my least fav things about those dreams are the lingering feelings that hang around after you've woken up. i'm really sorry that you're having to deal with this though, it must be really difficult since you can't avoid sleep forever D;

i'm glad talking helps!! that means i have a way of being there for you if you need it c: ty! it was really nice, i haven't been able to hang out like that for a long time and just enjoy it without the stress, so it was good. oh same, it's just as weird for me too tbh! my niece's bday was a couple months ago and it feels so strange bc i still remember my 17th so well and now suddenly i'm watching my niece who i grew up with become the same age. idk it's just so trippy, especially realising that my 17th was nearly a decade ago?? lawd you guys make me feel so old ahaha <3 i wish i could've shared the snacks with you! we had sourpatch kids, jelly beans, gummy snakes, chocolate, oreos, nice biscuits and vegan honeycomb. i felt so sick after tho lol

omg you're so dedicated to this, i love it ;~; and the penguins aren't random imo, i think they go with the xmas theme really well!

i just gotta do my washing, but i should be back after!

Well I didn’t really survive the train squish, my ghost kinda came out and gave her the finger as I was trying to force myself to wake up. (It feels weird saying “my ghost came out” haha)

Yeah for most of yesterday I’ve been feeling pretty bummed, desperately trying to catch up on sleep, that kinda stuff. The worst part probably has to be the whole internalised “you were born useless and will never amount to anything no matter how hard you try” sentiment that just cuts into an productive desire you have. Tuesday was great because I got past this and got a ton of study and work done, I’m just hoping I can do that again (and Thursday was pretty good for that as well, did some adult financial planning)

OH and have a nice wash! I like those snacks and hearing you enjoyed them makes me happy ;~; for the holidays my family usually gets these raisin sweetbread loaves and the taste of them always gets me really nostalgic around this time of year. Although nothing beats a big ol gummyworm

i am back! i take a lifetime to get my washed clothes in and out of the dryer, sorry about that lol

ohh gotcha, well at least ghosts can't get injured ig? xD what's your method of forcing yourself to wake up? i always have a special blink/squint that i do which works about 80% of the time haha

ughhh i hate that. it's so hard trying to argue with yourself about the 'born useless' belief, it's such a persistent and draining little bastard tbh. i'm sorry you've been feeling this way :c just so you know, i absolutely disagree with your brain on that one, but i do understand the struggle with that feeling and that it can't just be 'switched off' bc someone says otherwise. i do hope you'll be able to gradually shift that idea in time though <3

i'm glad tuesday and thursday were meaningful/productive for you tho, that's good to hear. fingers crossed you can do that again, but still be nice to yourself if it doesn't happen too!

oooh raisin sweetbread loaves sound really comforting and tasty. i wish we had something like that here but aussieland is all about prawns and pavlova on christmas :/

the gummy snakes we have here are different to gummy worms (worms are superior!). they look like this: http://www.hahndorfsweets.com.au/allens-snakes-alive

hopefully that link worked 👀 i don't eat these bc they have gelatin but when i used to, i thought the red and yellow ones were the best 🐍

Ha! About time too, I was going crazy up in my thoughts

Those gummy snakes look really cool - I’d say the worms are a bit chunkier from what I’ve experienced! Man Aussieland always gets such cool snack foods from what you’ve told me, I’ve always wanted to try one of those chocolate fish so popular over in New Zealand!

I’d die for some cheapo candy right about now, might actually make me feel better for once. It just sucks when you’re alone and not really able/willing to do anything, your dark thoughts just kinda eat you alive haha. Thanks for caring enough to chat with me through this though

ahh i'm sorry friend!! <3

i agree on the wormy chunk factor! altho you should see the gummy pythons we have, they're crazy long and soooo chonky! i've never been able to finish one lol

ooh what are the chocolate fish? they sound familiar but i've never seen them here :o

i wish i could share, i've got like 4kg of sourpatch kids here and sooo much chocolate :') you need a little candy stash for times like these!

oof yep, being curled up with the dark thoughts and unable to do anything but wait for it to pass while it eats you,,,aka Hell 😭 it sucks i can't be there for you in person rn! we could be playing board games or something to help distract you ;~; and ofc, we can't have you feeling like shit all on your own!! <3

omg i'm sorry that was late again, i was just getting dinner but i didn't realise how long that actually took me D: i hope you're doing okie

WAHHh thank you for the candies!! It’s so sweet of you to get some for me even if it’s mostly in spirit ;~; chocolate fish are these little chocolate-covered marshmallow treats that are apparently really popular in kiwiland, idk how to get them in Canada but I’d love to try some. Best of both worlds I reckon

And iss ok friend, you’re not my personal therapist and I don’t want to cloud your mind with all my teenage angst!! Honestly I’d love to take a time like this off to eat sugar snacks and play board/card games with a friend, it’s little moments like those that fill me which such overwhelming happiness :’)

Reminds me - I learned through Neopets how to play a lot of basic card games (mostly solo) and was teaching my parents how to play Cheat up at a riverside rental house a good few years back. It was stupid fun and we even went through a section where the exact same card (a seven of spades I think?) kept winding up being used as the dedicated “cheat” card and winding up in peoples’ hands through the centre pile, it felt so good when I actually got to play it despite my mum calling cheat : ]

raaay, i have to go out now for my therapy homework, but i'll make sure to check back in when i return home! hopefully you've gone to sleepyland with pleasant dreams of harriett and candy <3

oh no i didn't see your last reply, my apologies!! i shall answer it properly when i get back c: i really wanna try those fish now tho

now, as we were saying c: i know you're probably sleeping now but imma answer your last reply properly anyway!!

you're welcome for the candies!! i'm sorry i can't get you any irl ones but hopefully they still bring you joy in spirit :')

i wonder if i could get any of those fishy candies in aussieland :o altho ig finding them at all is hard enough, but trying to find vegan ones would be something else haha anyway i hope you can find a way to get some to canada!

me too, there's something weirdly sacred about sugary snacks and games. i have really fond memories of when my big sister and i used to put on a hilary duff movie, play monopoly, eat cadbury top deck chocolate and drink vanilla coke. that specific combo is v nostalgic to me haha

what board games do you like playing? if we were hanging out irl rn, we could play the adventures in neopia board game XD it's surprisingly good actually!

omg me too, neo taught me how to play quite a few card games that i was previously clueless about! i really love that you got to use that knowledge with your family tho, that sounds borderline magical :D

edit: wahhh ray you didn't have to send me candy ;~; i do really love it tho, tysm!! <3 and the chemist doll had me chuckling ahaha