I've been feeling upset recently cause of something someone I know did. This is a person who I have confused feelings for, I think it's a "squish" or a strong desire to be friends with them, I enjoy their company because they make me smile a lot, but recently they did something that upset me, I know they didn't mean it and didn't think it would affect me that much, but I'm still hurt by it because I can't help how I feel even if my rational mind understands, and I feel like the only way to resolve it is to talk to them about it, but that might end up bringing up my feelings for them which would make it awkward, and I also don't want to make them feel bad about it because I like them so much and I'd hate to upset them. So what do I do?

Be honest with them. Tell them, hey this thing you did actually upset me a whole lot, i know you didn't mean it like that, but it affected me a lot more than I thought it would. I hope you understand, and that we can try to avoid a situation like this in the future. Something like that. You don't have to mention the squish, and if they feel similarly about your friendship they will hopefully understand that you aren't trying to be hurtful. You're just establishing boundaries and that's healthy in any type of relation. Best of luck with it!

I talked to my Mum about it, she said that telling them might not actually help because the problem is with me for taking it personally. But that just brings up the fact that I'm sensitive and I don't want to keep feeling upset and I don't know how else to stop. I just think I shouldn't be upset over something as silly as this is. How do I stop taking things so personally?

Tolerance and pain usually numbs the soul, given enough time but, honestly, I don't think you need to keep this to yourself. If you're offended, tell him you're offended, but be prepared to be gaslit into thinking it's just you. Lots of people show how immature they really are when they get called out on bad behavior. If he's a decent dude, he'll apologize and refrain. If he's even mildly bratty, he'll excuse himself, blame you/your sensitivity and may throw a tantrum. (Not that I know the dude but that tends to be my usual experience.)

Another alternative is to wait a week after the incident. If it's still bothering you on the 7th day then say something but try to distract yourself in the mean time. You can also keep a record so if he does it two more times, you can tell him how many times and when then take him to task for it.

I'm not offended, I'm just more upset than they thought I would be and I don't think they realise it. In fact, they seem like they would be understanding, but I have very low self-esteem so I'm worried that everyone I know secretly hates me and that if I do something too bad without realising, they won't want to be my friend anymore.

hey! Look, if that thing still bothers you, DO tell your friend. And do it the way Sound said. It's pretty obvious you can't help but feel the way you feel. yes. you're over-sensitive. it's something you need to learn to live with, unfortunately. It sounds like to me your mother is either glossing over how you are or gas-lighting you. neither is helpful or healthy. you can tell your friend 'I am over-sensitive. That day, you did/said this and it upset me more than i want to admit. i know you didn't mean it in a bad way. but i still think about it and i want to stop thinking of it. I don't want this to ruin our friendship." You can text or email your friend with this exact text if you want to -and add in the thing that bothered you. You can call your friend right after you send the text to make sure they read it. if your friend knows you're oversensitive and insecure, they'll understand. The last thing you want is to keep it all inside. that's not healthy nor mature. If you want to be mature, you need to be able to talk about your feelings. or the feeling of those around you.

I think I'm almost over it, maybe I should just let it go.

At the time I made this thread, I wanted advice because every time I thought I was over it, I just got upset again.

The truth is, I felt like I'd been betrayed, like they'd gone back on a promise, even though they never promised everything in the first place. They simply said they would let me know if they were going to do a specific thing, and then they didn't, and it felt like a sting to me, but they probably either changed their mind or forgot about it.

So I guess what I really wanted out of this was for them to know that I like to be warned about things. I could just tell them that when the appropriate time comes.

For this specific thing they did/didn't do, i'd feel the same way you felt. And i'd like to think i'm not very sensitive. I was taught to try my best to keep my word, and if i can't keep my word, to inform the person. i guess, i just expect people to be the same. but of course they aren't :/ I hope you're feeling better, /hugs