What do you do when they don't seem to care?
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So you have a friend, a good one, years spent together doing all kind of shit. And then you're apart, but still as good friends as before, talk each day, laugh, tell each other stuff of life. And then they ask you how are you, really, how are you feeling? And you tell them meh, not as good, I must have an operation soon...and then nothing back. Nada. Zip. No questions, no worries, no concerns, zippolla. Not even the usual, daily hello we used to say. I don't get it. What? Help me understand where did I go wrong? I have this childhood friend, we talk each day at least once, now she asks me how am I, I tell her about my shoulder operation, nothing in a week. Not even a "drop dead, never stand you", at least, then I'd know. And she's fine, 'cos our other common friend talked to her. What did I say wrong? Why does she say she cares when she doesn't? Is it my fault? Should I've not said about the operation, just keep it joking and funny as I used to? I'm confuzzeld...
Why don't you just ask her? Or at least take the initiative to get back in touch? It could be that at that moment she forgot to answer or she got confused about what you were expecting. You won't know unless you ask her about it.
People just don't know how to act when someone's hurting. It's nothing you did.
TLDR.
We've got a lot of sickness in this house rn. Leukemia, last stage of congestive heart failure, renal failure, and even I've got a few health problems. When all this first started we lost a lot of friends. Family too. Just like that. Sometimes even now I'll make a new friend and they'll be gone the minute they realize that I have some things going on in my life.
I think for a lot of them it's just the emotional stress of knowing someone's hurting and they can't do anything about it. Some of them are just selfish too though. Either way it's a lot and it hurts so much, but it's more about them than you.
I did. Still no answer, but she saw the message. Maybe she's got nothing to say...
Sorry...and yes, you might be right, 'cos now I don't know what to say to you...hugs?
Yeah, it just freezes people up. hugs Some of them come back around though. Maybe she will too.
This is just coming from me as someone who does 100 things at once. Sometimes when a message pops up, I'll read it, realize I have to do something else, and then forget to respond - and I'll look like... days later and be like 'well, shit...' So, maybe that could have happened?
Either way, someone isn't a very good friend if they aren't going to be there for you during the tougher times. It's shoulder surgery, it's not like you told her you killed a man and are on the run.
Hugs back, just seen this, sorry ❤
Thanks for the LOLs :D
She's back, y'all, but...something seems off, you know...meh, maybe I'm just too sensitive...