I don't actually think anyone will reply but I need to vent this out and this is the only place I know for sure that I can be open without my BF seeing it.

I am sorry if this gets long. I have currently been having some serious money trouble - I live with my mom and we were about a month away from loosing our house. This has put us into debt and made it so we got into a hole that we are slowly climbing out of. Let's say we are in debt for over $2500 and my mom's bank account is negative at least $200. I have been so stressed about this but have been trying to keep it together and not bother anyone, my boyfriend especially. My boyfriend is not the best to go to when I need emotional support - he tells me he is unable to really handle that because of things that have happened in the past to him (ex drama). Actually the last time I cried in front of him (the only time I cried in front of him since we started dating) he yelled at me and told me to 'just stop.' This has made it very hard for me to trust in him enough to tell him things and be emotional. I am working with the a therapist though about how to handle my emotions better and how to handle situations.

Now I come to this morning - I work overnights and didn't get home and in bed till around 5am - and my boyfriend texts me. I had texted him to have a good day, and he replied that he wouldn't. After asking what was wrong he tells me his life is ruined. Last night he told me that his account was negative $30 and he won't have money for food or a bus to get to work (so he will have to walk) till his next pay check (about 10 days). I offered him the little cushion money I have (about $50) to at least pay for his bus pass but he refused it. This morning after he texted me about his life being ruined I tried to be supportive and help him. I told him that he could cook with the food he has in the house and take it to work, that he just wouldn't be able to have pizza rolls everyday. I was then told that he doesn't want to eat shi**y pasta and rotten food. I know what he has because he just moved to a new place and I packed his food, he has canned veggies, pasta sauce, unopened bag of dried pasta, boxes of scalloped potatoes.... there is enough food for more than 2 weeks. He told me that what I suggested was not an option - he eats a whole box of pasta in two sittings. I tried helping and being understanding... I know about being poor and having money issues (the things I am going through right now makes his look like a cake walk). However after a little while I just gave up on the coddling - I couldn't keep being shot down and him being so stubborn.

He told me his life was ruined and that he should die. I told him that if this current money thing is the worst thing happening to him now - he has it better than most. This set him off... now all his texts where in capital letters. He told me that he has it terrible because he is an ex felon (he isn't really, he was charged with something but went to court and the charges were dropped) who cannot get a better job, his life has been through hell... and he has money problems. I might have been rude (and I have tried to say sorry for that) but I told him that he wasn't an ex felon... he has a record (which can get cleared) but that doesn't stop people from getting a job --- what will stop him though is that he doesn't have a GED (I bought him a book and offered multiple times to help him study). At this point he told me he hated me. Then proceeded to block me from texting and unfriend me (and block me) on facebook. He will do this to friends, and has done this to me before - he gets angry and just stops talking to people for however long, could be a day or a year... you don't know. I told him last time that just not talking is not a good way to be in a relationship and he at least needs to talk to me... he can have all the space but to block me is not okay.

Now I don't know what to do. Are we over? Should I just give up at this point? He tells me his is scared of commitments and that we will probably never be married. He doesn't want to look toward the future - he can give me maybe a year in the future but that doesn't include planning things with me. I am so lost and all I want to do is know what is happening. Any advice would be loved... I will answer any questions if you need more info.

I'm seeing a lot of red flags honestly, and you should have dumped him a long time ago in my opinion. A relationship is a two way street, if he expects that you will try to comfort him when he's down he should do the same for you, or at least try despite whatever past drama/trauma/whatever other bs excuses he has.

At this point since he's blocked you (and not for the first time, it sounds like?) just leave it be. Call it over, block him back so in case he unblocks you he can't reach out, and leave him in the dust. He's giving you excuses to make up for his own shitty behavior, and that's a sign that he's no good for you.

What you deserve is someone who is willing to help you. If you've had a bad day you can talk to them without fear of it blowing up or being told otherwise, and if they're having a bad day they can talk to you and not have it blow up when you try to give them advice. You deserve better than the way he's treated you, 100%, and in leaving him behind you can move forward and find someone who will be that for you.

, Thank you. I think I am in agreement. I don't like it but he needs some serious therapy and if he cannot be what I need then it isn't fair to me to always be what he needs.

It sounds like someone already gave you a good answer, but I just wanted to echo that they are spot on. Red Flags are popping up like daisies in Spring. '

I don't know how old you both are but I see this a lot. One person is prone to outbursts, the other is prone to accepting them. And its a dangerous habit to get into because the person prone to accepting those outbursts tend to end up abused. Remember, Emotional abuse is still Abuse!

Your boyfriend is a Drama Queen, plain and simple and coddling is why it doesn't get any better. Stop. I know that's easier said than done, but it wasn't til about a year ago that I started realizing that Tough Love does have a place in life and this is why. He can not learn that his actions are awful and abusive if he gets coddled by anyone, Even one person will be a reason to turn around and say, "but so-n-so thinks I'm fine how I am."

He also needs mental help from the sound of it based on the Fear of Commitments, the outbursts and overwhelming negativity. And with you struggling with your own, that's a toxic bomb waiting to happen.

For many years, I hopped relationship to relationship, and I would put up with behaviors like this, and also be the one with behaviors like this sometimes. Last year, I forced myself to be single for over a year. Would you believe Im now at a point where I don't want a relationship? Im learning about me, doing my own thing, etc. Im establishing not only better health for myself but routines in my life, independence, etc. That being said a Relationship did fall into my lap, but with a guy who is patient, helpful but not coddling, and who understands me. In fact, we were friends for over a 2 yrs before he moved all the way here and he isn't forcing labels on it, we're maintaining some independence while slowly mixing our lives together. It's weird, wonderful, and exciting.

You deserve someone that can lift stress off your shoulders, not by necessarily carrying the weight for you, but by helping you set that weight aside to enjoy being with them for a time, and maybe carrying it sometimes, or helping you grip onto it better, or share the burden. Someone who let's you handle your business and independence, but doesn't let you fall.

And I should clarify, by no means am I saying he's a bad guy either. But he need to work on some things. The kind of work he needs to do alone for a bit so he can focus. And there's no telling how long that will take or if he will even try. You can't/shouldn't put your life on hold for that kind of thing.

I hope you get through all this with ease!

I'd be leaving that situation. I get having had/rough times or moments but sheesh this is not only full negative reactions but childish too.

Leave and don't look back. Focus on you and your moms stuff.