Do you wish your parents had been there for you more?

I don't know about you but I was allowed to dress myself by the 5th grade and I don't think I'd let my kid do it if I had one. Also, I got away with not doing my homework at home for years if I did it at all. Mind you, I'm not bashing my mother. She was a good influence for me for a long time.

I'm just feeling bitter because I let a few people I met on the internet influence my career choices and now I really feel like a stupid person and I'm supoer behind on earning my degree. Thankfully I've earned 66credits towards it. Aiming to become a Librarian. =)

I was always allowed to dress myself...not that there was many options since up until 8th grade, my schools required a uniform. Also, I stopped doing my homework at home since middle school and usually do it some period at school. As long as my grades were good, they did't micromanage me in the school aspects too much.

My parents really gave me a lot of freedom to be me as long as I didn't bring them any shame/dishonor. Or course, we had arguments about what is shameful and what isn't. They weren't super involved in my life. Not in schoolwork, projects, extracurricular, college major, what college I went to, career choice, or anything really. We never had the birds and bees talk. They never asked about my dating life or try to get to know any of my friends. Didn't go to any of my competitions, tournaments, or games. The most involvement they have is knowing where I was going whenever I leave the house and medical stuff. But if I asked for help, like moving into my dorm and stuff like that, they would help me. That was about it. And I don't really wish they were more involved. At least, for me, I don't think it would have changed anything.

With that said, they are VERY involved in my sister's life and a lot of arguments I've had with my parents stem from that. I feel bad for my sister because they are very controlling of her life and wish they would just let her be sometime.

If there was one thing I wish more of my parents, I wish they would try harder to understand the world outside of the Vietnamese community. Like, if I asked them about pop culture, they wouldn't have a clue about anything artists/songs currently playing on the radio. They wouldn't know about much about the music I like that influences me. They don't know about memes or movies. Though, in the grand scheme of things, I guess it's really not that important. I know they already learned English, which is more than I should ask for but it's hard for us to connect.

I don't think the choosing clothing thing is about being there for you, it's about fostering independence. I most certainly chose my own clothing by that age.

I also think a lot of parents aren't actively involved in homework. Maybe at primary school they'd help if I asked but by the time I was in high school I was left to my own devices. Other than the not so stellar report cards that came in when they'd remind me how much of a disappointment I was in comparison to my friends they didn't make me do anything.

I wish though they'd let me explore more than just what they wanted. They were very involved in my sporting life because my dad was desperate for me to succeed in the sport of his choice. However, when it came to other things they took no interest. Music for example. When I went to a trial music class they basically said, we're no good at music so you won't be either, we're not wasting money on this. Or for learning a language I said no when they first asked (age 4) so they never asked again and if I did ask they'd say, but you already rejected it.

Yes absolutely - my parents were there but not emotionally of mentally.

People who have parents should be lucky.lost mine when I was 7 and 18.

I'm sorry to hear about your losses. I wholeheartedly disagree with your sentiment - just having parents doesn't mean you're lucky at all.

It's a difficult question. Mine were there physically, but not mentally most of the time. All boiled down, it has made me a very independent person, but also a very lonely person. Had they been capable of being there, I would probably be a very different person than I am now. It makes me sad to think about, which is pointless because I can't change it.

5th grade kids are more than capable of dressing themselves (but of course if they look ridiculous it would be nice of the parent to step in). I know the homework thing too well, and I still struggle with studying because of it.

I mean at least I have good adult relationships with my parents.

My mom was around more because my dad worked full time - Mom stayed home with me. Because of that situation, I've always been closer with my mom and more respectful of her I guess. My dad and I don't get along that well for the most part, but the thing is, I think I resent him a little for not being there as much when I was younger (although when I was younger, I was daddy's little girl). He usually worked full time plus weekends and holidays, because he'd get double/triple-time. Now that I'm older, I understand why he did it that way - hell, I do the same thing now. I don't think he and I will ever be that close though, the way my mom and I are. Although now, that's mainly because of a couple disorders I have that he refuses to think are real, instead thinking that I'm trying to be controlling or something, but that's a whole other story that I don't care to get into.

I don't have children myself, at least not human children. My kids run around naked all the time...in their fur and scales and shells.