Hey guys. I don't know if it might be a long post, but that's why I came here to ask questions. As you may expect from the title, I have a habit of being rather verbose with my posts, usually as a way to make sure I don't confuse folks. I'm a less verbose guy in real life, mostly due to my shyness, so I'm more laconic than loquacious. Online, and sometimes offline when I get nervous, I have a habit of running my mouth a mile a minute, mostly due to the fact that it's a fair bit easy to misunderstand what people post on the internet, and mostly because I don't like pissing off people with what I say, even if what I said was rather tame. Anyone know how to be less verbose? It makes me twitch when I have to hinge on every detail in order to avoid misunderstandings...

the first step is coming to terms with the fact that no matter what you do or say you run the risk of offending or miscommunicating to someone. Every human is different and your job is to just be you. i have the same issue at times. Like sometimes my texts or responses come off "cold and professional" or so I've been told. my vocabulary isn't as broad as yours but I somewhat understand the concern you have. imagine the online conversation out loud. does it sound like an average conversation you would have? if not revamp but also don't fret. if you are spending more then 5 minutes on fixing a response my rule is to erase, re read the thing you are responding to and play it in your head like it was in person. i get communication anxiety over the internet and texts and maybe that might help? it helps me but everyone is different. good luck :3

Simplifying the way you speak online might help a lot. Not saying that you are at all, but I find people that use words like you do sound a bit pretentious and it kind of comes across as know-it-all behavior (sorry, I don't mean to be offensive!) The internet is a simple (albeit stupid at times) place and people prefer simpler terms of speaking imo. Not saying you have to completely dumb yourself down, but maybe going 'does the average person know what this word means?' If not, use something else.

Also like said, you're always going to offend/misunderstand someone at some point no matter what. It's just part of how things are going to be when you're talking to someone without being able to know their tone and personality. Try and slow yourself down, think about what you're going to say before you say it and really try not to stress too much, lots of people talk quickly when they're nervous or uncomfortable (myself included).

My suggestion would be to think of communication on the internet as a conversation you're having with someone who is in the same room as you. Keep the long-winded sentences with big words for academic papers. (laconic and loquacious are words I'm familiar with, for instance, but they might make you come across as arrogant or pretentious to other people.) The other thing I would do is take advantage of paragraph breaks. It helps with readability, since big blocks of text can make people's eye glaze over and skim through what you're saying instead of actually reading it. The third, and probably most important would be that the nature of internet text posts means you can take your time in crafting a reply. If you think something might come across in a way you didn't intend, edit it!

Other people have already given good advice about accepting that you can't control other people's reactions. In the event there's a misunderstanding that isn't easily fixable, there's not much more you can do than offer a sincere apology and maybe ask someone you trust if you're not sure what you did wrong. In general, though, I agree with what has said. Lots of people are awkward or anxious online; you're definitely not alone.

Oh, I have the same problem!!! Like, a lot. I tend to go uppity and overcomplicated in writing – but when I'm speaking with people IRL it's usually something like "yeah I fell ya" and things that sounded better in my head or in English (not my main language, but I read in English a lot and it FUCKED UP MY THOGHT-WORDING PROCESS). Since all people are different people you have like a 70% chance to be misinterpreted. So start simple? And then add more if you see that people don’t understand things you’ve said the way you’ve meant them? And give them explanations if needed. You can’t say something and hope for 100% accurate meaning transition. Imagine you're speaking two different languages – so you have to go slow and simple. Not that it helps me much, haha. I’ve been really stressed lately – and when I start telling my mother something I mostly see her taking it all the wrong way. Or the way where the things I’m describing seem to her to be my fault and the way I’m doing them wrong. So I stop my rant midsentence or don’t talk at all. Helps a lot to boost my confidence and social skills. Thanks, mom. Also, doesn’t help that I mostly speak to 6-10 people right now tops (not small talk but talks where I express myself). I soo need to widen my active social circle. Aaaand this post went too verbose and a bit off-topic. Great

step 1: stop saying words like laconic and loquacious.

I definitely agree with just accept that people will misunderstand no matter how many or few words you use. Lots of people practically live to pick fights, especially on the Internet. It's always been a problem, but especially with how we can project a public image on social media, there are lots of people who care more about appearances than reality. Many "friends" don't want honesty, they want people to constantly agree with them. I've cut many "friends" like this out of my life and I've never been happier. Trying to please everyone was a serious wear on my mental health.

Don't try to be "less verbose." Gain the confidence to not care if people don't like how you write or speak. You can take into account things like paragraph breaks and if people might not know certain words, but it sounds like confidence is the main thing that will help you.