I'm not even sure if this topic is allowed. I'm sorry if it isn't, I just have no one to talk to and just needed to put something down somewhere and pretend someone is reading or listening.

But yeah, I had a miscarriage. It hurts. We were trying for just over 4 years. So yeah it really hurts.

I feel very alone. Only a few people know but I feel like none of them really understand and have said some thing's that have really hurt me.

I don't think you can really understand how this feels unless you've gone through it yourself because I used to think that it can't be THAT bad surely because you can just try again.. But I was wrong.

I feel like some one has died. My heart.. it really hurts.

I was so so happy and really excited for the future but now I'm scared again. I know time is meant to heal but I think this will stick with me forever.

I want to move on, pick myself up and concentrate on other things but its hard. I've never had to deal with grief and I want to get help but I feel insignificant. :(

It hasnt happened to me, but i could empathize and understand if you got attached to what you envisioned as this little human inside you, you having already formed an emotional connection and started envisioning a life and wonderful things to come. That would hurt me too. You should open up about it to close friends and family, most people will completely understand and sympathize and be there for you if youre going through that.

My only advice is to think of it this way, pretend your future babys soul is out there somewhere, and it picked you out in the universe and put itself in the vessel that was inside you. But unfortunately, the vessel did not make it so its soul was returned to the universe, but its still watching you and waiting for a new vessel to appear so it can enter it, its a divine connection that has been made between you two, it chose you. It knows its not your fault at all that the vessel didnt make it, because sometimes bad things happen, so dont worry, its still there, waiting, that exact soul, it knows how much you want them. Dont tear yourself down for something thats natural and happens quite commonly, just because the vessel didnt make it doesnt mean the soul didnt. Its still here, and its just waiting for a good healthy vessel to reappear in. It will happen, you just have to keep trying.

Your rainbow baby will come.

As someone who has been trying to have a baby for almost 3 years, my heart breaks for you. In April I had a chemical pregnancy and even that loss was almost unbearable. I wish I had the words to ease your pain. If you want someone to talk to, feel free to message me. You are not alone. <3

I am so very sorry for your loss. You're right, the only ones who can truly understand what you're feeling right now are those who have experienced it themselves. It can be a hard concept for people to sympathize with, and it can lead them to say some very insensitive things, even when they're trying to be supportive. I'm sorry you have to deal with that on top of everything.

You don't want to hear: "Just relax and it'll happen", "You can always try again", "You still have plenty of time!", or any of the other "advice" and "encouragement" that comes when people don't understand how to comfort someone who is struggling with infertility or suffering a miscarriage. None of those statements acknowledge the fact that you have been fighting, for years, yearning for a child that seems out of reach. Then, when you finally do get everything you ever wanted, it's swiftly taken from you. You are mourning your baby, as well as mourning the future you have been hoping and dreaming for, long before even becoming pregnant. It's only natural to feel heartbroken, and betrayed by your own body.

I know exactly how you feel, as I have been there myself, more than once. That kind of pain doesn't just go away. But you cannot blame yourself for it. It's easy to, but you must know it is not your fault. Nothing you did made this happen, and chances are nothing you could have done would have prevented it. That doesn't make it easier, but I want you to keep repeating it to yourself until you know it to be true. It. Is. Not. Your. Fault.

If you have people around you that you trust, I strongly encourage you to open up to them about how you're feeling and what you've been going through. You might be surprised at how many of them will be able to sympathize on a personal level. Infertility and miscarriage are rarely talked about, but are more common than one might think. You are not alone, and you shouldn't have to feel like you are.

Again, I am so sorry you are going through this. I wouldn't wish this kind of pain on anyone, and my heart goes out to you. <3

I'm really sorry for your loss. I've never experienced this and I can't imagine the slightest bit what this feels like, but my heart goes out to you. The best advice I could probably give you is to let yourself grieve. Don't force yourself to move on. Acknowledge your feelings and wallow in them and just grieve. You are not alone in your feelings. With time, you will find the strength to pick yourself up and you will be able to look back on this without feeling much pain. But that time won't come for awhile. And it might sound silly, but it might help to gain some closure, perhaps by doing some sort of private ceremony for the lost soul. With no one else, just yourself.

I am so sorry for your loss. I experienced a miscarriage last month in July. I haven't really been able to tell many people so I can understand feeling like you need to share it, even if it is online to people you don't know. It sucks, a lot. It has been hard for me to feel like other people who have had a miscarriage even know what I'm dealing with. The physical pain is rough too.

My heart goes out to you. Just know that your feelings are real and valid. Try not to force yourself to move on, your grief has a will of its own and will do what it wants. Please try not to be too hard on yourself.

I had a miscarriage back in 2014, and though I can't understand where you're coming from in terms of trying for a wanted child, I know just how wrong a miscarriage can feel.

I am so sorry for your loss. Please know that you didn't do anything wrong and that this isn't your fault. Nature can be kind, but it can also be really cruel. My thoughts go out to you, and I hope that you'll finally have the child that you've wanted for so long, healthy and happy, in your arms very soon.

I am so sorry for your loss. Take the time to grieve and process your loss. Talking is therapeutic.

I had a miscarriage before the birth of my son, and then one after. It's something that will stay with me for the rest of my life.

Thanks all for the kind words xx

I've been on and off with my moods.. hard to believe it's been 5 weeks now.

I find myself blaming myself A LOT. It all starting happening the day after we were in a minor crash that ended up writing off our car - and I was the one that wanted to go out that day. If we'd just stayed home maybe everything would have been ok. Physically I was fine after the crash but the shock I was in can't have been good for me.

The support I had afterwards from doctors/hospital was so crap that I honestly wished I had bothered with them and just let everything happen at home alone.

I'm struggling with being social. Going outside is hard because I know the second I step out it's pregnant women and babies everywhere. I was meant to visit family the weekend just gone but I had to cancel. :(

A tiny part of me feels like I can't feel much lower than this so the only way must be up? Guess we'll see

I am deeply sorry for your loss. Please do not feel like it is your fault. I like to always tell my friends something I was told along time ago when I recently lost a loved one (I by no means am religious at all it was just kind words that helped me grieve), "God just had plans for them, and he needed them a lot sooner than he though".

With those kind parting words, I really hope you do find peace in this mourning process, and if you need a shoulder to cry on this stranger is here with two ears ready to listen.

I can't even begin to imagine how you must feel, but I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. It can be hard to believe sometimes,but it really wasn't your fault at all. These things just happen and yes, it isn't fair at all. Take all the time you need to grieve, there is no set time limit on these things. It might take months, maybe years but that's okay. I don't believe anyone ever truly 'moves on' from these things, instead we simply come to peace with it. Now is the time to focus on healing, stay inside cuddled up in blankets, wear pjs all day, watch all your favourite shows and eat way too much ice-cream. All the little things that make you feel happy. If you have someone to open up to, please do so. Sob together, get it all out, scream if you need to. Honestly, no-one will blame you.

That future you envisioned is still possible, it will happen, your time will come and when it does, you will shine!

I'm so sorry for your loss. Going through loss is difficult and your feelings are validated. What happened was not your fault, so I hope you don't blame yourself. Take time to grieve and it's okay to allow yourself to grieve. Give yourself time to heal before going out and being social. I would suggest finding a therapist and have them help you through this difficult time. Therapy has always helped me during difficult times.

Oh, luv... I'm so sorry. It's not your fault, no matter what others may say. I can't even begin to imagine how horrific that must feel for you, I wish I could offer some solace. Other than give yourself a chance to mourn.

Maybe check online to see about groups for mothers who have miscarried? It might help some.

Be strong. <3 It won't stop hurting but it won't hurt so badly later on.

I had never had this happen - so take my words with a grain of salt and just someone who wants to help someone else. ❤️

I am SO sorry for what has happened to you. The best thing is finding support groups, whether online or in person to talk about it. It's good to hit familiar ground with other women who have experienced this. Finding someone to talk with it that understands is healthy and lets your voice be heard.

ALSO - remember is it OKAY to BE SAD, and ANGRY, and SCARED... let your emotions flow.. flow like a river... own them.. make them your armor. But never let the negativity consume you. Take this as a chance for growth and renewal. I was never one to believe "things happen for a reason" and more so "things happen because things happen." Take what you have overcome... and use it to guide others and help other. That's what I believe.

MUCH LOVE, and STRENGTH to you.

sending you much love and kind thoughts. that kind of loss is so unbelievably heartbreaking.

my freshman year of college i got pregnant (by accident) and soon after i miscarried, i was around 15 weeks. i felt so hollow and my boyfriend at the time was completely unsupportive about it. it put me in a very dark place in my life.

it takes a while but you will heal, go to therapy, or support groups, or try anything online. good luck to you.

Thank you xx

still struggling I don't know how to give myself the push to actually get the help I need :(

I'm so sorry for your loss Cherry :( I had no idea!

My ex and I tried to conceive for roughly 3-4 years. During that time, I had 2 blighted ovums that I didn't find out about until my 12 week ultrasounds, as my doctor wouldn't do one earlier. Then, after a failed round of Clomid+IUI, we moved on to our first ICSI cycle. It was successful and we got to hear the heartbeat 3 different times. Then, without warning, I had a miscarriage in the middle of the night during a blizzard on the day I would have been 10w. It was all fairly traumatic, and our next 2 rounds of ICSI both failed. We stopped trying at that point, and we're no longer together. Not because of that though.

Anyway, point being, I know the pain you're feeling. I know how easy it can be to blame yourself and feel like you're all alone in the world. I remember lying on the floor, sobbing so loud and so hard that it hurt, just asking over and over again what I did to deserve what happened. Promising I would be a good mom if I got the chance. And, as an atheist, I'm not sure who I thought I was talking to. I guess just trying to bargain with the universe out of desperation. My nursery was set up, and it became almost impossible for me to go into it anymore. It sucked to have a 2 bedroom house with an entire room that I couldn't bring myself to enter most days.

The bright side, if there is one, is that the pain eventually fades. I mean, it never completely leaves. It's been almost 7 years since my last loss, and I still had to wipe away a tear that threatened to fall. BUT! For the last several years, the anniversary of my 10w loss has passed without me remembering on the right day. I can see pregnant women without feeling a sharp pain in my heart now. I've found a way to be happy for people who have succeeded where I did not. And that all means that healing is possible.

I really wish this was where I could give you my shocking, twist ending, success story, but I can't. I'm now happily married to another woman, and we aren't really looking to conceive at any point in the future. I've found other things that make my life feel full, and I've stopped telling myself that I will never have 'enough' if I don't have a child.

I really hope you get your rainbow baby, and I'm exceptionally comfortable talking about my rocky past with conception, fertility treatment, and pregnancy. If you ever wan to talk privately, I absolutely welcome you to message me. And, in the meantime, I'm sending you all the positive, healing, comforting vibes I possibly can. I believe in you, and you will get through this. <3

I am so sorry for your loss. My close friend has had 12 miscarriages, the last one being just a few weeks ago. She is gutted. You are definitely not alone. <3