Tbh I just need people to talk to who feel the same way.

I just went through a break up, which I shouldn't be that sad about because our relationship wasn't that great anyway like we weren't meant to be, we weren't gonna get married, and I realize that, but... I'm over here still sad. Cuz like... that was a good year of my life that's gone now? And tbh I don't even know if we can be friends. Like we never started as friends, we were always very cutesy and cuddly from the beginning. So like, idk how to be friends with him? Or like what would we even do????? (tbh that's another whole thing with why it wasn't working but IDK IT WAS COMFORTABLE HAVING SOMEONE THERE THINKING OH MAYBE THINGS WILL GET BETTER IDK) So like I'm gonna miss all of that. LIKE I HAVE HAD RELATIONSHIPS BEFORE I KNOW I WILL FIND SOMEONE AGAIN. But I'm getting older and it's getting harder for me to even try. Plus that doesn't make this any less sad right now, you know?

And my "best friend" hasn't really talked to me at all the past few months. And hasn't said ANYTHING to me in almost two weeks? Like not responding to my texts. Not answering my calls. And I know she is doing okay like she was posting on Facebook and stuff so I'm like ?????? wtf is happening?

And on top of that, I'm over here, a 25 year old college student, and I don't know how to make friends. Most of my good friends are honestly from Subeta, and live forever away, and it's just sad. I don't really have anyone nearby. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO BE A PEOPLE PERSON. OR MAKE FRIENDS. So I'm over here lonely af and confused about my life and like what even is the point of me?

And I graduate college in a year, and I have no real experience in my field so I'm like "how am I going to find a job" like I can't even find an internship right now. AND INTERNSHIPS COST MONEY?????????? LIKE I DON'T HAVE MONEY FOR BEING ALIVE IT'S SO STRESSFUL

And then the overwhelming shadow of my loans are looming over me, like I will have to start paying by 2019 ad that's so soon and I'm like "wow I'm never gonna be able to afford these I am going to literally live with my parents until they die or I die"

TL;DR I'm having a quarter life crisis.

dsklfhjsdkfjdskfjsdklfj I feel the same way about the future. My situation is different, in that I've been in the military for the past five years of my life, and I'm going to have to go back to school and learn how to be a student again. I don't have any irl friends close by. All of them are in other states, and I'm lucky if I get to see them once a year. All of my other friends are online and I met them through FFXIV or discord servers. I get how you feel about having to talk to people and make friends again, and fears of the future just piling up on you like rocks until you feel crushed. It seems like any time you are finally comfortable with whatever you're doing, whether it's school, a job, living location, etc it something happens and it requires to change whatever you've been doing.

Sometimes all you can do is plan for what you can and hope that things work out. But then my mind asks, "but what if things end poorly?!" UGGGGGGH

Saaaaame. I feel you, and you definitely have my support and my supportive feels? I'm sorry, I suck at wording things sometimes. I get it, though. I'm 24, have an associates degree in a field I realized I don't want to be in, and I'm stuck in a small, shit ass town because I don't drive and you need money to move, but YOU NEED A JOB TO GET MONEY. And I'm only working part time for minimum wage, so like how am I supposed to save money??

UGH.

I feel you so much. As for your relationship, I know I don't know the situation fully, but from the sound of it I would say don't try to be friends with him. It sounds awkward and unneccesary. As for the bestie, that's super odd and I'm not sure. Does she ever ignore you if she's unhappy with you?

Dude. Your first paragraph hit HOME with me so hardcore. I totally get what you are saying and Im having the same crisis right now. Like, I always knew it PROBABLY wasn't going to end in a fairy tale ending.... but it fucking hurts, you know? Hard for me to accept atm still. Im sorry you are going through this too, its feels weird and stings, I know :c

Also your best friend doesn't really sound like a best friend rn. Like thats so rude she would just blatantly ignore you?! I wouldnt hesitate to cut her off like she seemed to do with you :x Thats heartbreaking on top of losing a s/o

Most of my friends are on here too :x And it does suck when someone lives a bit aways from you.

I you wanna talk, I mean I know we arent the CLOSEST of friends. But I can relate with you, and im not shabby :p You can find me here or on skype, boo! <3

honestly, being a student is like.... distracting me from all my depression. I've been able to take all that emotional energy and focus on myself. And I've been /trying/ to plan for my future (finally looking into internships, scheduling classes for next year) so I think I'll be okay. What are you going back to school for?!? IMO being a student is much easier than being a real actual adult in the real world.

OKAY SO kinda off topic cuz I feel you on the part-time job thing... so my sister has literally been doing promotional events (brand ambassador for different companies, like super easy money). And she somehow saved up 24k? Like she hasn't had a normal stable job for years. IF YOU ARE GOOD AT TALKING TO PEOPLE, DEFINITELY DO THAT just to get some money saved up. I am terrible at it, but sometimes the jobs are really easy (I literally handed out Rolaids to people at an Italian food fest). Being stuck is the worst. :c

!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'm sorry you are going through the same kind of thing like I UNDERSTAND. IF YOU EVER WANNA TALK (cuz sometimes it's nice to talk to someone in the same place as you... vs like all these single happy bishes or people in relationships with other lovely people, u know??) Slowly I've been getting better. I've been trying to focus on getting my life together and that's mostly taken away from the sadness. Though lots of my sadness was from not having my life together and depending on my ex, sooo ya. It's all kinda working out. Finally got ahold of my friend too but ya at this rate, I'm kinda just... meh about all of that. Like the best friend bracelet she made me last year broke off last week and i was like FUCK IT and threw it out because I was so mad about all of it. Also ex and I having been talking a bit still. And we actually had an excellent deep conversation the other day (cuz okay he is a boy and a boy child and just not good at emotions) so it took what, a few weeks after we broke up to talk stuff out? And everything is mostly okay now. I was like "just treat me like one of your friends and whatever happens, happens... either we will decide we work after time or eventually i won't give af anymore" and he was like "okay ya that's what i want" But tbh I don't really suggest ever doing that. I am very detrimental to my own emotional health and make poor decisions but whatever gets me by IDK. this has become rambling.

if you ever wanna talk too you can also comment/message/skype me ! (you are always away on skype... and tbh i'm not on skype often anymore)

omg so much of what you said sounds so much like what I have also gone through. I also had a relationship for about a year with a guy I was engaged to and he just randomly decided to give up on me with no real reasoning and gave me no chance to try and fix it. I am also in the same boat as you on seriously having no idea how to make new friends. I moved recently and the 2 friends I had irl I now have no contact with and I've been finding it extremely difficult to find anyone to be friends with even online. But I guess I could say, I'd be more than happy to be your friend if you want? I seriously have had such little social interaction I don't know just how awkward that is right now but I figure I can try anyway. It just seems you could use a friend and even though I'm akward and weird and don't know how to react to some things properly I am typically a very friendly person.