Where do I start? A few months ago I accepted a position as a supervisor at my job, which really, with the way my workplace is, I should have known it wouldn't be fun. But hey, increased pay, and it looks pretty good on a resume-especially since it's my first job and they promoted me to supervisor 6 months into it. And I figured it would be okay since the other supervisors like me, and I thought "Maybe they'll actually train me, unlike when I first started."

I was wrong, about the latter anyways. Which is the first level of what's troubling me. They gave me the base amount of information I'd need to run a shift, but left out a lot of stuff that was fairly important. I can't tell you how many times another supervisor has come to me and been angry being like "Why didn't you do this? This needed to be done." And It's like, I didn't even know that was a thing that existed at this shop, let alone that I was supposed to do it because NO ONE told me. Or I've done things and they've been like, you aren't supposed to do that, and it's like, well, it would've been nice if I had at least a list of things I'm not supposed to do. They leave out pretty big things, and while I am supposed to be able to take initiative and make decisions, I feel like it's unfair of them to get mad at me when I don't do exactly what they want, when I never got told how to handle certain situations.

Also, I am usually the manager that closes. No matter what I do, how much I do, how much I make sure is done. They always find something. I come into a list of tiny little things that were off, such as maybe I missed a rag that was tucked away on the counter, or sometimes there are things on the list that I KNOW were not there. A good example, is that a common complaint is that there were fries all over the floor, which was probably the case the first few times because I wasn't trained in the kitchen so I just trusted that the cooks were doing it. But now I check, I check everything I make sure everything is clean before I leave. And yet, hmm, somehow in the morning they come in to it being a "complete mess".

And I will admit, I do miss things sometimes, I'm not saying I am perfect. But it's the way they tell me, in a super condescending tone, as if they never do wrong. And I can't tell you how many times I have come in in the morning, on the occasions I do work in the mornings, and have had to deal with lack of stocking and messes that were left behind by their night shifts. They act like I am the only one doing wrong, and yet, I've lost count of how many times I've had to do the work they didn't do during their shifts, and how often they leave things in shambles for my night crew to deal with.

Anytime anything goes wrong, they assume it's me. Even if it wasn't my shift. and there was even one time a manager came up to me and told me something was wrong this morning, and when I told her that I hadn't worked in two days, so I don't know why she was mad at me, since it didn't happen on my shift and wasn't my fault, she said "But it still is your fault, because overall you aren't mean enough to your crew." Like what?

I've talked to the head boss about it, but it kind of seems like she is listening to the other supervisors more than me, and part of me feels like it's because I am younger. It's a he said she said kind of deal right now. I am friends with the last supervisor, whose position I took when he left, and he said they did the same thing to him, and regardless of what he did they still said he was a bad supervisor. And another manager who used to work there, who is an older woman and was probably one of the strictest managers, AND was the only one who has actually seen me work an entire shift on numerous occasions before she left, was telling me I was doing completely fine and that the kitchen isn't any worse when I close the building than it is when the other supervisors do it. If anyone was going to complain about how I do things, I would expect it to be her before any of the other supervisors.

Anyways, I am rambling. I don't understand why this is bothering me so much. I know I need to just let it go, and not let it bother me, but I can't get my anxiety to stop. And I know I need to find another job, I have been job hunting lately, but not a lot of places around me are hiring right now, and if they are it's for part time and minimum wage... and I just can't afford that right now. So until I can find a full time job that will at least cover my bills, I am stuck at this place.

I have to be at work in an hour, and I am just dreading going in because I know I will go in to a list of all my wrongdoings from last night, even though I specifically fine tooth combed that place. I just don't know what to do. I don't know how to get myself to stop being so anxious about it, and to just let it go. But it sucks to walk in everyday to my coworkers glaring at me, and getting a stern talking to for asinine stuff.