idk what to do

i just turned 21, i have a boyfriend of 7 months, work a part-time job... and have no friends.

i have always been terrible about reaching out to people (and i struggle finding things to talk about, too -- just holding a decent conversation can be hard).. and usually i would have a friend or two, either online or irl, that i could hang out with. but now i have pretty much nobody. i feel like i've lost connections with 100% of my friends, especially online. the friends i have irl are usually busy with work or.. hanging out with their other friends. sometimes i get invited out, but when i would, it was usually the night before i worked so i couldn't go out. all my hobbies.. art, roleplaying, videogames.. i don't really have anybody to talk to about them. my bf sure but he doesn't really "get" it and that's fine, but i'm really lonely.

i've tried making friends with girls my age (because honestly that's what i really want, irl at least) at my job but they either have best friends and don't want to hang out or chat with me...but neither do a bunch of people online, that i already have on my contacts list, it seems..?

idk i'm really hurt by how lonely i feel. and with my anxiety + depression (possibly bipolar?? idk) it's hard to reach out, and i'm tired of trying to reach out and getting nothing in return?? what should i do? what can i do to distract myself?

Let me reach out to you. I have a few friendship groups on Skype and would love for you to join them. My friends and I aren't the most talkative bunch these days, because of school and work and life, but when we do chat, then we all get along like a house on fire. You are more than welcome to join us, even if you're quiet for a little while. Everyone deserves to have positive and caring friends.

What kind of video games do you enjoy? We play games a lot, together and individually, and our interest in video games differ a lot. Sometimes, as a group on Skype, we'll play games like Fibbage, Town of Salem, Quiplash, or Minecraft. Fun interactive games that let us have a laugh for a little while.

If it doesn't work out, then that's okay. I can see that you've really tried in the past and you deserve something to come from your proctivity. My Skype username is superwolfz and my display name currently is Hot Milky.

(And @ any staff, please forgive me if this isn't allowed. I'm just trying to help out and mean nothing malicious by sharing this information.)

I am in the same boat as you! Maybe we can be friends?

You spoke how I feel 99% of the time. I'm glad I'm not the only one. If often bothers me... If you want we can chat. We can talk about anything at all ^_^

I suppose many poeple appreciate it, when you invite their group and you listen. To tell directly about yourself is not always necessary. I think there must be the space for the possibility all things comes at it's good, own, undependent moment. That's why I don't like conversations in a kring group. Because it strikes me as forced and unnatural. As if somewhere must unnecessary make hurry for the know who is who as quick as possible. I don't like that kind of way's.

There are people who believe have got much friends and the kind of job they give them a kind of a social status and they are only busy with that. I'm more interested what inspire somebody personal and what his/her vision is. That's on my opinion much more personal and more interesting than seeking to each other social status and judge about. So superficial I think.

You can by just listen and watch to others, discover who could be interested enough for you to come back again. It's not about what others think about you, but what you think about where you could feel comfortable with.

hi! i'm also a 21 year old girl in a similar situation, but without a boyfriend. actually on that note, i've been in this situation since the relationship with my last boyfriend ended..2 years ago :x eek. but back when i did have close friends, i met them through classes/clubs. how long have you been working at your job for? maybe your anxiety has skewed your perception/made the possibility of rejection seem worse than it really is, like maybe there's a coworker or two or more that would be receptive? if not, maybe start with people in your bf's circle of friends? what are his friends like? also, that meetup website thing seems cool, i haven't actually tried it yet though. (& antidepressants/anxiety meds are good)

i'm down to be friends online or IRL if you live anywhere near texas!

- i met the creators of town of salem last year, cool dudes ! (i live in the same town as them)

I am incredibly jealous! It's one of my favourite games. (If you have an account, feel free to add me. Same username as here.) ;)

& if y'all want you can send me a smail and we can chat c:

most of what i do is watch/listen to other people. there are people i am interested in being friends with, but they seem to have had no interest in being my friend. so it kinda does matter what people think of you..

i've been working at my job for 2 years now. most of the friends i had there have moved away, and when i try to keep in contact with them, they don't seem very receptive. the girls at work i'd like to be friends with are nice to me, but they are kinda "cliqueish"""" (or w/e) and i don't want to intrude or anything :x (if that makes sense??) ... my boyfriend is in the military, and so are his friends. i've gone out with him to hang out with them and stuff, but they're all guys and given my bf's history, i'm not too intent on becoming friends with his coworkers. i am on antidepressants + a slew of other medicines haha

I'm sorry for you, you feel rejected, but I'm still not sure if this is always the real case. May be other people are just also shy.

frown Have they say it to you to don't want to be your friend or is it more they give you that feeling?

I consider you could at least get friends with Alesana and CuddlesTHEgohst :D

awww...well if theyre clique-ish then you prob don't wanna be friends w them anyways :/

ooOo what branch of the military is your bf in? how long is he planning to stay in? and considering the marine corps took my WoW & LoL-playing, anime loving, magic collecting brother and turned him into a car obsessed workout-aholic, i can understand why you wouldnt want to be friends w your boyfriends friends haha (or the girls that hang out around them, who half the time are just looking to get in on the benefits...) ps i am also on antidepressants + a slew of other meds :b

also, one last idea, maybe re-connecting with people you knew in highschool?

they could be shy, they just give me that feeling that they don't want to be friends

heeee's in the air force, just re-enlisted so he'll be in for another 5 1/2 years, at least. he's all about guns, cars, and videogames lol. his friends are really nice but my bf's ex(es) cheated on him with (several) of what used to be close/best friends, so i don't want to make him worry about anything like that happening!! also lol yes dependas, i hear soooo much about them (mainly mean jokes, but, yeah)..

reconnecting i would do but i didn't really have many friends in high school! i have a couple that i still talk to, but they're pretty busy with work/other things most of the time... i found out a lot of other people i was friends with, were toxic people : but i'd rather have no friends than bad friends, yknow??

- I can understand the loneliness and hard to reach out thing. I also have anxiety, depression, and possible bi-polar. (Yay for meds. XD) I'm awful at keeping up with others. And, I have a hard time becoming close with people since I have a strong fear of getting hurt.

I can be very kind and silly to the majority of people. I am quite busy during the weekdays this summer, but I'm up for a chat when I'm on here. ^^

I'm 29 with no boyfriend, or friends for that matter. I also have a hard time reaching out to people IRL and finding things to talk about. Most of the time, I just feel awkward.

Don't feel lonely. There are lots of us out there!

I know the feel. Reaching out is kind of hard, . I almost crept off into the shadows without replying, because yep anxiety and depression over here too but I thought what the heck.

I don't have any instant messengers or anything, but I'm totally open to S-mail or if you want to shoot me a friend request.

I'm a little older than twenty-one, but I like role-play, and I like hearing people talk about the video games they like.

I suggest try making friends online first! It's always a lot easier and you can start chatting it up regularly! There is no source of appearance judgement that usually goes on when you meet someone online! Subeta has such a support and open-minded community of wonderful people. I would love to be your friend if you ever wanted! You can always sMail me c: ❤️

I've honestly always been the same way and as long as you have one or two good friends, sometimes it's all you need. 2 of my best friends cut me out recently so I've been struggling to reach out to new people as well and build new relationships. Having a boyfriend is great, the longer you guys date I'm sure he'll introduce you to all of the people in his life too.

But having a job is a great tool- I met some of my closest friends through my old job. My most recent job wasn't so lucky, but at least socializing at work gave me a chance to be social, even if those relationships didn't go anywhere. Start small with coworkers. If you guys have things in common. Ask how their weekend was, if they did anything fun comment on that (even if it's not something you would typically do, be open and positive!). If you have Snapchat or Instagram, maybe try and add them that way. I have lots of coworkers who I don't hangout with much but it's still fun to chat with each other through social media and keep a tiny relationship that way.

Also, even if people go out late the night before work, no matter how exhausting it is, go anyway! Even if it's just for an hour to make an appearance, trust me, people will appreciate the effort and be happy that you came! And then once you know those people better you can branch into maybe doing things you want to do or making your own plans instead of hanging out later at night. Just some ideas.

If you're in college, join a sports class. Even if you hate sports, just do it, I swear lol. I hate sports but I took an aerobics class and a beginner soccer class on a whim and 2 of the girls from my soccer class ended up getting along really well because we were all awful at socccer and just wanted to have fun and a year later I go on hikes every once in a while and things like that with them still.

I'm currently on antidepressants as well for depression/anxiety and sometimes I do feel like an outsider because I don't always have the energy other people do, but I have to remind myself that if I say 'no' to too many invites or don't push myself then I'll never feel better. It's hard to be social and branch out sometimes but whenever you feel able to, it is so worth it (: