i feel so silly, but i fed my pet a sex berry to try to change my pet from a male to a female, and my pet is still a male. should i of 'given' the item instead of 'feeding' it to my pet?

Yes, you need to use the "Use on" option, feeding just feeds your pet like any other food.

cool, thanks! will make note of that next time. minor oops on my part :) hehe