:c deleting.. thank you for your responses! i am taking some time to mull things over to find out what is best for my future.

Well, I will say the positive things first. You sound like a very empathetic and caring person. The problem is you probably dote on people more than they deserve or appreciate it. I think you can only be friends with this guy. Anything more and you will be hurting yourself.

You said, "I've ALWAYS had feelings for him, but dismissed them because I didn't want to ruin anything," which is a really big red flag. You kept doing something not wholly satisfying out of fear, which means you are in denial about what you need from a relationship.

And as for him, he's a sex addict who needs to either be in therapy or spend a great deal of energy on self-help books and changing his behavior in significant ways.

Also, the idea that these problems will go away once you move in is entirely false. They will get worse. Relationships are always more complicated when you share a space with someone.

So, I really wouldn't recommend continuing a relationship with this guy beyond one of friendship. You guys both need time to figure out what you need from sex and romantic relationships. If the sex stuff starts up again, you need to be strong and walk away. If you get confused just ask yourself, "Am I doing this to make someone else happy? Does doing this thing actually satisfy me?" If you can't say yes, don't do it.

I'm going to have to agree with the above poster. I've been dealing with my significant other as they go through therapy. However, I knew at the beginning of our relationship that he had anxiety and bouts of depression so I knew what that would entail so far as how we deal with issues like fights, how medication makes him feel, etc. However, even then I have taken steps back to think. I've thought a lot about what I need for my mental health and have established serious boundaries. I can tell from your post, you're not giving yourself what you need. You seem like someone who is really kind and loyal, but also not selfish enough for themselves. I think the best thing to do is take a break from your relationship. Instead of hanging out to do physical things, make time to speak with each other. Set realistic goals for both yourself and the relationship. If you're questioning whether it is good for your health then obviously some issues are present. Maybe even don't talk for a week? Addiction to these things can be very grave. I have been in a relationship with an abuser of narcotics before and would be okay speaking about people with addictions. However, the best advice I can give you is step away for a second. Whether taking an actual break or just sitting down one day to write some lists or a journal entry and ask yourself what you really need.