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Feb 7, 2015 11 years ago
Azure_977
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I've seen the news of similar incidents being much more worse than mines but I became so miserable because of one teacher. If this is too long, scroll down to TL;DR but below is my evidence.

I'm currently under my second semester in my high school senior grade. There was this one particular teacher (lets call him Mr. M) who would pick on me or give me rude vibes. The course was Co Operative Education for those who don't know what it is; its basically getting students to the workforce and gaining experience from it. You're basically working but not getting paid. Majority of students get summer jobs of out it though and great on resumes.

So Mr. M and I arranged an appointment during first semester to discuss which type of work place I'd go, etc. I accidentally forgot about the appointment though because culminating assignments and exams; my music course had me prepare a solo recital as an exam. I didn't think it was a big deal because there was no rush in planning.

One day I was on my way to the bathroom during my lunch period and I ran into him. He reprimanded me that I was ignoring and avoiding him on purpose because of our appointment. I didn't but I apologized anyways. Mr. M then said we should meet up after school to discuss. I said, "Okay" as in something you normally say when you understand. But then he half shouted, "its not okay!" I couldn't believe how immature he was acting. Only kids reply like that, not full grown adults.

This week was the first week of the semester and it has been hell. He picked on me a lot and made me into a laughing stock for my peers. We were taking up a quiz and he suddenly called for me but I didn't know I was the one to answer. He didn't call me by my name but by a nickname (my friends never called me something like that before). Since I said nothing, Mr. M said to the class "the answer is sitting quietly at your desk." He had people giggling.

There was several work sheets and forms that needed to be collected. Mr. M always collected it himself but he never takes my sheets. There was also an assignment the class isn't suppose to look at yet but I looked at it anyways. He only explained it at the end of class. Then he rambled on to the class that I already looked at it.

There was a time where I had to get a field trip form signed and asked him politely. He stared at my sheet then looked at me as he sneered, "I don't sign contracts written in pencil. You can always erase it and change it into something different." Did he think I was deceiving him?! Do I look shady?

TL;DR - He made me feel miserable and uncomfortable. I've cried long enough and resulted in self-harm. (I'm not looking for pity, I have a long history of depression and self-harm.) I've already submitted a course change request but its not going to take a day to be solved. There are many students who have course change requests too. I assume I'll be stuck with him for quite a while. I need help on how to deal with him if he picks on me again. How do I cope with this emotionally?

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Feb 7, 2015 11 years ago
Riptide
will never conform to your genres, man!
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Aros

Contracts/forms written in pencil is sketch, yo. :P

On a serious note, if I'm ever in a situation where I feel bullied, the first thing I'd do is talk to the teacher that is making me feel that way. I don't know if you've done that yet or not, but if not, start there. It's not uncommon for teachers to pick on their students...at least, based on my experiences. We're all build differently, I guess. I've never felt like when teacher picked on me or gave me a hard time in class that they were bullying me, though, but if you're getting that vibe, definitely talk with your teacher. I definitely never had a teacher that turned me into a joke...mostly me turning myself into a joke, haha. Tell him how you feel. If he's professional, he'll stop. Sometimes, we don't realize our actions can cause suffering to others. I know I've been guilty of that before.

If that fails, talk with another adult. A counselor, your parents, or another teacher. Inform the principal. It's not okay for a teacher (or anyone) to make you feel like you're being bullied. Call him out on it. Situations like this is not something to just silently sit through and hope for the best. It's always good to take action. Not saying anything to anyone is only saying that it's okay for the teacher to behave like that when it's not. Small hurtful comments/actions can escalate into something bigger if left unchecked. Also, do not let it phase you. I know that's easier said than done, but just know that you are better than him if he's really that petty. Life is full of dicks, just pretend this is training for the real world. Sometimes, we just have be thick-skinned. Just remind yourself that the situation is only temporary. Soon, he'll be irrelevant. If him picking on you is affecting how you're doing in that class, you should definitely complain to the principal.

I don't really have any good advice on how to cope because I believe that you shouldn't have to. It is not something you should have to cope with. However, I find that writing has always been a good way for me to deal with stuff emotionally. I'm sure someone will come along with better advice, but I just wanted to make sure that you're just not keeping all this to yourself. I think a lot of teens can tell you how someone or certain aspects of high school have made them miserable, so it's somewhat relate-able. The key is to have people to talk to, be it parents, good friends, or total strangers on Subeta. On the bright side, senior year, almost done with high school! Congrats :P


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Feb 7, 2015 11 years ago
far
is a gold digger
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Fartsie

Be a little shit - Record him and never be alone with him (try to bring a friend, see the difference).

Gather proofs of his behaviours, it's vital. You'll need to meet with your principal, are you parents in touch with the current situation?

I'm going to give you a slice of life here. However, I'm sarcastic and terribly witty and I take no shit from anyone. Last semester, I had an history teacher that kept babying me. Always pushing me to get better grades and he even forced me to get help. I had none of it. I simply stayed after class and stood for myself. He then left me alone.

This semester, my english teacher is being very rude and nosy with sarcastic remarks. Again, I just talkback because I will not let anyone talk like that to me.

You do not have to cope with it??? Why the hell would you cope with someone being a bag of shit? Especially since he's in a position of "authority".

And lol, the pencil story. My mom used to sign my school forms with a freaking pencil. Wtf man.

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Feb 8, 2015 11 years ago
Dandelina
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Atroxx

He doesn't sound very nice, but you don't seem to be taking the class seriously either, and the way you've phrased things makes you sound like you have an attitude that you're not meaning to have. You have a history of depression, what does your therapist/doctor think of all this? If you don't have one, you need to make that your priority.

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Feb 9, 2015 11 years ago
Azure_977
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Thank you for both of your advices. I'll take them into consideration. I have a boost in confidence, reading your responses!

I do take it seriously but not too my full potential. How can I focus when I'm distracted with such thoughts? I'm not the usual 'hide-it-behind-a-smile' person. I just act... dead and quiet. I'm aware of the attitude I give off but those were never expressed outside of me. Only contained and on this certain forum. My doctor has said to let it go and don't waste time on the issue. But that's not how you solve depression.

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Feb 9, 2015 11 years ago
Dandelina
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Atroxx

Well, actually that is the right advice, thinking about these things and dwelling on them, instead of just changing behaviors, is not going to help. Unfortunately tough love is the only option, because once you get out of high school, you are truly on your own.

Are you being treated behaviorally or just with medication?

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Feb 10, 2015 11 years ago
Evanesce
is a mirage
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Gather evidence of his behavior and present it to your parents and his superiors. No matter what your attitude, no matter what you do, he is an adult in a position of authority and responsibility and should never abuse that. His attitude is clearly causing issues with your schooling and cannot be allowed to continue.

As for depression, it actually does help to see the issue as something that doesn't matter in the long run. That's not to say don't attempt to solve the problem, but in addition to pursuing a solution you also have to realize that he is a minor part of your life. Someday - muuuuch sooner than you think - you will be gone and he will be left behind forever. Don't carry small people with you.

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Feb 12, 2015 11 years ago
Tomorrow
has seen too much
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Get transferred out of the class if at all possible. I had something like that... sorta, happen- there was this teacher who regularly gave me lower grades for the exact same work as other students. Like, a whole letter grade lower. I think she had a problem with my handwriting. Anyway, I told the school counsiler and he changed who's class I was in then and there when I was signed up for her class again {English teacher- I had her as a Freshman and ALMOST had her again as a junior.} A year later the teacher died of breast cancer.

Anyway, like others suggested, seriously, talk to another adult. The school counsiler would probably be your best option, but a teacher you trust or even a vice would work just as well.

Oh, and if you want to be a real douche to him, record it and post it on youtube :P


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