Ever since my 20th birthday in August, I can't stop dwelling on the fact that I'm not a kid anymore, and that things might go downhill from here. I just want to be able to accept that I'm getting older, but I don't know how. Like, I'm not super depressed or anything but when I'm alone I just think: cool- I'm getting uglier, I'm almost done the best years of my life, my childhood pets are gonna die soon, my grandparents too, I don't necessarily know if what I'm majoring in is what I want to do for the rest of my life, what if I chose the wrong school? well it's too late now, my body is obviously starting starting to breakdown (however slowly) and etc.

I've started this really annoying and degrading habit of like, counting every single potential fine line forming whenever I look in the mirror and I swear sometimes I convince myself that I look like I'm 40 and it makes me sad and anxious that i'm not taking the best care of my body i could be. For real, i eat pretty well and am physically active and wear sunscreen every single day and moisturize my skin in moderation, and, all in all, I've got enough on my plate so how much more effort can I realistically put in to slow down the aging process. ): I've also started observing the fine lines and wrinkles everyone else has and can't help comparing myself to them in my mind- which is so cruel to the people around me, really.

Ultimately, it bothers me that I've developed this mindset at 20, because i KNOW i'm still young and i KNOW there are going to be things to look forward to in the future? Idk, anyone else feel like this? What is there to look forward to in getting older? How do I stop feeling this way cause it honestly is so icky, distressing and controlling and i'm only 20?

ping me!

Oh my god yes. You're not alone. I feel this too. I recently turned 25, and it's seriously making me anxious. I feel like I'm still 20. (Although, turning 20 made me anxious as well.) I think about my childhood and how much I miss it. Things are never going to be the same anymore.

I keep thinking about how my mom's twice my age and I compare myself to her - what she looked like when she was my age and where she was in her life. The first 25 years of my life have gone so fast and what if the next 25 years feel this short as well, and soon I'll be 50, wondering where the years went and still feeling like I'm just a kid.

And I feel like whenever I look in the mirror and wonder what age I look like, I moisturize my face just a bit more. It's so silly. .__.

So yeah, I have no idea how to help you, but I wanted to let you know that I'm struggling with this as well...

Getting older is inevitable, and sadly, you can't fight time. Moisturizer or no, haha!

Try to think of it like this, you have only lived approximately a 1/5th of your life (should you live until 100). Yeah, being younger was fun and great and carefree, but being older can be fun and a new adventure too. You get to put all that childhood experience and knowledge to use, and only expand your mind farther. Also it is never too late to decide what you want to do with yourself. I'm 23 and I still don't know what I really want to do, but I'm just trying to enjoy every day as it comes. Of course I sometimes get anxious about the future (I mean really, who doesn't), as we don't know what's going to happen, or who we'll meet, but the fact that you won't ever truly know is just a part of life.

And who says that your best years are almost over? You don't know what else you have to look forward to as you get older -- the best years could be waiting for you at 65 -- who knows? Dwelling on what was, and how things used to be is certainly no way to live (though I know how easy it is to get sucked in).

Also I'm really sorry that you genuinely feel this way about yourself, and I apologize for how cliche everything above sounds, but I believe it's true.

I used to feel like that when I was at university. I had a lot of free time and was dreading having to work full-time and fend for myself completely.

I'm almost 23 now and I'm the happiest I've ever been in my life. My job is crap pay and not related to my studies, but I don't hate it. I've got a car now and live with the man I love.

I mean, I know you're uncertain about careers and the like, but whatever you end up doing, are you not looking forward to starting somewhere new, maybe moving, meeting new people, changing jobs etc?

Also if you're worried about wrinkles, you can always get hold of some tretinoin (like a much stronger version of the Retinol used in expensive as fuck anti-aging creams).

I understand the feeling. But remember that you are still young. Everything that you have ever experienced, everything you know, has been within 18ish years. In that time you learned a whole language, learned concepts that humans couldn't comprehend 200 years ago. You get to live that 5 times over again. Look forward to drinking wine with your adult friends. Think of all the vacations and traveling you have yet to experience. And hey, wrinkles represent wisdom!

yeees things are going by so fast! hopefully the best years are ahead of us.

Thanks for the words of support, guys. I respect that you all know where I'm coming from, and I super appreciate your positive perspectves and advice.

Well, I'm 31 now and there was a point where I felt the same. Even now I am having to accept wrinkles where I didn't have wrinkles before and gray hairs (ugh). But, I can honestly say that right now is the best time of my life. There was a time where I felt like it was all just downhill from there-but now I look forward to seeing what the future holds because everything is going so well. I struggled with my career choice but I've had the same one for 10 years now and I still enjoy what I do.