Okay so let me break down the story :

First year in college and found my roommate on the college freshman class online page. I know I'm probably out of the norm for most people but I have always been a nerd on the inside and preppy girly girl on the outside. Safe to say I wanted to party it up in college and be all about that sorority life. When I found my roommate ( I'll name her Niki) online it was through a mutual agreement of these things. Finally when we make it to college I think I am the luckiest person alive. We go crazy party it up and form a trio with this other girl that I'll name...Aria. So me Niki and Aria are having the time of our lives the first semester. Niki has an easier major than me and Aria which allows her to maintain a decent GPA while me...not so much! Eventually Aria and Niki become estranged because of their clashing dominate personalities. Niki gets in a giant fight with Aria and I try to remain neutral. Next thing I know Aria begins to ignore me because of my close association with Niki, us being roomies and all. Since I had formed such a tight knit group with these girls I really didn't have any other friends, especially in all my classes which I sat exclusively next to Aria in. At first, I was so hurt with Aria for completely ignoring just because of what happened with her and Niki. I thought, if she is going to be like that with me she obviously isn't a true friend and its not worth it. Now I sit alone in all my classes and only have Niki to hang out with while everyone else in my school acts like I'm a piece of wallpaper. Second semester rolls around and our grades for the first semester are determined. Niki's GPA is high enough to rush in a sorority and surprise surpise mine isn't. I was crushed to say the least but had no one else to blame but myself. Niki went on ahead to rush without me and now is in one of the best chapters on campus. I'm so envious of her life. She went from having one friend (me) to having an entire sisterhood. Now she solely hangs out with her sisters while I sit alone in our room twiddling my thumbs. She involves me sometimes but I feel so out of place among her sisters and feel like she only invites me out because she feels responsible for what happened to me with Aria. SIDENOTE: scooped up all of these supporters in her cause against Niki and got all of these friends to stop talking to me and my roomie, so she's having the time of her life. I'm working extremely hard on my school work so that I can rush next semester and hopefully gain some friends. I told myself I would do the same thing Niki was doing if I was her and that I should be nothing but happy for her. Trust me, I've had to fake enthusiasm on the daily while she gushes to me about all the themed parties and bar nights she goes too. I've been nothing but supportive on the outside. On the inside I feel like crying constantly. I figured Niki wasn't inviting me to any parties that were open because there hadn't been any yet. But the other weekend there were open parties and I didn't get an invite. Instead Niki took her friend from home (who goes to a college around here but doesn't visit often even though they're "so close") out with her. I apologize for who ever took the time to read all of that, I understand its complicated and will probably seem completely superficial and pointless to some. But I just don't understand why she is pushing me away. I've been so nice and supportive for her! Why is she reaching out to her friend from home that she says she doesn't even like instead of me! What did I do wrong? Some outside perspective would be great, especially since my rope is wearing thin with her and I have to live with this chick next year!

Talking from experience, I find it's best to not live with your friends. However since it's too late, here's what I've got: Sometimes when people live together, they get tired of each other - not to the extent that they hate each other, but they tend to try to get space from them for at least a while. On top of that, Niki is probably enjoying all the attention. After a while of all this, when things aren't so busy, she'll get back to you. All I can suggest is to find friendship away from Niki and Aria. Not just that, but learn to love the time you spend with yourself.

Here's my advice, here. Don't drop Niki as a friend, but don't rely on her so much. You are an independent person, and you're both free to involve each other in your lives as closely or as separately as you two see fit. Obviously she's still your friend, and you shouldn't let your jealously tell you otherwise, but instead you should focus on your independence and making new friends to surround yourself with. Rushing for sororities isn't the only way to find a close-knit community - there are a multitude of clubs offered on many campuses, as well as volunteer opportunities that may fit your interests or work for your major! I really support you in looking for those alternatives while you're working out your time before you get Rush and find that community, too.

I hope things get worked out, but please don't let your friendship with Niki disappear because you're envious of her life. You can have it to, you just have to both be patient and get creative ❤

Do not drop Niki as a friend. It could be that she doesn't realize you feel so left out. Try talking to her about it. Let her know you still want to be friends but that sometimes you feel left out. That being said she may have invited the other girl because she's trying to reconnect with her. You said they used to be close. I've been there, I've tried reconnecting with old friends like that and sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. I guess what I'm getting at is talk to Niki. Tell her you enjoy being her friend and that you live together but again there are times you feel left out of things.

She may not just realize you feel so left out. A lot of times when roommates see each other daily, one of them may not realize the other is feeling left out of all the plans just because there is that daily face time to interact. Even if it's only a few minutes each morning or night. I doubt she's intentionally leaving you out. She just may feel that she sees you every day and maybe wants to reconnect with an old friend she was close to. Just talk to her about how you feel. Get involved in some clubs around campus too, that way you have more friends to hang out with and won't feel as left out of the scheme of things.

I sort of understand where Niki might be coming from. It's not that she doesn't like you, and it's not that she's ignoring you or thinks less of you, but I think part of it is that she knows it's not her job to hold your hand through everything. You are in college, I'm sure you realized now that it isn't a great idea to rely on JUST one person! She has gone out and made her own friends-- college is largely about independence and it seems like she's happy that she's created a new life for herself, while on the other hand you are just depending on her for your social life. Putting all of that pressure imo isn't fair to her, it is not her job to always be available. I understand why she might be pulling away a bit. I still think she can be a good friend, but I think you need to venture off on your own too and prove that you can make your own way.

If you cannot rush, then you should look into other clubs, organizations, or sports groups, etc. that also host events and parties. Try talking to more new people in your classes and see if they ever want to study together or hangout after class and get to know them-- perhaps they have friends they can introduce you too. The rule I've learned during college is do NOT take classes with your close friends. It sounds fun at first, but you don't network and meet new people that way-- you just stay with the same clique, and when that clique falls apart you're left with nobody. I used to take classes with my BF when we went to the same school and we realized very fast that taking every possible course together stunted us when it came to branching out and becoming more independent.

Just find other ways to get involved on campus. Spend more time hanging out in the library or other areas where people commonly hangout. Don't be shy in asking people in your classes if they want to form study groups as well-- most of the friends I've met have come through out-of-class study sessions that eventually turn into just chatting and getting to know each other. Getting more involved and spending time away from her will bring you guys closer in the end, imo!