So, just before Christmas, my uncle (step-mother's brother) was diagnosed with a little plethora of things (including cancer), and I got a call from my dad yesterday saying he only had probably a day or two left.

I'm totally terrified of this sort of thing. I love this uncle a lot, but death is something that I have never handled well.

I'm in college, which is ab out 45 minutes away, and I want to be home, but I'm an emotional wreck.

My biggest fear right now is that I will get home (where there are currently around... 10 people) and I will see my uncle (who can't respond to anything, but can hear) and I'll break down. I'm known for being a cry-baby, and being overly sensitive, and I'm really afraid right now, because I'm positive that everyone is trying to act happy right now to keep him from worrying about us.

I don't want to ruin that.

I can't handle seeing him, but I don't want people to think that I don't care.

I don't want to go home, because I'm terrified of what will happen when I get there.

I lost my boyfriend (who I'd been dating for almost four years) two years ago, and I'm still not over that..

This just sucks... and I don't know what to do...

I don't want people to think I don't care, and my dad is coming to see me after everything happens... but... this is just... crazy...

Edit: Apparently he passed away this morning... So nevermind.

I'm really sorry that he already passed away :( Are you okay?

I haven't been on the forums much lately but I did see this and just wanted I'm so sorry. If you need anything please ask :( I will be thinking about you!!

I don't know right now... Quite honestly... I lost my boyfriend two years ago to Myocarditis, and I wasn't expecting to lose someone else so soon.

Thank you very much, I greatly appreciate it.

I honestly wasn't expecting this sort of response, it means a lot to me. <3

Your kind of my Subeta family :)

That's a lot of loss. Have you talked to a therapist or anyone about it?

I'm so sorry to hear about everything that's going on, is there anyone you can talk to? Although you know you can always come on here and talk to SB, even if it's just to rant. I'm sorry you didn't get to resolve everything with your uncle, I had a similar issue with my Aunty two years ago, she went downhill so quickly and on the other side of the country I never got to say goodbye and never got a chance to go to the funeral. It will take a long time to heal but focus on any positives you have even if you think they are stupid little things, every happy moment, or even every ok moment is something positive and needs to be experienced to the full. I wish you every luck and sympathy with your situation, please let me know if there's anything I can do.