This is a somewhat rant... I'm not mad, just slightly irritated.

So, for those of you who don't know, I am a ballroom dancer (or was, I guess) The point is though, is that I still love ballroom dance. It is one of my most favorite pass times ever, and the only opportunity I have to dance with others and to learn more techniques is my school ballroom dance team (dance team is free, lessons in my area are like $100 an hour... no thanks) but I recently stopped showing up to dance practices because I feel like my teacher is being a little too demanding.

Don't get me wrong, my dance teacher is one of my favorite teachers ever, but I think she is just asking too much. I just want to dance for fun, that is my main goal with this. I don't really want to compete, or travel to competitions, or do anything really serious. But my teacher is insisting that I do competitions when I can't travel because of my parents not wanting me to. I explained to her the situation, but she still wants me to compete.

I understand that she is trying really hard to further the team and make us better, and I appreciate it, but I don't see why I have to compete. I originally started dancing because it was fun and I enjoyed it. But now it is turning into this thing that I feel like I am being forced into doing, and not to mention pay for. I might as well take lessons and pay for them, because competing is expensive. We have to pay for the bus there, to enter the competition, for our outfits, and all that stuff. I just can't afford it.

And I know people are going to say "Why don't you just keep on politely declining the offer to compete?" and it's because if you show up for practices, she assumes you want to compete, and she pairs up competition partners just randomly. So I don't want to get paired up and leave my partner without someone to dance with because I don't want to/ can't compete.

I feel bad because I feel like I am abandoning my team. But I just don't want to deal with feeling like this is something I am being forced into doing, I just want to dance for fun. I am not the only one who has left the team for these reasons either, we have a bunch of other people leave because they felt it was too much. Also, it is being taken so seriously that the practices have become boring, and a good friend of mine also left as well for this same reason.

And now that I don't show up to practices anymore, my teacher always asks me why I don't come to practice anymore whenever she sees me, and I tell her it was just too demanding and that I have been busy lately, and she still encourages me to come. I know she likes having me in the team because I guess I am one of the best follows in the team, and that is helpful for the new leads because it teaches them to lead, but like I said, I don't want to compete and be a serious ballroom dancer.

Idk guys, am I being unreasonable? My teacher is doing so much for the team, and I feel like I am being disrespectful. Also, what should I do? I miss ballroom dance like crazy, I miss dancing with other people and having that connection. I also feel bad for not being there for my team.

Aw I can understand the feeling. I love horseback riding but haven't been able to ride in months and I miss it so much. I personally don't think your over reacting. I think she should split the group up into those who actually want to compete and those who just want to dance for fun. My mom wanted to put my younger sisters into ballet but all the classes she could find were for getting ready to compete and she just wants my sisters to dance for fun.

when i hear 'team' i think of competing. baseball teams, basketball teams, cheer teams.. they all compete in one way or another. correct me if i'm wrong but it doesn't sound like it's a "dance for fun" class, but an extra curricular activity where yes, you're going to be competing against others.

it's totally understandable that you don't want to compete, but if that's the case try to find lessons being taught around town rather than joining a school team.

I really like your idea, splitting the team up. There is only one problem that could be in the way of that, is that my school is small, and so is the dance team. But I haven't been to a practice in forever, so for all I know there could be more members that have joined.

we used to be a club, where we just danced for fun and we only preformed at school fundraisers and such and it was only if we wanted to perform, but now its the team, and we are forced into competing if we show up. Also, I have looked into local lessons, and the cheapest in the area was $100 an hour, which is really expensive. I think I may go to this local west coast swing club (for all ages) and do that, but even then I am not learning as much as I wish, I guess it is better than nothing though.

Hm, I could see that being a problem. :( good luck though.