So this morning I found a jewelry box that had gotten packed away when I moved (like three times) that my now (more like over half a year ago) Ex had gotten me. Inside were some of my favorite pieces of jewelry (not all from him) including a set he had gotten me for my birthday the first year we were together. Ring, necklace and bracelet. Very nice garnet and silver pieces. So I figured why not, and wore them to work today. Sure enough a few people commented about how simple and very pretty they all were. Heck the ring even helped cut down how much I got hit on today, guess some guys don't know what hand means what haha.

It wasn't until one person asked where I got them and I explained that it started to feel a bit weird. They were like "....that's from your Ex and you still wear it?" with a 'how could you' kind of look. As if wearing it was a sin against whoever I may be dating now. Really, I hadn't of thought it was so bad. It's not like the jewelry ever did me any harm. Or anyone else for that matter. My Ex and I might not be on the best basis of communication right now but that shouldn't stop me from wearing it, right? No?

What do most people do with stuff they got from an Ex after they break up? Honestly I don't want to throw out everything he gave me just because we ended, nor would I expect him to toss anything I gave him. In fact a few months ago he fessed up to saying he still uses a writing and letter opener set that I got him for our 1 year anniversary. So Subeta, what's your take on all this?

If you like it and want to wear it, then it doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. If it bothers you that people get bothered when you say it's from an ex, just say "it was a gift". Most people will drop the issue then, but if someone presses you just shrug, or say it was a secret santa.

i personally think you have every right to wear whatever someone gave you. it may have had sentimental value in the past and it can still remind you of that person, but sometimes it's just a piece of clothing or jewelry. i have a necklace from my ex that i used to wear all the time. the chain broke a few days after we broke up, so i got a new one. then that one broke just a few days ago and i figured it was a sign that i wasn't to wear it anymore, so sometimes you aren't meant to wear that stuff, but if you found that jewelry box again, then i think it's a sign that you're meant to wear that jewelry. so it's really all up to you. and who cares what other people have to say anyway. :]

I think that should be a personal decision. It's one thing if I person doesn't want to keep or use something because it reminds them of the person and makes them upset... But if it's just jewelry to you and you still like wearing it (and if it's just a writing set to him and it's still of practical use) then there is no reason that you both shouldn't keep using those things. I would interpret it as people projecting their own emotions onto you, honestly. I would probably flat out remind them that it is your decision whether something feels wrong to you, not their decision -- especially when it's something as subjective and personal as whether to keep and use a gift.

It just depends on the person. Me for example, I refuse to wear any of the necklaces, earrings, and bracelet that my ex gave to me. It just feels wrong and it weirds me out. I still have a couple of necklaces that he gave me, but I dunno why because I never wear them. I got rid of some others though.

However, he also gave me a watch. I did continue to wear that for a long time after we broke up (and while dating my current bf) but it always bothered me. I wore it because I always want to know what time it is, but it is not always a good time to check your phone for it (such as during class or at work). Though that is my fault. I should've gotten a new watch sooner. I do have a new one now, so I retired the one that my ex gave me and I feel much better about it now.

Really, it just depends on your preference. If it doesn't bother you, then you can continue to wear it. And like others said, just say that you got it as a gift from a friend or your parents. I have a pair of earrings and necklace set given to me by my best guy friend that I sometimes wear.

I'll try to see if just saying it was a gift works, should the occassion arise again. It's just it slipped out of my mouth so fast, cause I'm a horrible liar.

Wow thats crazy that the chains kept breaking like that. I had a necklace like that, turned it into a keychain and it never broke off but instead I lost the whole keychain ring. But this one nothings ever gone bad. The chain is still incredibly well kept, was actually surprised at that. I really do love this set, it has got to be the nicest jewerly I've ever been given. I think thats part of why I still wear it too.

Never even thought to point that out. Honestly it hadn't of occured to me really that it could be more of a personal preference. I've never been the best with social standards of what dating and afterwards should be like, so I figured I was just doing something wrong again.

This is kinda the first boyfriend I had that when we had broken up he didn't take everything back that he had given me, so it was all new to me to still have all these things from when we were together. Heck, I've got hoodies of his still. I don't wear them because I live in Florida now but I think if I still lived up north I'd wear them in the winter. But I really cant say if it doesn't bother me to wear anything from him or that not wearing it and having something sit/be thrown out is just a huge waste of money and bothers me like nothing else. I'm a hugely practical person when it comes to things I keep and don't. Hopefully that makes sense.

I understand! It is just personal preference. My ex didn't ask for the items that he gave to me either. I just personally don't want to wear the jewelry that my ex gave me, but I would have no problem if someone wore/used the items that their exes gave them. It's your stuff, so you decide what to do with it. If you want to wear them, then put 'em to use!

Besides, not every relationship that ended becomes toxic. Some exes still remain friends. I might've been more willing to wear the stuff if I still talked to my ex civilly, but I haven't spoken to him in well over a year and a half and we don't follow each other on any social networking sites anymore lol.

Generally I prefer to let people do what makes them happy, I just forget I'm allowed that too lol. I get caught up in that stupid 'try to make everyone else happy' deal. Works well for the job I have though. But yeha, not all my relationships became toxic. One guy I dated for a while is now my biffle, one of my best friends ever. But all the toxic ones, they always wanted things back. Like they didn't want me to have any connection or piece of them at all. So I thought that was the norm. My current Ex, while we talk still I wouldn't really call it... civil? More like two warring nations emailing each other full of sass during a truce.

I think it's perfectly fine to wear those things if you feel comfortable wearing them. I personally didn't; I still had some jewellery that my ex had given me and even though it was pretty, I haven't worn any of it since we broke up because it made me think of him too much and really, I just hate the guy for the way he treated me. Just looking at those jewellery pieces made me uncomfortable, so I threw all of it out except for one ring. I got that one for my 18th birthday and it was really expensive, so I think I'll hold onto it. Maybe one day I can take it to a jeweller and re-use the diamonds to create something that's all mine.

But if the only thing that bothers you is how others react, I'd do what someone else also pointed out as well, just say it was a gift without mentioning from who.

Personally, I sold any of the silver pieces my ex got me, the rest was cheapo crap that gave me a rash anyways. With the current bf, he finally got me a necklace so I wear that all the time. It is not that I was like I hated the guy, it's just his pick of jewelry wasn't my taste but I felt obligated to wear it. What I like about the newest addition the necklace is that he let me go with him to pick it out, so it is actually something I really like and thus want to wear.

...this just showed up on the friend feed, heh xD -comes in-

Just echoing what other people have said, though. If you're completely over the end of your relationship, the jewelry in question doesn't bring you any "toxic" memories and it's something you find beautiful / enjoy wearing, then by all means keep it. It's silly to sell something solely for the reason you're not as close (or maybe even not in good terms) with the person anymore, if it doesn't make you feel bad.

If you asked me to define an ideal partner, I'd probably say "your best friend" at some point; if those were gifts from a friend you don't get along with anymore, it wouldn't make much sense to sell! Idk, it can be very painful at times but life's reality is that some things just don't work out. Of course this is my personal take, every case is different, but when people are decent towards each other, there are good chances breaking up won't bring such bitter feelings to warrant getting rid of every potential memory trigger.

To cut down on potential inquiries, on casual interactions I think I'd just go with "it was a gift from a friend", like other people said. If they asked further, I'd totally play it,

"ohh where did you buy this?" "it was a gift from a friend!" "omg really? I bet it was a close one, that must've been expensive!" "yeah! it was for my birthday, sadly we don't talk much anymore, but doesnt he have such lovely taste?" ...and then I could ask about their favorite stone or whatever because let's change the direction of that talk, lol.

If it was a close friend, since my close friends understand me and dont give me the stare, damn it do I hate the stares, I could say it's from the ex but I have no bitter feelings and I like it. xD I hate how people build these "social standards" that they expect to fit everything.

dude its free stuff i say just wear it lmao i still wear one of my exes shirts and jacked his metalocalypse boxset because he treated me like ass i deserve some kind of compensation for his douchebaggery

if youre uncomfortable with people getting rude at you for wearing stuff your ex got you, just tell them a family member got you them or something haha

If you are comfortable wearing it then I say just enjoy it. Truth is it couldnt have ALL been bad with the ex anyway, life is ups and downs. I admire you for being able to simply enjoy your pretty jewelry, no need to feel odd about it.

If other people have a problem well good for them thats fine. I wear rings given to me by an ex and jewelry given to my mother by my father and they divorced.

The alternative is to get rid of it or leave it in a drawer .. which seems such a shame when you actually love those things.

I personally don't have any issues with it, but I noticed that a lot of people do. I think people hurt or upset over an ex and don't want anything that reminds them of him/her. I still have most of the stuff from my past relationships, pictures and even a pair of boxers haha. I never felt a need to get rid of those things. After a break up, it kept me comfort, but when I got over it those things didn't really have any emotional connection anymore. Plus I like to have things to remember my past, my memory's quite bad. I don't feel sad about my past relationships, I don't often think about it, I don't mind talking about it and I certainly don't mind using items that remind me of it. It's really just that, a memory.

It doesn't seem to me to be something other people should or generally would judge you on; it has to do with how comfortable you personally are with it.

My ex gave me a ring that belonged to her mother. When we broke up, she asked for it back! :( It was probably expensive, but it meant a lot to me, and at the time we'd agreed to still stay best friends even if we weren't romantically involved. And I'd given her a lot of things that I didn't ask for or get back. Ha... Oh well. I wouldn't want to wear it now, since we don't talk any more and it would just bum me out.

I need to go through my things, but if I come across anything sentimental from her, I'm probably donating it. There wasn't anything other than that ring that I'd use often, though, so it's not as important to keep.

I tossed the necklace my ex gave me because it was something I wore all the time around her so the memories were really strong.

However I still have the stuffed animal she gave me sitting on my bed. I might get rid of it now that I'm dating someone else.

I guess it all depends on your point of view about it.

If I had stuff like that I would feel pretty uncomfortable and would toss everything away, even if I loved it Or I would donate it to random people

I don't see a problem with it, it was a gift. You can't just be expected to toss things just because they came from a person you're not as close to anymore. It's like having a best friend who gives you gifts and then you have a falling out but you still wear the cute things you got as gifts though you never speak again.

Though to some people I suppose they think that wearing it is inappropriate because they think you shouldn't be fine with having no emotional reaction to things that would remind you of a past relationship that went sour.

I'm always keeping presents from exes. Why not? Even if I haven't got along well with those guys - I'm going along really well with jewellery. There's a ring which my ex- gave me a long time ago - I love it very much and wearing it all the time.

If you like it and these gifts don't give you negative creeps - then you can keep it and wear it whenever you like. You don't need to pay so much attention to other people's opinions what is right and what is wrong.

However, I have one piece of jewellery that I never wear - it was given by the guy which adored me, but we never dated. And he gave me creeps. I still keep this bracelet, because I know he had good intentions giving it to me, I just didn't like him.

Everyone should make that decision for themselves, but I haven't kept anything. It's a part of closure to me.