I'm 20 years old, about to finish up my associates in psychology this fall, living with my boyfriend...and my parents.

I feel like my stepdad (technically my mom's fiance, but they've been together for over 10 years so he's fatherlike) is a total bully. I'm constantly walking on eggshells with him. I'm constantly receiving the blame for things I didn't do. Moreover, it's evident that he's chosen my younger sister as the favorite between the two of us.

Today he yelled at me (note: yelled) because I left a knife in the sink instead of putting it in the dishwasher. He continued to yell until I put the knife into the dishwasher. He and my mom left shortly thereafter to go out for drinks and I just fell at my wit's end. I texted my mom telling her everything about how I feel about him-- how he has blatantly picked favorites between my sister and I, how I'm always getting blamed, how he makes promises to my mom that he always breaks, and how I'm scared to talk about it because I know if he knew, he'll get offended and make me feel guilty for being upset. I haven't heard anything from her.

I want to move out, but I don't have the resources. I'd almost prefer to be homeless if it meant getting away from him.

I definitely need to start getting my "gather up all my precious internet friends and we can all live in one big, happy household away from financial stress/parental problems/general life crap" plan into action. You like bunk beds, right?

Its so hard to attempt to give you advice without more information. My 'stepfather' (Same sort of scenario with them being together for 5 years but not married) is a very loud childish goofy/aggressive at the drop of a dime kind of guy. This would drive me nuts his just playing with you attitude quickly would turn into something more malicious, with not much going through to him.

The way I look at it I think you probably should of talked to your mum rather than texting her. A text doesnt always show through what you want to convey. It might just be taken as you complaining or straight up 'getting between me and my man' sort of deal. I'd make time to go out with your mum have a 'date' or a time out with her away from him and your family and the house. Go get ice cream. Go sit in a cafe and people watch. Go grab a hot dog and sit in the park. Some where your both comfortable. And have a talk with her about how you feel. Ask the generic, is there something I have done? What can I try to do? Would she be willing to for you all to have a sit down and chat? Go into it open and willing to listen. She may have something to say that will give you insight. Let her know its really causing you stress and anxiety and your feelings but not in a condescending way. Ask her how she is feeling, how she sees the relationship between your sister and your stepdad, you and your stepdad etc. Ask for her to try to do this from a third person looking in.

Now in your scenario your mum may not be this kind of person. You'll know if this will work or not.

How does your sister feel in this scenario? Would a family meeting be best? You dont want this to end up an us versus them meeting however again you'll know if this will work with your family or not.

You can always try and sit down and talk with your stepfather (This would definitely make you the bigger person). And ask simple questions in the sense of if theres anything that needs doing that week in the house, if the answer is reasonable try to do it that week. Show you can listen and interact with him peacefully.

When he starts yelling just quietly let him know that you feel uncomfortable, that you'll correct the ("small insignificant") thing such as a knife in the wrong place and then change the subject. Such as would you like a cup of tea. How was so and so's sport game. Chin up girl, communication is not fun but make sure your head is screwed on and not let him shake you down. Your 20. He should not be yelling at you about a knife. There is probably something else going on in his life thats making him feel the need to lash out. Interestingly, does he do this infront of your mother?

Have you let your boyfriend know how you feel? He might be able to see things from both sides. Its always good to have a sounding board.

Has your stepfather been like this for the 10 years? Or has this developed in recent years. I know in my household (Im 21) it started to get a bit more tense with me remaining at home so I made an active effort to pitch in more around the house, taking more responsibility in cooking cleaning etc.

For your own peace of mind it sounds like you need to start developing some good coping strategies. Mine was to get out and go for runs (Yes I am a freak) or go and sit in my local library with my music (headphones) and a magazine or book of my choice for a couple of hours. When presented with a scenario I found threatening I would remove myself quietly, let it be known with body language that I was not enjoying the scenario, and be minimally involved in an escalation. Learning some good de-escalation techniques may also be of some benefit for you. Find some you space. Write yourself poems, find some really strong quotes that resound for you and hold them dear. Write a story around the way your feeling, paint yourself this story. What ever your kicks are. Hold in there, build your pillow fort and hang your little flag with pride as you gather your resources.