of fighting with depression, I finally got the courage to tell someone about it last night. My mom, to be specific. And she said she's gonna try to find me a free/affordable counselor. She was super supportive, but I'm worried about what my dad will say. He's kind of an asshole. Also the main reason I've been like this so long. Truthfully, it's probably been more than six years, but that's as far as I can remember clearly.

Anyway I don't even know what the point of this is. I guess I just want to get it off my chest. I haven't been myself lately. I haven't had a good night's sleep in years and I'm exhausted. I've been an ass to a few people on here too, so I want to apologize if you're one of them. But yeah. Here's hoping I finally find some peace with myself I guess.

Talking to a counselor isn't easy, but he/she will help you to understand what's going on in your head and in your life and help you through whatever it is you are going though. I wish you luck and I hope everything works out for you in the end. ♥

Congratulations on working up the courage to talk about it! That's a great first step and I hope your mom can find someone suitable quickly.

I'm sorry about your dad. The best that you can do is focus on your mother's support. Depression and other illnesses like it do tend to run in families, so its possible your dad's miserableness is due to his own mental health issues. While this doesn't excuse his being an asshole, it might help you to understand what's happening and to realize its not a lack in you.

woo! it's definitely the first step to a better you... as corny as that sounds rofl

It's great you did this step. It's absolutely a step in the right direction. As for your dad, however he will react, most important is that you do what is good for you. Even if his reaction woun't be the one you wish for.

I give you props for telling your mom and this new step in your life, really. After your dad gets informed, I think that it can only get better from there c:

I don't know you, but I just want to say congratulations for being able to do that. It takes a lot of courage to be able to tell somebody that you need help and I'm glad you're getting the help that you need. c:

Thank you everyone. c: I've been trying to convince myself to say something for a long time now, and it already feels better. I really appreciate the support from you guys, even if you don't know me personally.

With my dad, I guess I'm mostly afraid he'll say I'm just having a bad day or dismiss it some other way, like he did when I used to have panic attacks. And my family does have a history of mental disorders, so that's probably another contributor to his behavior. But I know he cares about me, so I'm hoping he'll be supportive this time. I'm 21 now so he can't exactly say it's some teenage stage or something.