I was at the grocery store today with my friend and this older lady was in front of us going through her change purse and she couldn't find it or count it and she was having a hard time. So I got my change out and gave the cashier what the lady needed and with the lady's reaction, you'd think no one had ever shown her any kindness in her life. It wasn't that much money at all. But by the way she acted, you'd think I gave her a million dollars, lol. It made my day, it made my friend's day, and it definitely made the lady's day. All for some measly change.

But it got me to thinking...is kindness really that rare that people freak out when you give them a little change or a hug or whatever? The thought makes me sad that we live in a culture that doesn't seem to care much anymore. Only Misha Collins and his Random Acts gives me hope some days.

So I'd like to hear what the people of Subeta do to be kind...online or offline...what have you done lately to be kind to others?

What do you think about the state of kindness in this world we live in?

I don't really think that people are less kind. I think it's more like we live in such a fast time, that people more and more concentrate on themselves. It's a culture of egoism.

I work as a nurse so I have an open eye for people (especially old) in trouble or in need of help. In a fast time like ours it's hard to keep up when your mind and body get slower and slower.

From my personal experience not all but a lot of people only show kindness if they feel it gives them an advantage.

I don't think kindness is rare at all, I just think that we might not notice it all the time. Also, at least around here a lot of people rarely carry change anymore so even if we see someone who needs it we can't do much about it. It's also common around here at least for people to express gratitude profusely, even over minor things.

People are always rushing and we're not always aware of what's going on around us. I don't think it's "egoism" (that's usually used to mean someone who's excessively focused on themselves), I just think that there's so much to worry about that people genuinely don't notice what's going on around them. All too often a few people will notice something going on and others will say, "What's happening?" or later find out something happened and say they didn't even notice. I think it's just a result of how busy everyone's lives are, not that the person is less kind or egotistical.

I don't think kindness is rare. I think anger and rudeness are rampant on the internet, but out in the real world luckily people are much kinder. It's really easy to forget that and get down about it though :(

Last week a woman at the grocery store stopped me just to tell me my hair looked beautiful, I was kinda blown away :D

I dunno, I'd rather see someone respond like she did to an act of kindness than, say, blow it off like it isn't a big deal (or, even worse, like it's expected of people).

You didn't have to do anything, but you did - and she made it clear that your generosity didn't go unnoticed. She wanted you to know that, even though it wasn't that big of a deal to you, it made a difference to her and she was grateful for it. Seeing how happy you made her means you'll likely do some small kindness to another again in the future, rather than think "It doesn't seem to matter if I'm nice to anyone or not. Next time I'll just keep the dang change since they don't seem to care one way or another." Positive reinforcement, blah blah blah.

Just my two cents, anyways.

I think that we are growing more into a society of individualism. People are more and more concern about themselves, forgetting people around.

On Friday, I had to get some blood tests done. We need to be up early and in line (it's first come, first serve). There is an old lady with a cane, barely able to walk. I was standing since 6:05 am and she came maybe 15 minutes later. There was a small bench and someone left so I asked the lady if she wanted to sit (she was sitting on the ground, too tired by now). She was really grateful.

If I hadn't mentionned it, no one would have said anything. The fact that I was the youngest (bunches of oldies people) surprise me. We always hear that the youngsters are impolite and horrible, seems to me that it's mixing everyone in the same bag.

It's not that people are becoming meaner. It's that they're distracted. I notice people are always on their phones. Because of this, most people don't notice what's going on around them. If people would get off their technology and take time to interact in the real world, there would be many more acts of kindness.

When there's multiple people around, no one will act, because they think someone else will act.

I like to smile and say hi to people. If someone needs to sit, I let them sit. I hold open doors for people. I talk to people if they feel lonely and want to talk. I also volunteer at various places. The only thing I'm cautious of is if someone is trying to take advantage of me. If I feel like they are, I back off and don't help them anymore.

On the same vein of kindness, where the hell did all the manners go?

I'm shocked daily when people don't say please or thank you. It just.. why? They aren't long words. Hell, Thank you can be shortened to "Thanks" just why can't you take 1 second out of your conversation to thank someone for doing something nice for you.

I suppose. Probably comes down to living in an increasing individualistic culture and maybe it comes down to the situation nowadays, in which altruism doesn't tend to 'pay off' so much. Simply due to things like people moving around more, increasing population and density, having less connection biologically and culturally to those around you, etc. Same reasons people seem ruder in large cities.

I don't go out of my way to be kind, but I end up being moderately kind simply by being polite and wanting to avoid any conflict.

I completely agree!

I just..don't even know. I just moved to California and I'm working with the most unfriendly, rude, racist, terrible people. And none of them even feel bad about it, they think being mean makes them cool. It's like a bad high school movie.

Too right you are.

I always find ways to be kind, If I see stuff off a display, I put it back, I help little old ladies get products from the shelves if they cant reach, I help people with homework and studying. I put carts away, and if I find litter if its not too disgusting I throw it away. I put up my neighbors trash bins,if they fall over I tilt them back upright and fill them back up with any garbage that fell out. How hard it it go be nice? How hard is it to do what you know is right? I mean just today I threw away a plastic 72 oz soda that someone left on a generator near my college. Its been there for a few days.

Woops double post

I think kindness is gone. For whatever reason, people pay less attention to others, always and all the time.

We are to selfish or too worry about ourselves that we forget to look at others around us.

I've been helping a friend out. She's a poor college kid who's been having to chose between paying for her college or eating dinner. Thank God for PayPal is all I'll say.

It's odd bits of money, I try to keep it constant but it's keeping her from wondering if she's eating that night. I wish, if anything, that I could give her more.

And, unfortunately, that somehow makes me very odd.

I don't think it is. It's true that there are a lot of people in the world who will do things that aren't very kind, and it's very easy to let these select few sway your opinion of the majority. People tend to remember the negatives more so than the positives-so I think just that natural fixation on the negative is why people think the world is generally unkind. most people make some sort of an effort to be kind, and some succeed more than others. It's very rare to find someone who is completely unconcerned for others. People also show kindness in different ways, so what they think qualifies as kindness, might not be the same as your idea of it. I definitely don't think that being self-centered is a recent trend and I definitely don't think technology has anything to do with it.

I think kindness requires effort and that's too much for most people. I mean true kindness puts yourself at a disadvantage (you technically lost the "change" for example), be it monetary, time, etc. so most people say fuck it.

I remember waiting for a doc appointment with a woman who said she's going to wind up late picking up her daughter from school, so I told her she could have my earlier appointment, and she was extremely grateful for it.

Recently, there was a looooong line at a bakery where everyone was buying a lot of cakes and the girl in front of me wanted one donut. That's it. She must have waited 15+ minutes in line when any one of those people could have said it's okay you can go in front of me since you got the change prepared. But no one did anything. People, for the most part, suck. If they don't know you, they have zero reason to be considerate to you, and even if they know you, it's hard to come by kindness, but maybe I just got the shit end of the stick. My friend thinks the world of everyone, because she's optimistic and people have consistently been nice to her. It depends on what and who is around you.