well.. long story short: there's this kid that likes me, and i kind of like him. he says the only reason that he won't ask me out is because of the 'guy code'. because i went out with one of his friends, and we broke up. so he won't date me because i'm his friends ex.

i don't get the point of this. if you like the person.. you shouldn't think that a stupid code is holding you back... i just think that is totally stupid...

any other thoughts? :

i don't know about a ''guy code''... but if this guy values his friendship over potential date material, why find that upsetting?

i'm not necessarily convinced that this is the true reason he refrains from asking you out, however.

@ DocHoliday

Honestly if I were him I wouldn't touch you with an 80 foot pole unless I got some deep and serious confirmation that the guy you had dated wouldn't raise hell at some point. And even then it's just iffy. I think it's less of a 'guy code' or 'girl code' (in the case of chicks) than it is a general respect for your friends. You have to tread a little lighter, jealousy and anger can flair up unexpectedly. That's drama I don't want, and I'm sure few people want.

how close is he with your ex? and .-. wouldn't you be sort of annoyed if a friend of yours started dating someone you dated?

I think it depends on whether he is really close with his friend... kinda comes down to, would you rather be with a dude that you hang around with, or get involved in a relationship.

He needs to tell his friend that he is going to be dating you though, otherwise he would be a jerk.

But it kinda sounds like he is using his friend as an excuse... maybe he isn't ready for a relationship yet. :/

tbh, i find it polite not to date a friend's ex. a guy basically went through my group of friends, just one girl after another, and it caused some nasty fights

maybe he just doesn't like you as much as you think he does?

they're best friends. and that's very true. i guess that would be kind of... hurtful.

no, no. it's not that. i just.. find it upsetting. but how like Asoka said, I would be upset if my friend dated my ex... so i guess i understand it now.

The 'Guy Code' ? Come on now.. that's a little dumb to say as a reason for not going out with you. I think its cool that he's thinking about his friend, but if he really likes you then he should ask you out.

What a stupid thing."Guy code" is a really idiot thing. So,why don't you ask him to go out?

i already know that he'll say no because of it. everytime i'll bring up that he likes me, he'll say: "I don't wanna talk about it. You're his ex."

I've heard of it. Had a crush on a guy back in high school and I just thought he didn't like me back. Eventually I got over it and moved on. Of corse he took that time to tell me he'd like me all along but never acted on it because his best friend had had this HUGE crush on me.

I'm sure to some guys its a legit reason. And to others it's a bs reason they pull out their bum to get out of dating you. shrug you never know. But still, I'd respect his wishes. And his friendship.

You are his ex,but not he.If he really wanna be with you,he don't will give any explanations. Well,this is what I think.I can't read a guy's mind and know what he think,so,make your own way.

i mean, if you really like the guy, it might be worth it to sit down with both him and your ex or something? x: cause if your ex really doesn't mind and you are certain that you clear it with him, then the guy might not mind. but if you don't even really like him that much, lol :c it might be more trouble than it's worth but yeah, you just gotta try to put it in perspective, especially if they're best friends.

well, i just texted my friend, [who's my ex.] and he just said that he really likes me... do you think that's why the other guy won't date me? because he knows that my ex still has feelings for me? i'm just really curious, and want your opinion.

Dude, I call bullshit. If this guy really wanted to go out with you, he would just do it, regardless of some 'guy code'. Im sorry, but he's just not worth your time and you shouldn't waste it anymore on him. I can get if he was going to be a little cautious around you because of you having dated his friend, but unless it was his best friend since kindergarten or something, then it wouldn't matter to him.

i think i should forget about it.. i mean, he's cool and all.. and i do like him. but i don't like him like i use to like my ex. i think i should just let it blow over? if it ever does.

to call it the 'guy code' is perhaps the most ridiculous part of it He is trying to avoid creating a social awkwardness by having the relationship with someone who was once in a relationship with his friend.

I think given some time and perhaps having the situation brought up to the ex in question (though who should do it I don't know, and even if it's a good idea I don't know. these things are situational) it can have a chance. It just needs the time for the awkwardness to not be a factor.

i would say that's probably it ]: and if they're best friends, he probably knows so i think it's safe to say that's why. it might be best to just sort of hope that it blows over. i think that pushing it with the guy will just put a tension on his friendship and it'll probably just make him more hesitant about dating you anyway.

Yeah, I would forget him. If you still want to talk to him and stuff or whatever, thats fine, but I wouldnt talk about anything too personal with him. Thats just my take on it, do whatever you think is right, ok?

alright, thanks. but yeah.. guys are confusing in general. well.. that's my opinion x]