Welp. Im now in a relationship with the guy I wanted to be with four years ago. I was in a three year long semi-abusive relationship that I could not leave until I moved to Vancouver. (my ex was a champion manipulator, it was so hard to see until I moved away and took a look back at things :C)

And advice for long distancing it? Myself and this guy have always been able to talk for upwards of two-three hours at ANY point in our friendship and still have that prowess... and we've both cared a lot about each other the past 4 years (likely more then one should for "just friends" relationships... But I digress) but I would like to know if there are any things that would make the distance less difficult? We're both rather, in person people, so it stings a little bit to have to wait till days when the other is in town.

(disney as fuckness remaining undetailed unless requested, its a lot.)

- I'm glad you were able to get away from the abusive relationship! It took you a lot of strength to walk away from your ex.

How large is the distance between you and your boyfriend? Is it possible for him to move to Vancouver?

I understand how painful it can be to have to wait so long to see your boyfriend. Mine is currently out of the country for the summer. I really miss him. Something that eases the pain is I remind myself he's enjoying time with his family, which is something he's been looking forward to. I also hang out with friends and talk to people at school. When I'm alone, I watch videos and read. The key is to remain positive.

12 hour drive, 1 hour flight. One province away. It might be plausible for him to move, as he has not started engineering yet but with the shitstorm that is BCU I would rather he did his edumacation in Alberta.

And yes, I am capable of remaining positive. I think I am the luckier one in this situation, I've got a cat to keep me company and my college school friends. He's just got his friends from highschool.

Long-distance couples need to do the same thing as normal couples, they just need to adapt them! Have date nights over Skype. Watch the same movie at the same time and keep the phone on the entire time so you can tell each other what you think. Start a new TV series together and watch them on the same night, don't ever watch it before the other, so it's like you two are living together and sharing your screens. Cook the same foods every few nights so you feel like you're really together. The closer to normal you can get, the less it will feel like a long-distance thing. Make sure to communicate every day too, and tell each other all about your days. If you make it feel like he's just across town, psychologically you might not miss him as much. But also be sure to actually see each other as much as possible, nothing beats a hug from someone you love.

manipulating in what ways? if you dont mind me asking

I don't mind but, its rather difficult to explain. A good example would be, I would be discussing my issues about something, and he would make it about him, and then make me feel guilty for even thinking my problem was worth complaining about. He would also make me feel horrible for having male friends. So he managed to slowly yank my support group out from under me. Not to mention directly commenting on my looks with, I would prefer this or that, whenever i was feeling really confident. to drag me back down to the easy to manipulate level.

I was younger so i wasnt as solid in myself as I am now, so i learned my lesson.

I'm in a ldr right now too! It's lame. :c But we care so much about each other there's just no other option but to stick it out until we can close the distance. For me a few things make the distance easier to handle:

-Sleeping on the phone :P some people do this on Skype. Hanging up the phone is the worst feeling, so saying goodnight and being able to hear my babe still, helps a lot.

-Also if we are both just around the house doing boring stuff like cleaning, chores, schoolwork for me, we stay on the phone and just chat with long periods of silence while we get stuff done. It's kinda like being around each other in a really casual way, which is otherwise impossible from a distance.

-Mail things, even just letters, useless little things if you're the type to give gifts, maybe take photos of yourself and actually get them printed, anything, because mail lets your relationship be physical even when you're far apart. Find a cool rock on a hike? Mail it! Win a little toy in one of those crane machines? Mail it! It doesn't have to be a Huge Important Gift, make it a casual surprise, 'cause like I said above, being casual long distance is so so hard

Hope that helps a lil