Quest Shop: Pride Sashes

June 27, 2018, 1:29 am by

I’m really sorry if I offended anyone, and I can understand now why the hetero flag wasn’t included. I don’t think anyone should ever feel persecuted or judged and certainly not hurt because of their sexuality or gender. This is a wonderful community, and I have a lot of love and respect for you all.

June 27, 2018, 12:59 am by

Hetero discrimination being ok nowadays? How the hell is Pride hetero discrimination lmao? People celebrating their perseverance and history in the LGBT+ community during a single month out of the year is not discrimination at the poor heteros, man :////

June 27, 2018, 12:46 am by

Having stuff just for the marginalized crowds isn't "discrimination" against everyone else. Apparently when the LGBTQA+ groups get their own things, they have to share those things with the majority... the majority that they made their community to shelter from? Uh. Okay.

Being bisexual doesn't give you a pass to be ignorant.

June 27, 2018, 12:30 am by

And before anyone jumps all over me... I am Bi.

June 27, 2018, 12:28 am by

Awesome timing! ❤ I'm transgender (FTM) and just had phalloplasty surgery in Austin, TX. Definitely doing some personal celebrating. :D

June 27, 2018, 12:28 am by

Sigh. Feels like hetero discrimination... but that is OK nowadays.

June 27, 2018, 12:03 am by

Thank you for these, Subeta! Gonna save up my quest points for the ones I need >D

Also, to everyone trying to come in here and stick their noses into this, with "but labels!" this and "where's the cishet pride?? uwu" that: Do not do this. Part of the reason us old timers left Other Virtual Pet Sites to come to Subeta was specifically BECAUSE Keith created an intersectional game where we could freely express our identities without the risk of being banned because of awful and bigoted notions regarding people who are non-cis, are non-het, and/or are non-Christian. I don't know if some of you younger players seem to understand what an incredibly important thing Subeta was (and tbh still is) back in the day, where even mentioning in passing that you were dating someone of the same sex could get you permanently banned from other websites and other games. Subeta was a place where we could associate safely with other kids and teens our age that were ALSO LGBTQIA, who were ALSO non-Christian, etc etc etc, while still engaging in a game.

Half of the beauty of Subeta is the intersectionality of the userbase, and the site's acceptance of who we are as people. The very fact that my avatar can wear a bi pride sash and a pentacle while carrying a cane, representing me as a person in real life without punishing me for that, is a testament to the innovative way the staff and Keith created this game and this site. This is not the place for "discourse" about labels. (PROTIP: Labels are part of who we are and you don't get to police that! Hope that helps.) This is not the place to ask "WHY NOT STRAIGHT PRIDE?!" (PROTIP: It's because every single day of our lives is straight pride, from media to books to education at all levels, hope that helps) This is the place for people who stand by others and respect who we all are, for all our intricacies and identities.

June 27, 2018, 12:01 am by

'Everyone should be treated the same.' 'It's no ones business but your own' You can't ignore peoples differences. Different people need different accommodations. You mentioned people should be treated the same regardless of ability. Hopefully wouldn't expect someone who cannot use their legs to climb stairs just because other people can. Pretending we are all the same and all capable of the same things is harmful in more ways than one. It is also inappropriate to act like LGBT people should keep their identities to themselves, it is already hard enough to find people like you, to find resources, to figure out that you are not weird or broken. I can't imagine how painful it would be to never tell anyone.

We shouldn't have to suffer in silence as if our sexuality or gender is a prison or a punishment. If cishet people are allowed to be out and proud, expected to be, it's cruel to act like the rest of us don't need labels, that it's no ones business but our own. Especially when other people make it their business in order to harass us. When I came out to a friend as a 12 year old word spread like wildfire and I was told by other children that all gay people should be lined up and shot. I played coming out off as a joke and it took me nearly ten years to feel comfortable telling a few people I was gay after that. We need our community, people like us, the people we so rarely get to see when we are growing up realizing we are LGBT. Ee need that support network to make sure we survive in this cruel world.

Sorry if this is blunt. It's 5am and I am very tired. I just believe there is something just dangerous in pretending we are the same, the only people who will benefit from that are the people who do not need accommodations to live a healthy life. It's detrimental to everyone else

June 26, 2018, 11:50 pm by

And by hetero people, I should have also added cis.

June 26, 2018, 11:49 pm by

(forgot to post this on my previous comment but i'm so happy that these exist, thank you subeta and !! ) ❤️

June 26, 2018, 11:47 pm by

Even it is excluding heteros and cis (I don't believe that because the party isn't specifically for you that you are being excluded), LGBT+ people have been excluded from a lot more for a lot longer. Surely, us hetero people should be able to sit back and just let LGBT+ people be happy about themselves, even if that means we don't get a pixel sash.

June 26, 2018, 11:45 pm by

To say that the existence of labels of any kind is null and pointless is... a little insensitive. I can't speak for everyone, but as a lesbian, the label is incredibly important to me, because I do not want to be lumped in with the same people who have harassed and systematically oppressed us. In an ideal world, there wouldn't be any discrimination against anyone, but that's not the case. Even if saying "I don't see your XYZ" might come from a good place where you simply wish to see everyone equal, it still inherently erasing the struggles of those people who are finally getting their time to be proud of who they are.

(Also there's some unfortunate connotations with phrases like "it's no one's business but your own!" because being publicly lgbt has been and still is illegal in some places and we've been pushed into the closet for centuries. )

June 26, 2018, 11:44 pm by

A little random, but despite all the controversy here, I'm really happy to see this many comments in the news section. I've read every comment that's popped up, and I keep coming back to read for a couple of reasons. For one, I never knew how big of an LGBTQ community subeta has. Admittedly I'm not super active, but I think that's part of pride right, making people aware that you're here and that you exist? As someone who is quietly and happily LGBTQ it makes me really happy to see everyone! Secondly, I think pride brings awareness, and I think there's a lot of people participating in civil discussion and educating people on either side. Not just on history and terminology, but about where people are in their opinions and understandings. I always love to learn more, and I admit some lack of knowledge about different identities and sexualities, so this all is enlightening. Back on topic: the sashes are beautiful and well done! I appreciate the effort and intentions behind them!

June 26, 2018, 11:33 pm by

Sadly, that's not how the world works. Many people don't believe that, and will treat others differently based on those things-- whether it's treating them cruelly or hiding them or acting like they don't exist. It's illegal/criminalized in some countries to be gay, even. And since the LGBT diaspora /is/ treated differently for the way they simply, naturally are, then of course we're going to take our labels and make the world see that yes, we do exist, we are proud of who we are, there is no reason for us to be mistreated or hated or censored for just existing.

So damn right we're going to make it everyone's business, because a lot of the time, that "everyone" likes to pretend that we don't exist, or shouldn't exist, or should be swept under the rug! It would be cool if all of us could be treated the same, but that's simply not the case, and in response to that reality, things like pride and bold labels come about.

June 26, 2018, 11:30 pm by

Labels are incredibly important for helping people define themselves, understand themselves, and describe themselves. They help people find communities of others who have similar experiences they can share, learn from, get advice from etc. There are plenty of reasons to use them.

June 26, 2018, 11:15 pm by

how rude! youve left out the sapiosexual pride flag, the most beautiful one of all!

(thats a joke in case its not clear. im a huge dyke lmao.)

June 26, 2018, 11:08 pm by

I think you misunderstood my meaning. I don't see any reason at for people to label themselves. Everyone should be treated the same. Your sexuality, gender, race, abilities or religion shouldn't have anything to do with it. It's no ones business but your own.

June 26, 2018, 11:02 pm by

June 26, 2018, 10:48 pm by

LOL well thats the feeling i was looking for, but definition-wise i meant more like... specifically the variation of different kinds of people? OH!! DIVERSE!! DIVERSITY!! thats the one lol, i hate forgetting words xpp thx tho XD

June 26, 2018, 10:42 pm by

jesus fucking christ this is a trainwreck, can y'all just mutually chill the fuck out

straight people don't need pride sashes, the gay pride sash can be worn if you're straight and want to show acceptance, and we don't need to start the "no cishets" thing because you're deliberately throwing fuel on a bonfire and this is about pixel sashes

THEY'RE PIXEL SASHES, GUYS

June 26, 2018, 10:21 pm by

Pride is absolutely not about "love, no matter the source".

Pride was made specifically with LGBT people in mind. It's LITERALLY a branch off of the Stonewall Riots. The first Pride parades were to celebrate and remind people of the Stonewall Riots and were protests, not parties.

Everyone is welcome to participate, but it's not ABOUT everyone. It is an event very specifically celebrating LGBT people. Just because my heterosexual friend came with me to celebrate pride with me and his bisexual gf doesn't mean it was an event for him. It was an event for me and his girlfriend, and he came to support and celebrate us.

June 26, 2018, 10:06 pm by

-checks the comments since my last one- Oof. See, this is why I suggested some general solid color sashes (in addition to these pride sashes, not as a replacement) for everyone to wear regardless of their gender or sexuality rather than suggesting cis/het pride sashes. I don't need to wear clothes that tell people I'm cishet because we make up the majority and thus people just assume that's what I am anyway, and wearing something like that might make people associate me with anti-LGBT movements that I don't want to associate with. I would like some pretty sashes to wear and I don't want to step on anyone's toes by wearing their flag as nothing more than a fashion accessory, but I'd rather not have any sashes for myself than ask for something like that. I'd also like to say that I think everyone should look at the post wrote here in the comments. It basically boils down to "educate people, but don't assume anyone's trying to be malicious" only longer and better, and I think it's the best message here.

June 26, 2018, 9:59 pm by

NO CISHETS ALLOWED IN MY TOWN

June 26, 2018, 9:56 pm by

I probably won't be using any of these myself, but it's nice to see something for Pride Month here! And they're lovely wearables to boot, too. 😊

- Pride as in the actual feeling of pride, sure. But pride as in pride events is specifically an occasion for people belonging to gender- or sexual orientation minorities to celebrate who they are, because they often genuinely aren't able to due to the discrimination they still face. It's not that straight people are being excluded due to how some of them act - it's because it's intended as a celebration of something that simply doesn't apply to them. A straight person is able to celebrate their identity just about any time without facing backlash for it because being straight and cis is still considered the standard in most places; the same luxury doesn't exist for the groups pride events are intended for, as in many places being open about your non-straight/cis identity still makes you a target for discrimination ranging from verbal- or physical abuse to attempts at "correcting" your identity, or potentially even worse.

If people want to partake in the celebrations even though they're straight and cis, they can still be supportive as an ally, though! In the case of these sashes, you can use the general, rainbow Pride Sash as mentioned for that - it might not be specifically for heterosexual pride, but that option's still there for those who want to celebrate despite not being among the people pride events are supposed to be for. 😊

June 26, 2018, 9:36 pm by

Right, why is why I also said that they're welcome to come and celebrate with everyone else for their loved ones, those who can't come out, those who have passed due to mistreatment. Stop reaching.

June 26, 2018, 9:35 pm by

Pride is about love, no matter the source. And people like you are exactly the reason infighting takes over the purpose of Pride.

June 26, 2018, 9:34 pm by

And you're saying all het people do this and thus shouldn't be allowed to celebrate. Nice.

You're just as vile as the hets that excluded and berated you to begin with. Can't you see the hypocrisy? You're excluding hets that are completely innocent and blaming the sins of a few on the many. Just as bad. Pride, in reality, should be about everyone coming together. Not a different exclusionary group versus the other.

June 26, 2018, 9:29 pm by

Just popping back in to say I've posted some free to use LGBT pride heart pixels in the forums if anyone is interested ;w;

June 26, 2018, 9:26 pm by

Aldo, forreal, don't start this "so much for the tolerant and accepting gays" shit, I don't have to or want to pretend that I like the people who have yelled death threats to my face, told me that they would assault me until I realise I'm "just a really big tomboy nor does any other LGBT+ person who's been treated like crap by these people.

June 26, 2018, 9:22 pm by

Yet again, celebrating your identity that het and cis people have been trying to destroy for literal centuries, yet remaining, and thriving, is what Pride is about. It is not "exclusionary" to not include people who have tried to stomp you out. It is not hypocritical to point out that hetero people really have no reason to have a pride flag because they don't face mistreatment that LGBT+ people do. They don't have the history of marganized identities. They are the reason why Pride IS a thing. They are the reason why it is still important for us to show why we are proud of who we are. Ignoring that and asking why there is "exclusion" towards them is completely missing the point.

They have 11 months where they don't even think about "wow I wish I had pride and shit like that" it always, ALWAYS comes up as but what about me crying during Pride month, which just oozes in this thread too. I've never, ever heard of demand for het inclusion in Pride or even for a flag outside of Pride month. Which really shows how much it's actually important to them aside from "why am I not a part of everything???"

Not only that but cis and hetero allies have always been welcome at Pride to celebrate for those who can't, who aren't out, and to show support for their loved ones. You don't need to come in with "what about me" and try to butt in to be included in a community that is together precisely from the years of mistreatment.

June 26, 2018, 9:10 pm by

If someone is saying they're hetero but questioning that they might actually be ace, i would suspect they might be heteromatic asexual. So i'd advise anyone who feels this way to look into that. Also, there actually is a hetero flag, as well as others not represented here. This is because this is pride month, for acknowledging everyone else. Het people don't need to be included in pride month because heterosexuality is seen as the default; no one ever shamed you for being straight. Also ditto what others have said here, this is about sexual orientation so fetishes/kinks are not specified, nor races/ethnicities, because if we attempted to make pride about every aspect of identity it would get impossibly convoluted, plus those things are just more specific subgroups of the broader categories represented here. Also THANK YOU subeta team for including the ace flag. It's usually ignored, or just dismissed as being either nonexistent or the result of a psychological or medical problem, and i have been disappointed to see ace people mocked by other participants at pride parades. So this is lovely.

June 26, 2018, 9:08 pm by

whoops. Wish I could edit comments, lol.

June 26, 2018, 9:07 pm by

I love that there's an ace sash and a non binary, thank you so much Quentin!

June 26, 2018, 9:07 pm by

Because there is no reason to be exclusionary at all. Het/straight people might be the "norm", but if what we're practicing is equality for all these is zero reason to exclude them from Pride. I might have my flag, but you'll see countless others arguing against it even so. Highly hypocritical, for the people who are supposedly "accepting". I mentioned my asexuality because I know specifically some people are against us being included, so I empathize for the straight people who are facing the same problem (even if they are the norm).

June 26, 2018, 9:00 pm by

hum, I wouldn't say so? I've known a great many bi women (including all but one of my partners) but haven't noticed them being any more likely to peg me as LGBT. They tend to be more preoccupied with men anyway.

June 26, 2018, 8:56 pm by

, I'd be down for BDSM pride, as well!

SPOILER (click to toggle)

https://ih1.redbubble.net/image.338716069.5236/ap,550x550,16x12,1,transparent,t.u1.png

I'd be down for BDSM pride, as well!

Design by porcupride on RedBubble.

June 26, 2018, 8:39 pm by

YESSS! Now I can adequately show my sexuality! (Yes, I do also have rainbow stuff on, butttt I'M PAN AND PROUD)

June 26, 2018, 7:49 pm by

love is love <3

June 26, 2018, 7:39 pm by

Omggg I was literally looking all over for some kind of Pride items for this month; figured they already existed, maybe even as CWs... BUT NOW THEY ARE HERE AND I CAN BE ASEXUAL WITHOUT SHAME!

June 26, 2018, 7:27 pm by

!! Cue excited screeching! Yay! Thank you~!

June 26, 2018, 7:07 pm by

but those bi/pan ladies youre talking about are probably a lot more likely to at least suspect you're into ladies too though, right? i know tons of feminine bi girls :)

June 26, 2018, 7:03 pm by

Good points! I just really frankly hate the lesbian flag, though I really do like the alternative you linked. As-is, it feels exclusionary and not like representation at all, really, more like more expectations of femininity that I will inevitably fail to meet. I think I'll stick with the rainbow flag if the lesbian flag is always gonna be....like that. (Which sort of defeats the point of a lesbian-specific flag in the first place.)

June 26, 2018, 6:57 pm by

Another butch here, the edited lipstick lesbian flag has been in use as the lesbian flag for a few years now, and I understand it not feeling like a good representation of all lesbians. Our experiences are all so varied, and that flag was designed specifically with femmes in mind, it would be nice to have one with more complex meaning behind it. However, we went so long without a public lesbian flag so while I don't like to settle, it's nice to be included.

There are issues with the labyrs flag too for the record, mainly that the labyrs has fascist roots and the black triangle is misattributed from the holocaust, it was used on 'asocial' women. People are trying to make a new one that everyone will like, but I unfortunately do not think it's going to amount to much. this is the most popular one thus far but with the lipstick lesbian variant only just being recognized i feel like it's going to be very hard to get another flag out there tbh

June 26, 2018, 6:52 pm by

?️‍??️‍??️‍??️‍??️‍?

June 26, 2018, 6:38 pm by

(To add to this thought, I've heard that TWERFs like it and, frankly, the flag is not for and by bigots, it is for and by all lesbians, especially trans lesbians.)

June 26, 2018, 6:33 pm by

Just have to say that in general I love these but...as a butch person I'm really, deeply uncomfortable with the weird phenomenon that is the removal of the lipstick print from the lipstick lesbian pride flag and the subsequent claim that it's for all lesbians. There are plenty of other butch lesbians who feel similarly alienated and uncomfortable. The traditional lesbian pride flag featuring the labrys would be a nice addition to the flags already existent.

June 26, 2018, 6:31 pm by

A bit off topic but is anyone else a little bothered by Quinten's HA? It's the lack of lines around their chin.

June 26, 2018, 6:30 pm by

YES! These are great and make me so happy to see! Just had a great time at Pride, which was amazing, and definitely feeling in a very prideful mood! I'm glad to see that most of the comments here are positive too. It's nice to see people becoming more accepting.

June 26, 2018, 6:22 pm by

after reading some of the comments, i guess i just really don't understand the people requesting any sort of straight pride item? i mean, i think you should be proud of your sexuality no matter what you choose to identify as, and you should carry that pride with you in your heart every single day, but it's a little bit silly (from my perspective, anyway) to take a celebration directly made for and perpetuated by a marginalized group and demand to be included and represented even though you are quite literally a part of the (maybe not intentionally, but still, oppressive whether through silence/complicity or intentionally) majority? nobody has to come out as straight and straight people don't face nearly as much discrimination because the reality is that heteronormativity is woven into our society as an unconscious and immediately socially accepted thing. the various facets of queer identity aren't (despite the tireless work of so many advocates that i, and i'm sure many other users are grateful for) and THAT is why pride month is about representing and elevating those voices and identities. everyone is welcome to celebrate but this is a moment to, if you are a member of the majority, take a seat, listen, learn and support a community that otherwise doesn't receive very much of it at all.

June 26, 2018, 6:15 pm by

Asking for a het pride flag is like asking for a cis pride flag: ultimately pointless because both of these identities have a history of oppressing, killing and criminalizing LGBT+ identities, which is kinda why pride is, a thing in the first place? That we're here despise what the world threw at us and no matter how many times we were attempted to stomped out. It's not about "exclusion" to not put them in a pride flag collection. If historically oppressed people having one month a year to celebrate with some pretty flags feels like exclusion, it's kinda a you problem in the end.

Also, you're ace anyway as you said, man, and there's a flag for you too anyway.

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Quest Shop: Pride Sashes

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