Granted, but the day you overcome your fear you get bitten and die.

I wish I had an electric turkey carver and a power drill combined into one.

Granted, but you drill through the table and the floor and fall into a basement full of poltergeists and yet more power drill-turkey carvers. The poltergeists throw the drill-carvers at you and you die.

I wish I had naturally purple eyes...

Granted, but then people think you're a freak and you hauled in for testing.

I wish i knew a celebrity.

Granted, but that celebrity is MJ's dead, rotting body. Ew.

I wish I had a one-way ticket to CANADA

Granted, but you end up where I am...HOPE YA LIKE BLIZZARDS BY"S!

no wish, hard to grant

i wish my fingernails were longer

Whoopsi...

Granted, but you accidentally grow them too long then you stab yourself.

I wish I had memory.

Granted, but it's full of trash.

I wish I knew what was in area 51...

Granted, but the government finds out you know and kills you.

I wish I could spell.

Granted, but you can only spell on Wednesdays at three in the morning.

I wish my hair streaks wouldn't fade...

Granted but they grow into white and your grow old quickly. GRANNY PIRATE!

I wish I could expand matter!

Granted, but the only matter you can expand is that in your own nose hair.

I wish I could have brownies whenever I wanted them...

GRanted. It's poisoned O.o

I wish I weren't hurting :'(

Granted, but your mad skillz are too much for the world to handle and you are sentenced to death

Ferris doesn't have a wish, so..

I wish I had freckles. ):

Granted, it explodes. But it doesn't hurt anymore! I wish I had super awesome hair.

Granted, but Edward kills you for wanting it.

I wish I had a Subeta Item that looked like the RED Spy's revolver.

A

ah but your do..you just have a warped self impression and cant see its beauty when you look in the mirror..

i wish i could be where my heart is right now ....

Granted, but it eats you.

I wish I had a TF2 background.

A

Granted, but you lose it FOREVER. I wish I never made a wish.