I commend your decision not to have children if you don't want them. There are already too many children in this world; a lot with parents who didn't want children in the first place or don't deserve children. My daughter has also made the choice not to have children and I respect that decision. His mother should also respect the decision the two of you have made. Don't lie to her, just tell her this was a joint decision and tell her the subject is closed. You may change your mind in the future, or not, or you may decide to adopt, but it is your choice and she needs to understand that.

I have been childfree since I was in my teens (I am almost 40). This topic is near and dear to my heart. Anything people can say about being childfree, I have heard it--from my parents, my doctors, my friends, my coworkers, and even complete strangers.

All of this only increases when you get married (and as your own friends get married and start families of their own), especially with a hungry grandmother-to-be waiting in the wings. It will only diminish when you get to be my age or a little older.

Not only do I know what people have said to you and the pressure you have felt, like you I am also very aware that I am disappointing people. But, you know what? Children are not an experiment. And they aren't something I owe to other people. So often people see children (or grandchildren) as a right, but, to me, they are a privilege. I choose not to partake of that privilege. And my life is very complete and happy with no children in it.

You and your boyfriend are allowed to make your own decision about what you want from life, and if children isn't a part of that life, then that is okay. It's your boyfriend's mother who needs to get over herself. One of my biggest pet peeves in life is overbearing mothers who try to guilt their children into having grandchildren, as if it's something they are owed. NO.

I have put more thought into not having children than most people put into having them. My reasons for not wanting them are vast and I won't go into them here, but you can PM me if you want to talk more about it, as well as what I say to refute the common statements people make when they find out I am childfree.

I had surgery to prevent having children altogether when I was 30; it took me a while to find a doctor who would do it, but I did and it was the most amazing, empowering thing I've ever done. I knew that, no matter who I was dating (or married to), my decision to be childfree would remain the same, so I did it for me, and it was awesome. I don't regret it for an instant.

I am an aunt, and I am often told I'm the best aunt ever. (I tend to agree!) I like kids, I just don't want my own under any circumstances.

Luckily I think I'm still under the age that parents start whining for grandkids, so I have not been getting nagged Neither my boyfriend nor I want children, we're not of the right temperament to deal with human spawn...

From what I've heard and seen though, I think the whole "make me some grandbabies" is very selfish of parents, and they're ultimately looking for their last chance to be needed by little ones since their children are now adults who make their own choices. If someone doesn't want children, they've got their reasons, and everyone should just butt out.

Do whatever makes YOU happy, because honestly, having a kid to please your Mom would absolutely be the wrong reason to have a child. I have kids myself, I never wanted any, let alone 3, but they are my life and the moment I laid eyes on my eldest my whole perspective on parenthood changed. Regardless of what you do, I am confident you will make the best decision for yourself, your partner, and your relationship. :)

I'm in the same boat. I don't want kids but my mother (and grandparents) want me to have kids. I strongly feel that I'm not in the right mental health to deal with a human being and my mom is becoming to understand. My grandparents - not so much. My grandpa doesn't know but my grandma does and she always tells me that I'll get "sick" if I don't have kids.

I don't know, but that doesn't change my decision on the matter. But yeah, do what makes you and your partner happy! It's your body, your choice if you want kids or not.

I never want children either. The thought of something inside me makes me shudder. Not to mention why would I want to go through 9 months of pain and sickness? No thanks.

Also...I've never had a boyfriend, and I never want to or plan on getting married. However, if I ever end up with someone, I want it to be someone who doesn't want kids either, or at least understands that I don't want kids and WON'T mind it at all, and won't pressure me into changing my mind. But the thing is, the idea of ....sex makes me really uncomfortable. If I ever end up with someone, I want him to understand I don't want to do it...ever. But I don't know if I'll ever find someone who will understand why when I don't know myself. All in all, though, the chances of me ending with someone is zero. Just thinking that I would end up with someone is laughable. It's just not going to happen at all.

Anyways....I've told my mom a few times I never want kids, let alone get married, and she seems to be okay with it.

I've yet to have someone tell me I will change my mind. But I would be really annoyed if it did happen.