a joke: my life :kek: (jk jk im not entering im just a dumbass)

What does a dandelion say to a rose?

What does and oasis and a desert have between each other?

What does a pyrotechnician say to a pyromaniac?

Items:

Where do ducks go to get fast money??

To the pond broker....

[Item=crown of the innocent infidel] [Item=innocent vampire corset] [Item=triangular silver bodychain]

A cat walks into a bar. The bartender asks, “what can I get you?”. The cat says, “A shot of whiskey.”

The bartender pours the cat the drink and puts it onto the bar. Slowly, the cat pushes the shot off the bar before immediately demanding, “ANOTHER!”.

My favorite joke works just in German but this one is similar

Items: Bodychain - Corset - Crown

Q: How do you make a hot dog stand? A: You take away its chair.

ty!!

After setting up their tent and falling asleep, Batman wakes his faithful friend. “Robin, look up at the sky and tell me what you see.” Robin replies, “ I see millions of stars.” “What does that tell you?” asks Batman. Robin ponders for a minute. “Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo. Chronologically, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, it’s evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant. Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you, Batman?” Batman is silent for a moment, then speaks: “Robin, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent."

1. Bodychain
2. Wings
3. Corset

First one's kinda long....

Heisenberg and Schrödinger get pulled over for speeding

The cop asks Heisenberg: "Do you know how fast you were going?"

Heisenberg replies: "No, but we know exactly where we are!"

The officer looks at him, confused, and says: "You were going 108 miles per hour!"

Heisenberg throws his arms up and cries: "Great! Now we're lost!"

The officer looks over to the car and asks Schrödinger if the two men have anything in the trunk.

"A cat", Schrödinger replies.

The cop opens the trunk and yells: "Hey! This cat is dead."

Schrödinger angrily replies: "Well, he is now!"

(This also works with chemists and pathologists.)

There's a medical joke that builds on that one.

"What's the difference between homeopathic remedies and American beer?"

"No difference--they're both exactly like making love in a canoe."

Thanks for doing this, and I hope you feel better soon!

why do ducks have tails?
[spoiler] to hide their buttquacks! [/Spoiler]
honestly I laughed so hard the first time I heard it I still laugh when someone else says it
as for the CW's I love the body chain, Swan and tailcoat in that order ^^ thank you for bringing brightness in this dark time c:

Hope you get some time to rest. I'm fine, thanks. Although I'm also a bit tired because I'm working on my normal shift and at night to disinfect the town x.x

Well, I went with a Subeta-related one, I hope this comic strips I did count xD

[Img]https://i.ibb.co/KLY2d6H/SAVE-20200429-163707.jpg[/img]


1. [Item=Crown of the Innocent Infidel] 2. [Item=Triangular Silver Bodychain] 3. [Item=Innocent Vampire Corset]

Idk if this is a joke or more of a pun or a dad joke but I love it x3

Did you hear about that actress who got stabbed last night? Reese something....

"witherspoon?"

"No, with a knife!" XD

1.Corset 2. Body chain 3. Wings

These are some solid dad/bad jokes lol, but:

What’s the best thing about Switzerland?

Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboards?

Why don’t Calculus majors throw house parties?

Also, my favourite joke (that typing out would not do justice to) is John Mulaney's Salt and Pepper Diner bit, it gets me every time! [link=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QnkrL42R7gk]Here, if you haven't seen it before![/link]

1. [Item=crown of the innocent infidel]
2. [Item=innocent vampire corset]
3. [Item=triangular silver bodychain] (All of these are so beautiful oh my gosh!)

Joke: I really hope you like philosophers cause this one doesnt work if you dont know abt Rene Descartes.

Descartes is at a bar, drinking, and has had a couple, but not so many drinks that the bartender wants to cut him off, so the bartender asks Descartes if he wants another drink. Descartes replies "I think not" and then disappears.

Priorities: Bodychain, Corset, Wings (I own those already lol)

What is a sealion's favorite subject in school?

(Wings, chain, corset)

What’s the difference between a literalist and a kleptomaniac? A literalist takes things literally. A kleptomaniac takes things, literally. 1.2.3.

What do you call a parade of rabbits hopping backwards? A receding hare-line.

lmao guys ,,, these jokes are actually really good ( ´ ▽ ` )

Why are anteaters never sick?

What did one ocean say to the other ocean?

I'm a social vegan

1. Body chain 2. Corset 3. Wings

i like silly drawn jokes (aka i can't think of a good classic joke at the mo so here have a funny drawing)

by Hannah Hillam (i also love Sarah's Scribbles)

thanks for the chance ❤ my preferences are wings then chain then corset i've been tired recently too...combination of new meds and just being super busy =-= can someone who is bored at home pls take over my jobs for a few weeks so i can stay home and chill with my cat k thnx bai

Did you hear about the cheese factory that exploded in France?

There was nothing left but de Brie.

1. Innocent Vampire Corset
2. Crown of the Innocent Infidel
3. Triangular Silver Bodychain

My dog used to chase people on bikes a lot... eventually it got so bad I had to take his bike away! ;)

Preference: > >