die a hero

own a giant snake or a giant spider?

Fight zombies, or renegade AI?

Zombies. I don't want to have to fight my fridge controlled by AI.

Summer forever (and thus extreme drought, crop failure, & starvation) or winter forever (and thus crop failure & starvation)?

winter forever?

bright sun all the time (really bright) or complete darkness/absolutely no sunlight 24/7?

Perpetual darkness, where I can see best.

Strive for samurai, or just another ninja?

Another ninja. I don't like infamy.

Lose an arm or a lose a leg?

Lose the leg, no woman stands by a wheelchair.

Live with no electricity, or no internet?

no electricity would be fun tbh!

eat fruit on pizza or have bits of pizza in your fruit salad?

eat fruit on pizza

no pizzas ever again or eat a big pizza everyday?

A big pizza! I can't live without pizza.

Pick your nose or fart in front of your crush?

Pick my nose, If she stays it means she's one left. And not just another right one.

The right one, or the one left?

The right one. I've wasted too much time with others.

Eat a brick or have a brick dropped on your foot?

Drop as many as you'd like, I only wear steel toe boots.

You may as well, that's all there is. The one left doesn't exist, not for sinister guys.

Lobotomize Jack, or clean and dress Tom?

Clean and dress Tom. Idk who these people are but nobody deserves to be lobotomized

Get 10 paper cuts or 1 first degree burn?

Burn me. Scars are ugly.

Take a Wisconsin Death Trip, or a South Texas Death Ride?

Wisconsin Death Trip. Not sure what either are haha

Be able to breathe underwater or talk to fish?

Breathe water, dive deeper and frolic with the isopods. ❤

Restore a car, or a house?

A house! I don't have a driver's license.

Lick some ice cream or sip hot soup?

sip hot soup?

jog for a mile or walk for two miles?

Walk for two miles. So much more relaxing.

Have a grandfather clock or a cuckoo clock?