Wish granted. But after a minute, the water turns to ice and you're stuck forever.

I wish I could float.

Granted, but you will never be able to go under the water ever again.

I wish I could stop being hungry at night after class.

Granted. You begin packing yourself a lunch early in the day, and you eat it during class. But the lunches are always smushed and cold by this point, and don't taste particularly delicious.

I wish my dog would come when I called him. >>

Granted. He tackles you down the stairs and your back breaks.

I wish The Legend of Dragoon would get a re-release with a graphical overhaul and all the typos corrected.

Granted, but it can only be bought via download to computer, and the site you buy it off of (after paying, I might add) gives your hard drive a virus so bad that you entire computer short-circuits and doesn't work anymore.

I wish I was a man.

Granted, but once you become a man, everyone forgets that you are you.

I wish I had a blanket.

Wish granted. But it keeps flying off your body.

I wish I could change my hair color anytime I wanted.

Granted, but something goes terribly wrong and it keeps changing magically without stopping.

I wish my partner in this presentation I am doing would start working on his portion of it soon.

Granted. But your partner stopped working the next day because he felt lazy about it again.

No wish to grant.

I wish that I could sleep.

Wish granted, but your sleep is disrupted by hands pulling you into the mattress and ultimately your sleep lead to your death.

I wish a certain person would stop arguing with me. C:

Wish granted. But it's because they forget you exist. :C

I wish I could meet Neil Patrick Harris.

Edit for massive failure

Granted. However, all he does is punch you in the face.

I wish I could play the ocarina.

Punched in the face by NPH? Worth it.

Wish granted. But Zelda fangirls steal your ocarina, leaving you with a broken banjo.

I wish my Subeta shop would price itself with the right prices.

Granted, but then no one cares to buy the items from your shop.

I wish I could stay up late tonight.

Granted, but you forgot about an appointment or exam and slept through it.

I wish I were wealthy enough not to have to go to work.

Wish granted, but you spent all the money on trivial things

I wish my favourite tea cup didn't have a little chip in it :(

Granted. It's completely broken.

I wish I were with my friends right now.

Granted, but when you are, they ignore you.

I wish I had more movies.

Granted. They're all low-budget indie movies that aren't even that good.

I wish "A New World Fool" would stop playing in my head.

Edit for typo