Avast, ye scalliwags!

Th' Beach Shop (thas' right, not thet yella-bellied clothin' shack) s'got a shipload o' top-a-th'-line pirate fare for yer wearin' pleasure what just washed up off th' shore, arrr.
An' don't be givin' me any lip about them hearts, else it'll be the plank for ye!