A large BOOM dissipates throughout the Darkside. It appears that a building has been turned to dust! The original zappper, oh no!



Uh, whoops! Sorry guys, that’s my bad. Oh but hey, my experiment worked! Look at me, I’m all rejuvenated. Nothing like a bit of mad science to keep your body trim. Huh. I guess I used a bit too much energy though and destroyed the competition. Who would have foreseen such a completely accidental happenstance. cough Oh well, it’s not like that other guy…clawsion…terracoon? was really much use to anyone. Done you all a favor, really. It’s ok, he didn’t get caught in the blast! I totally saw him running away, probably gone to live in Riverside with the swampies. He did love those swampies.

Moving on, my zapper is much better anyway! The one TRUE zapper. Come visit it, I even upgraded it to have something I think is pretty fly if you like experiments as much as me. The EXPERIMENTS ONLY option! For just a small fee, that I will totally use to fund the making of MORE experiments, you can ensure that your zap is not wasted on lame /normal/ pets or stat gains or stuff like that. Experiments all the way! EXPERIMENTS FOREVER!



Oh, except I have these two duds for you today. I mean, some people told me they were super adorable or something but where is the fun in that? If you want super adorable there are plenty of normal subeta pets for that. I should be creating cool things that are oozing and dripping and have tentacles. I was going to call these failures and move on but I guess they can stay, if you people really do like abominations like these. Cute. Bleh.