No, humans can't experience real G forces beyond single digit anyway. How many do peregrine falcons go every dive?

The next person who posts has a specific lucky coin. (I did, a Garfield dollar.)

Nope.

Next person enjoys absurdist humour that makes no sense.

Oh yes, truly absurd humour is borne of the sinister mind.

The next person who posts complains about a job, yet completes the task.

Has no job at all :(

The next person who posts is a college student.

Not at this time, still need two more months to have a semester's tuition.

The next person who posts has any kind of Mp3CD player.

CD player, but I don't like listening to music without headphones, so I never use it.

Next person is confused about something really important?

Yes, I am. I refuse to accept its "importance". This scam called marriage.

The next person who posts has wool clothing.

Nonononononoooo it's too scratchyyyyy owwwww

Next person sometimes wonders if they are truly, in their soul, an actual person. (not a bad thing as far as I'm concerned)

I tend to think I was born the wrong species, among other shortcomings of being the weakest creature of all.

The next person who posts has no living grandparents.

Hmm... well, you are correct. :/

The next person who posts has never solved a Rubik's cube. o.o

Not a Rubik's, a Tetrimino though...

The next person who posts is saving for a lofty goal.

Yes,if Subetabucks count. , I love seeing myself getting lower on the richest user list.

you forgot to make an assumption o.o

The next person is allergic to tomatoes o.o. no, not peanuts, tomatoes! (regardless of how they pronounce the word)

Sorry, no.

But the next person who posts will be in the dark...

About a lot of things yes, ambient light though is minimal. (The moon outside is brighter.)

The next person who posts had a cocktail with dinner.

Nope. I'm already messed up without drinking. For example: I forgot to have dinner.

Next person makes references to stuff they don't understand.

Only when referring to the 80's.

The next person who posts has no interest in "likes".

It's good to hear when people enjoy something I've made or relate to something I said, but I don't tie myself in knots seeking approval.

Next person wants to be somewhere else.

Nah, I'm finally enjoying where I live now (but if it was "wants their partner to be with them in person right now."...)

Next person doesn't want to try new food, but ends up liking it when they do finally try

I'm the opposite.

Next person has had the same song stuck in their head for a week.