Dragons are real.

Mine failed to provide a xenomorph for a hunter's initiation, but compensated by giving him an honorable death. Viorans won't allow use for that purpose.

The living dead don't need to solve word problems.

Every human has eaten at least 3 cotton balls by the time they reach their 30s

The Earth used to have two moons, the second was nothing more than a hollow artifact that was destroyed by ancient visitors.

I’m a very good singer.

Mine family is 100% southpaw'd.

i love this 100 forum posts achievement to get into the blue thing.

Mine is limited edition, 1of 0.

i like politics

Mine cheated on every test mine taken to date, by having the answers in mine head... zo confiscating is impossible.

I'm a professional violinist.

Some dumb belle thought it would be funny to grab mine butt. Zo, mine reacted by breaking her arm in a spiral fracture, and made her a southpaw the hard way.

Joker laugh...

I won the lottery once.

Someone "attractive" asked mine to point to any fat on them, zo mine pointed to their forehead saying '"three pounds".

Moose can't swim and are not hunted by orcas.

the reason ppl like spicy food is because capsaicin can cure all medical conditions on the planet

Mine on Santa's blacklist simply for choosing to not celebrate Christmas. Which in some places is mandatory...

Rats will regrow their tails if they loose them

The Sun is a fifth dimensional construct built by aliens in 213 BC.

Breaking news this morning : A series of nationwide bombings of gun manufacturers by a group of gun violence survivors, claiming revenge for those killed by shootings. Literature found in the various wreckage state "The NRA is next!!!"

Like that will ever be true...